One night stand-- aftermath rejection or not?

**P_n** · 08-24-2010 10:59 PM

So I went out friday night, i met this boy at a club. I was pretty wasted by the end of the night and we started making out. We exchanged numbers then he proceeded to ask me to go to his place. I felt weird so i told him to come to mine. We went back and forth and finally I went to his. We ended up having sex and the next morning. The weird part was we talked about life and school. He's a med student -resident and talked about his experiences. We both agreed this was the weirdest one night stands we had. We hung out till around noon and then we told me.. " you have my number hit me up if u want to chill." He said it a few times assuming he was interested. I had just gone out of a long-term relationship and the last thing i want is a relationship. He openly told me he sleeps around but we had protected sex, well untiil the condom broke. I freaked out he assured me he was safe. Being the doc he is, advised me to take the plan b. A few days later i took, texted him if it would still be effective. He called me right away asking me if i was ok if i was taking the right medicine. (never got that sympathy from the exbf) We had a weird patient/doctor/one night stand conversation. I told him he was asking me weird questions if i were to get pregnant he told me "i know everything about this has been pretty weird." Later that evening, i was going out. So i texted him "im going to be out do you wanna hang." I knew he was working, since he told me he was at work. He texted a few hours later saying "he was working late, and on call until morning, and doesnt usually hang out on the weekdays." My friends told me not to reply to leave some mystery. WHAT THIS REJECTION from him half... ????????? What would i have done? Reply or not?

**Mes T** · 08-25-2010 12:20 AM

Don't play games.

The man's a doctor, he's busy during work days. Take it easy or you'll push him away. Reply saying something along the lines of "well if you're free next weekend let me know, I'm planning to blah-blah-blah. cheers!"

**rkellogs** · 08-25-2010 04:16 AM

Wow! I had an experience very similar to yours a few years ago, he also slept around and was a doc with a big ego, it never worked out. He was constantly busy and wanted an open relationship, I was like "yeah right"... I ended it and then met the love of my life. My advice is be careful, think about yourself and what you want.

**Fatin** · 08-25-2010 04:41 AM

I agree with Mes_T don't play games I dont know why people love to do that .. just be yourself

**P_n** · 08-25-2010 06:33 AM

I know I shouldn't play any games... But I'm not looking for a relationship. I'm perfectly content with an open relationship. I just don't know if I should be the one initiating the next move, considering he said he doesn't really hang on weekdays.

**pretzel** · 08-25-2010 08:03 AM

No offense, but it sounds to me like you were at the right place at the right time. He enjoyed himself, you yourself. That may well be as far it will go.

**T-man** · 08-25-2010 08:42 AM

Hey there.

There's nothing wrong with two people meeting and enjoying each other. He was also honest with you and told you he was seeing other people. i.e. he's not looking for a relationship, if you are then he's not the guy for you. He's a doctor, he's busy. When he said he doesn't go out week nights it because he's working, not because he's half rejecting you. I don't think he's playing games at all, nor do I think you are, from what you've said. If you're cool with not getting too serious then enjoy yourself. However, the fact that you're analysing this so much kinda implies you're taking this a little more seriously than you're intending. Perhaps you're feeling insecure after just getting out of a relationship. That's something you should think about.

My advice, if you're happy with an open relationship, is to move on, find someone else to enjoy yourself with, completely relax and then see if you can meet up with doc in a week or two.
;-) And if nothing more ever comes of it, so what. You had a good night.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-25-2010 06:53 PM

You know it's funny, when you get attention that you've never received before, you fall huh.... I know you say you don't want a relationship, but the fact your asking, what your move should be, means you would prefer him not to be out of your life in any event... Interested.

Protect your heart mam, to start with.. He's a Doctor, the reason he doesn't "hang out" weekdays is because he takes his career seriously, he's on call, he works, he's tired as well.

He's offering, a friendship hand, one with "yeah" we clicked ok, we can hang out on weekends, not exclusively however, as I've already told her I play the field, not interested in a relationship....

So stick to that.. Get on with your life, if you feel like hanging out on a weekend, see what he's doing, but protect your heart because we are dreamers, live a little in fantasy and don't hear what's said, rather believe we can change it.

CW

**P_n** · 08-25-2010 09:14 PM

I think at this point.. I really don't want a relationship. I just don't get how this whole dating game works. I was in a 7 year relationship. So I'm new to this. I also don't like rejection, which is why I wanted opinions. I guess my objective was if he's not interested then i should let it be, since men give off different signals. I'm not looking for anything exclusive, just some fun. So I wasn't sure if i should initiate the, hey lets hook up again deal no strings attached. Thanks all!

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-26-2010 04:43 AM

Ok, p_n

It is hard, I was married for 7 and a half and then had to do the same thing...

This is what you will find.

BAGGAGE - those who have been hurt, taken and won't let you in.
NOT READY - those who enjoy just company, from many , not committed, that will just let you hang
READY - Those who have gotten past it all and ready for something/someone in their life.
ANGRY - Those who will use, want someone, but purely for themselves, angry over what occured in their last relationship

You seem to have one that is NOT READY. So I get what your asking.

Listen to the signals, they are not mixed, I work, I have a career, you and I got on cool, good sex, call me, but not on working days and we can hang out, I play as I am not ready to settle...

You can inituate he told you to, but only on weekends... no strings...

Hope we helped more.

CW