Thread: Sex drive, Major Changes!

Your story sounds similar to mine. My Libido went thru the roof a year ago and that's when I found this forum. My best advice... ENJOY! I was also worried about loosing it but while it has tamed a bit from the first 2 weeks or so it is still MUCH more than it was over the last 9 years. The hard part for me is DH always thought he was High libido but I'm finding out that that is not necessarily true. If he is tired I get nothing and since he is getting it so much never initiates which is getting old. Yeah for me payback is a B**ch... oh well. We are both much happier overall and life is good.

Oh I have also found that taking my vitamins, drinking plenty of water, and eating better have helped. When I eat too much junky food I am NOT in the mood....

foxdana, we are a few years older than you guys and about 3 years ago my wife suddenly had this increase in sex drive. And mine has slowly decreased over the years.
Like you she wants it often. We both laugh sometime about it. It really starts her rolling when we do have a good intimate session. When I am not in the mood and she is, sometimes I will give her oral, and usually that is arousing enough for me to at least MB.
I started doing this at these times and it has actually been something that she really enjoys.

do you women have any idea what is happening, or what is changing that is causing your sex drive to skyrocket? My wife and I will have sex about once every two or three months if I truely bother her for it. She isn't sorry that her sex drive is low, isn't appologetic about it, and says there is nothing we can do about it (isn't interested in seeing a doctor, nutritionist or therapist). I realize my last statement sounds kind of harsh, it was just quick telling of facts. I love her dearly with all my heart and have stayed true to her, it's just frustrating that she takes it at face value and figures "what else can I do, if I'm not interested, I'm not interested." I'd love to get it down to even once a month, and to the OP who said she'd still manage to do it once a week, that is amazing, because even after we have sex once after a few months, my wife still makes it like she did me a favor (about a year and a half ago we only had sex twice in a year). We are young, too (late 20's), and do have 3 younger kids, but the sex could definitely be more frequent. Anyway, if any of you women have any idea what changed that made you go from not interested to all you could think about, please let me know!! And any other advice for me and my wife I'd be willing to hear as well. Thanks.

Originally Posted by foxdana

Hi All, I am new to this forum, and I have read alot about people with little or no sex drive. I was one of those until 3 months ago. I have been married for 17 years and would only want sex every month or so, if I was lucky. My husband wanted it alot more than that so my compromise was to go once a week, if I could be bothered. It sounds horrible, but it was such an effort to go through the whole routine.

I orgasm every time we have sex, through digital stimulation, and enjoyed sex, but it just never entered my mind.

Now 3 months ago something in my head went snap and now I can't get enough sex! I want it every day or more if I can get it. I don't know what caused this and now my husband is asking me to lay off as I am wearing his penis down to a stub! We have comprimised and now do it 4 to 5 times a week.

Has anyone experienced this? It seems so strange that this change could happen so quickly and it is such a radical change.

Thanks for your imput

Oh MY GOD!!! Finally someone else like me....I want sex ALL the time!! I seem to always be aroused...when i awake.....during the day....and when i go to bed. BF is always tired...he only wants sex about once a month. I am seriously wondering if there is something wrong with me.

I would like to know as well... I have not been interested in sex and I feel terrible for my hisband...oral sex is fine for him ...I think I need something else ;-(

Originally Posted by skysthelimit

We are young, too (late 20's), and do have 3 younger kids, but the sex could definitely be more frequent. Anyway, if any of you women have any idea what changed that made you go from not interested to all you could think about, please let me know!! And any other advice for me and my wife I'd be willing to hear as well. Thanks.

I think what jumped out at me about your post was that you are in your late 20's and already have 3 Younger kids .

Are either of you " fixed ' ? Or on a Birth Control or use Protection ?
Having kids is not only the 9 month Pregnancy, but also takes a toll on a woman's body, physically and emotionally..

Is it possible that after 3 kids, she may subconsciously associate Sex with Kids and Pregnancy ?

It is difficult to have Romantic nights or weekends planned even without kids and so much harder with them . unless you can have a support system, family or friends that will take the kids, all of them and give you two time to relax and enjoy each other. To reconnect with each other.

I don't mean send the kids to Grandma's so you can clean up the house and catch up on the things you have no time to do, Because you have 3 younger ones at home.

I mean, plan a weekend or even a Day trip, somewhere away from home ( house ) even a nice bed and Breakfast in the next County, Or a Concert or anything that you can get away together and even Fork out $50 for a decent Motel or Hotel. No stress no worries, hand holding, lingering Kisses, Sweet talks, with no emergency thoughts of " I gotta be home for Kids ".

This doesn't have to be all the time but if you want to Make Love with your wife ( Not have SEX) You may want to rekindle the Flame, the one before all the Kids ..
And maybe make a Date Night once a month or whatever. Even trade the Babysitting with other couples that may need a Night out .
you can afford or save up for it.

You can work hard, be tired, come home want dinner and then want Sex, so can She, if she works on top of the work of a Mom & Housekeeper and Cook & laundry, Chauffeur, ( You know the Drill ) lol.

What you should do is want to Make Love with her and have her want to Make Love with you. And that takes allot more than just a Romp in bed where you or she just have SEX !

Make each other feel the Love, The Intimacy, The Desire even with just a touch or a look or a few words like " Hey Baby, I want you, I have this ( fill in Blank ) for Friday night, all planned, all things taken care of , Lets run away for the night ".

Believe me, Women are more prone to Making Love than just having Sex. Sex can become a " Chore or Obligation " whereas, Making Love, takes participation of both involved , usually slower, more romantic and a heck of allot more " relationship" building or strengthening .