When will it stop hurting?

**kerry-** · 07-10-2010 04:13 PM

I've had sex properly only once, which was all pain and blood, that I expected. Me and my boyfriend tried doing it but it hurt again, we were kind of drunk and decided to hold it off until we were sober. Recently (kind of embarrassing!) I bought a vibrator as a means of erm stretching me out a little bit so sex will be more comfortable ( 10cm girth, 18cm length) and it still hurts to penetrate myself with it. I can get it in about half way then I get like a weird pain in the pit of my stomach almost so it makes me not want to push any farther, when will sex/penetration stop hurting? Has my hymen been properly broken in? (We still have lots of fun in the bedroom and it isn't like he's pestering me for sex or anything.)Confused and would appreciate replies from you more experienced ladies!
Kerry X

**jns** · 07-10-2010 04:28 PM

10cm is about 1 1/4 inches in diameter and 18cm is just a bit more than 7 inches. So half way is about 3 1/2 inches, which is about the depth of an unaroused vagina for some per other threads. The vagina can lengthen and widen when a woman is sexually aroused. Have you been orgasming before trying deep penetration?

**kerry-** · 07-10-2010 05:22 PM

Originally Posted by jns

10cm is about 1 1/4 inches in diameter and 18cm is just a bit more than 7 inches. So half way is about 3 1/2 inches, which is about the depth of an unaroused vagina for some per other threads. The vagina can lengthen and widen when a woman is sexually aroused. Have you been orgasming before trying deep penetration?

No I haven't been orgasming before trying, I find climaxing easy but can never bring myself to actually orgasm

**BasketCase** · 07-10-2010 05:34 PM

Foreplay is really important right now. Make sure that you are properly wet and aroused before plunging in. I can't speak for all girls here but for me it took about 5 times before I was really comfortable with it. And about 7 times before I had an orgasm. But I know of other girls that took a little longer. A vibe may not be the best idea right not. Try a rubber dildo with a "jelly" feel, with no vibrating fuctions. I can only imagine that would make it more uncomfotable because most vibes are not shaped exactly like a penis and are a bit large. Like the metallic ones. (i'm still not comfortable with those). I personally bleed the first 3 times. The part that sucks is that every girl has to go through the painful part. It is just a part of it. But there are ways to make it a little better. Lube may help and being aroused will also help. Good luck

**kerry-** · 07-11-2010 01:48 PM

Thanks for the advice Basketcase

First three times?! Ohh no that will probably be me as well knowing my luck lol poor women

It's just you're always told First time is the only pain and blood, guess that's not really the case : )

**BasketCase** · 07-11-2010 02:16 PM

Originally Posted by kerry-

Thanks for the advice Basketcase

First three times?! Ohh no that will probably be me as well knowing my luck lol poor women

It's just you're always told First time is the only pain and blood, guess that's not really the case : )

No not in all cases. I thought it was unusual too. But I think it took him three times to fully break me. Have your man grind and caress a lot before acually penetrating. That will really help. And if at all possible, try to orgasm before penetration. Even if it takes an hour.

It will all be worth it soon enough.

**kerry-** · 07-12-2010 06:08 AM

Thanks again you've actually made me feel normal haha. It's just when all my friends started having sex they were telling me how much better it is the second time, really wasn't the case with me lol.

**WildChild** · 07-12-2010 07:28 AM

Originally Posted by kerry-

No I haven't been orgasming before trying, I find climaxing easy but can never bring myself to actually orgasm

HUH?
How do you differentiate climaxing from orgasming?

**WildChild** · 07-12-2010 07:31 AM

Originally Posted by BasketCase

. A vibe may not be the best idea right not. Try a rubber dildo with a "jelly" feel, with no vibrating fuctions.

Watch out with the 'jelly' products most are somewhat toxic materials and more difficult to keep really clean, they could trigger an allergy like response in some people.