Sex drive, Major Changes!

**foxdana** · 09-04-2010 05:05 AM

Hi All, I am new to this forum, and I have read alot about people with little or no sex drive. I was one of those until 3 months ago. I have been married for 17 years and would only want sex every month or so, if I was lucky. My husband wanted it alot more than that so my compromise was to go once a week, if I could be bothered. It sounds horrible, but it was such an effort to go through the whole routine.

I orgasm every time we have sex, through digital stimulation, and enjoyed sex, but it just never entered my mind.

Now 3 months ago something in my head went snap and now I can't get enough sex! I want it every day or more if I can get it. I don't know what caused this and now my husband is asking me to lay off as I am wearing his penis down to a stub! We have comprimised and now do it 4 to 5 times a week.

Has anyone experienced this? It seems so strange that this change could happen so quickly and it is such a radical change.

Thanks for your imput

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 09-04-2010 05:45 AM

Welcome to the Forum.

Off course, us Australian's are awake, but others are asleep and surely therefore will answer tomorrow

I also "enjoyed sex" but wasn't full filled until now...

Surely you husband having wanted it is making that statement as a joke?

So how old are you two as from what I have read and also experience,there is a trend there that makes you more alive...

Perhaps it will help the readers therefore, if you can share your age.

CW

**foxdana** · 09-04-2010 06:03 AM

I am 36 and my husband is 43. He is enjoying the extra sex, and the wearing him to a stub is a joke, but I am wearing him out! He is willing to take care of my needs if he is too tired and then sleep, which I much appreciate! He also jokes that the shoe is on the other foot, with me wanting it more than him now, that now I know how he felt for all those years! I am happy with how things are going, but I guess I am worried that this may go back to the way it was. I don't plan to let it get to that, ever

Shell

**Mes T** · 09-04-2010 06:36 AM

Hmmmm... Have you stopped/started any medication, any change in lifestyle at all? Or maybe it's just that you've reached that age where people say women are at their "peak", if there's some credibility in that? Well in any case enjoy it, and don't worry about it leaving any time soon!

**jns** · 09-04-2010 08:09 AM

Originally Posted by foxdana

Hi All, I am new to this forum, and I have read alot about people with little or no sex drive. I was one of those until 3 months ago. I have been married for 17 years and would only want sex every month or so, if I was lucky. My husband wanted it alot more than that so my compromise was to go once a week, if I could be bothered. It sounds horrible, but it was such an effort to go through the whole routine.

I orgasm every time we have sex, through digital stimulation, and enjoyed sex, but it just never entered my mind.

Now 3 months ago something in my head went snap and now I can't get enough sex! I want it every day or more if I can get it. I don't know what caused this and now my husband is asking me to lay off as I am wearing his penis down to a stub! We have comprimised and now do it 4 to 5 times a week.

Has anyone experienced this? It seems so strange that this change could happen so quickly and it is such a radical change.

Thanks for your imput

Originally Posted by foxdana

I am 36 and my husband is 43. He is enjoying the extra sex, and the wearing him to a stub is a joke, but I am wearing him out! He is willing to take care of my needs if he is too tired and then sleep, which I much appreciate! He also jokes that the shoe is on the other foot, with me wanting it more than him now, that now I know how he felt for all those years! I am happy with how things are going, but I guess I am worried that this may go back to the way it was. I don't plan to let it get to that, ever

Shell

I'm sorry, there is a lot of difference between 4 to 5 times a week with someone who initiates and one time a week, if that , with someone who doesn't initiate. Your husband was somewhat of a saint to stand it. Now, with his libido probably somewhat down, he has everything he wanted for all those years and more. When did your libido slow down after you were married, or was it always slow? How adventurous are you both at sex? You may find that the 4 to 5 times a week is still too much for him and 2 to 3 times a week is a level he can sustain for a long time, even years. He can still pleasure you manually and orally at other times. Tease him to make him desire you more and more.

**ppenny** · 09-04-2010 08:23 AM

I know what you mean. I didn't care if I ever did have sex. But the past couple of years that is all I can think of. I get excited so easily now. I would even be asleep dreaming and wake up to an orgasm. I was really embarrassed about it. But it felt so good. I thought that something was wrong with me. It is good to know that I am not alone.

**LanaBear** · 09-04-2010 12:47 PM

Originally Posted by foxdana

Hi All, I am new to this forum, and I have read alot about people with little or no sex drive. I was one of those until 3 months ago. I have been married for 17 years and would only want sex every month or so, if I was lucky. My husband wanted it alot more than that so my compromise was to go once a week, if I could be bothered. It sounds horrible, but it was such an effort to go through the whole routine.

I orgasm every time we have sex, through digital stimulation, and enjoyed sex, but it just never entered my mind.

Now 3 months ago something in my head went snap and now I can't get enough sex! I want it every day or more if I can get it. I don't know what caused this and now my husband is asking me to lay off as I am wearing his penis down to a stub! We have comprimised and now do it 4 to 5 times a week.

Has anyone experienced this? It seems so strange that this change could happen so quickly and it is such a radical change.

Thanks for your imput

YES!!! I went through this for about 8-10 years of my marriage, it all changed about 2-3 years ago. Mine was a little more involved than just a switch, rather something I worked on and strove to change, but yes, I understand how you feel.

**foxdana** · 09-04-2010 07:03 PM

Originally Posted by jns

I'm sorry, there is a lot of difference between 4 to 5 times a week with someone who initiates and one time a week, if that , with someone who doesn't initiate. Your husband was somewhat of a saint to stand it. Now, with his libido probably somewhat down, he has everything he wanted for all those years and more. When did your libido slow down after you were married, or was it always slow? How adventurous are you both at sex? You may find that the 4 to 5 times a week is still too much for him and 2 to 3 times a week is a level he can sustain for a long time, even years. He can still pleasure you manually and orally at other times. Tease him to make him desire you more and more.

My libdo has always been rather low. I was pregnant when we got married and stayed in that mode for about 5 years!
We are more and more adventurous with sex, I asked for anal and my husband nearly had a stroke! It was something I would never consider before, but something he always wanted to try. We send sexy texts to each other and keep things intersting that way as well. He is loving all the extra attention, but he just thinks he is getting a bit too old for it so often!! I think he definitely isn't!

**caterpillar79** · 09-04-2010 10:51 PM

His patience paid off...lol!

I was one like you, didn't want sex, didn't initiate, and was happy just being...then, I turned 30 and things changed. It became the other way around... I'd say, it must be some "peaking" age-wise. I don't have anything to back it up, but my husband and I have a theory of how most women in their 30+ would subconsciously have this biological urge to procreate since they are nearing their menopause something like that...

Don't quote me on that, it was just a banter... Anyway, just to say, I understand you fully. Don't worry, I don't think your libido will go back down anytime soon as long as you manage extrensic and intrinsic stress well.

**Texasred** · 09-06-2010 12:28 AM

Originally Posted by foxdana

We send sexy texts to each other and keep things intersting that way as well. He is loving all the extra attention, but he just thinks he is getting a bit too old for it so often!! I think he definitely isn't!

He's certainly not "too old" to have sex just as often as you'd like it, but he just *might* have to take time to get in shape for all that extra activity! He'll need to eat right, get plenty of rest - all the things the athletes in the outdoor sports do!