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Thread: I can't orgasm through penetration

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    Default I can't orgasm through penetration


    My boyfriend can make me cum through oral sex but when we have penetrative sex I can't orgasm. Is there any tips on how to climax, positions techniques etc.
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    Lot's of us have had or do have this problem. Stimulating your clit is the key. Lots of times, depending on the position you are using, a guy's penis will not rub this area. Try gently touching your clit during his penetration. Don't be embarassed to do this. It's a normal part of sex. This should make you cum.

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    Skirt is right, for many women it's just not plausible to come through penetration alone. I mean would you come if your boyfriend humped your arm, or a lock of your hair?

    Obviously that's an extreme comparison, but the point is that for many of us it's all about clitoral stimulation, and mind...

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    I also agree that Skirt's correct. A lot of women can't orgasm that way...I'm one of them. (Actually, I almost AAALMOST came once through penetration alone...but, he stopped too soon. Grr. >.< Could have been a major breakthrough, lol.) And I also suggest doing what Skirt suggested and stimulate your clit during penetration. It shouldn't be embarrassing at all...in fact, your guy may even like it. I know it seems to turn my boyfriend on, which makes the whole experience even better. ;D

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    first of all, its fairly normal but with practice and patience you'll be fine. let him get you as aroused as possible through oral or by touch, then get on top him. usually women on top is best either facing him or facing away form him ie. reverse cowgirl.

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    I have been lucky to experience orgasm both clitorial and vaginally. The first time I had a vaginal orgasm I felt this huge wave of pleasure from the most inner part of my body, it was a complete different feel than the centralized clitoral orgasm. The vaginal orgasms that I have with my husband now, happens pretty easily- last night in fact. I let myself totally "go" and hold nothing back; I let him get me aroused to the point where I cannot stand it anymore and then let him inside. I have a way of positioning my body to which his penis can reach what they call the "deep spot" aka "a-spot". It only takes me about 6 or 7 times for his penis to make contact with that spot and then I am in a complete, whole body orgasm. It is such a strong orgasm, it makes my eyes water---it feels that good! My first vaginal orgasm was with someone I was not married to and then went about 5 more years until I met my husband that I had another one, and I think it had a lot to do with my mental state and that I was truly in love with my husband. The good thing about orgasms with either the g-spot or the a-spot is that you can have them over and over. After a clitoral orgasm, your clit is so sensitive that it can't tolerate more "action"--I've tried, but it just actually hurts. There is a man by the name of David Shade who has some good info on the locations of the a-spot and g-spot. Google him--there is a non-explicit video he has that is helpful. I also watched a YouTube of a man named Jason Julius who talks about orgasms, he is very helpful too. After researching more about it, just experiment, experiment, experiment!

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    Quote Originally Posted by skirt99 View Post
    Lot's of us have had or do have this problem. Stimulating your clit is the key. Lots of times, depending on the position you are using, a guy's penis will not rub this area. Try gently touching your clit during his penetration. Don't be embarassed to do this. It's a normal part of sex. This should make you cum.
    Another way is in a position like the "cowgirl," woman on top or astraddle his lap with him sitting or reclining, which allows the man to also use a hand to stimulate her clitoris. This can work very very well!
    Best of luck!
    - TR

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    Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Array Texasred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nla302 View Post
    After a clitoral orgasm, your clit is so sensitive that it can't tolerate more "action"--I've tried, but it just actually hurts.
    I somewhat disagree: my grilfriend used to feel that way, but I learned to adjust the pressure and speed at which I was stroking her when she reaches that point of extreme sensitivity, and now she tells me - just this morning in fact - that "I can't believe I used to make you stop!"
    She now will have either one very very long orgasm, lasting several minutes, or a series of orgasms one right after another, until I finally stop touching her to keep her from hyperventilating!
    She seems to like it...

    My point is that, it seems that with practice the feeling of hyper-sensitivity is something that can be overcome, to your benefit. I wish I could tell you exactly how that's done, but I can suggest practicing to find out!

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    You need to learn to peak and then slow down and then peak your clitoral stimulation. In other words, don't keep doing the same thing, Back a even for a moment, stimulate elsewhere and then go bakc to it. You should be able to orgasm clitorally over and over again.
    We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer

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    Honestly, I don't really orgasm that much through penetration either. My clit has to be stimulated or I can't cum.

    I think it mostly has to do with the fact that I've been pleasuring myself by rubbing my clit since I was a kid. That's the way I like it.

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