My Lover Urinated on Me During Sex...PLEASE HELP!!!

**anonymous_mb77** · 09-07-2010 09:47 AM

Originally Posted by anonymous_mb77

Earlier today for the first time, the guy that I have been seeing for the past 6 months urinated on me when I was expecting him to ejaculate (as he said he was going to). Without being too graphic, I ended the event being completely drenched in and having swallowed urine. I don't know if its psychological or actual, but I feel queasy, and moreover, it is 3:32am and I cannot get to sleep from thinking about it. He says that it was an accident and he simply did not have any semen left after the first two completed rounds of sex, but it just doesn't seem physically possible to "accidentally" urinate instead of ejaculating. I feel completely ashamed and violated and don't have anyone that I would want to talk to about it. Is this somehow possible that this is an accident, and if so, how can it be avoided? Is my reaction a normal one? I feel inordinately bothered by this situation and I can't seem to settle myself about any of it. In all honesty (even though I feel that it sounds trite) I feel a little dirty and he is making it into such a "non-issue" that I feel very confused and alone. I don't even know what my question is, I would just like some knowledgeable advice, solid facts and/or helpful suggestions about any of this!

Thank you all for the responses...I really needed some counsel on this issue and was too embarrassed to go to any of my normal "listening ears". You all have really made me understand that he should have showed MUCH more contrition and delivered a much more heartfelt apology about doing something that made me feel degraded. Based on how I feel, along with the unanimous consensus of all of you (who definitely don't know me and have no bias whatsoever), I will be ending our relationship. Thank you all again for the much needed help and advice!

**WildChild** · 09-07-2010 01:06 PM

The men are telling us, it is possible to urinate with an erection so this could have been an odd sort of accident. He could be so embarrassed that he doesn't know how to handle it and so is acting like it's nothing. Sort of the ignore it and it will go away thing. You should at least sit down with him and have a talk about it.

**Hopeless Dork** · 09-07-2010 01:14 PM

You have explained its not in his character to be this way ... so I'd hold off on rushing to judgement without first explaining to him how it made you feel and what you need from him to feel better.

Most of the advice saying they would leave if this happened was dependent on how this person was treating them outside of this incident... as in was it isolated or have they always been attempting to degrade or humiliate.

If it was truly an accident, like WC said, maybe he is humiliated and doesn't know HOW he should react and is hoping to sweep it under a rug, not realizing it makes you feel humiliated that he doesn't address it.

I think you have to factor in how this man treats you in general, if he is respectful and loving and if he is possibly extending the benefit of the doubt if in your heart you believe it was very unlikely he did it on purpose.

**Mr. Inquisitive** · 09-07-2010 01:16 PM

Speaking for myself it is possible to urinate with an errection but it actually takes a little effort. If it was not a mistake I say ditch the guy. It doesn't get more disrespectful than that.

**MiddleAgedMan** · 09-07-2010 01:32 PM

Another man's view here for the ladies. It is possible to pee when erect, but it is not easy and I don't think i could do it by "accident." I usually have to pee in the middle of the nite, and almost always have an erection when I wake, but I have to let things dissipate a little first. I don't have to be limp to pee, but I can't be in the 10 o'clock position either.

**Texinator** · 09-07-2010 02:15 PM

It's difficult but possible to pee with an erection. Also, his bladder might have been so full that he couldn't hold it in any longer. But then it seems like poor judgment on his part not to use the restroom earlier.

His reaction might be one of extreme embarrassment. Some people apologize profusely..others try to act like nothing happened and hope everyone just forgets about the whole thing.

So it's possible that he really didn't do this on purpose and that he really doesn't not care, but you know him better than we do, so really only you can tell if this was an unfortunate accident or if he was being filthy and abusive.

**SaharaJim** · 09-07-2010 05:41 PM

He may well be very embarassed; but not because it was an "accident" but rather curiosity or even interest in a "fetish". If he has that "curiosity" and doesn't know how to "deal" with the fact; he may be trying to "ignor it" in hopes of it "going away". From your description I find it difficult to believe in the "accident"...why wouldn't he just pull or turn away rather than inflict this on you? I think he did do this deliberately and now wants to "disavow" any "intent'. Bad for him and for you. He really needs to "face" his actions and analyze his reactions to them. He also needs to "man up" and be "upfront" with you about what is going on. Maybe you can "accomidate" his fetish...MAYBENOT....but he should be direct with you about what is happening not some "lame excuse" about it being an accident. My opinion.

**hizenberg** · 09-07-2010 08:23 PM

was it like a huge "gush" of urine or a 'squirt'?? sorry to sound so gross,i would definateley be feeling just how you and everyone else has descibed.repulsed and degraded, maybe he is so imbarressed himself ? and not going into it with you is easier, can you somhow bring it up with him how you felt and that his response made you feel as though he had purposley done it?

**Drangel254** · 09-07-2010 10:49 PM

Idk about other guys but there is no way to accidenty . Ittakes a mon after sex to even get ready to pee , and u ave to push to pee, u don't push to cum. That dude pissed on you and told all his friends IMO.

**dr.mansview** · 09-08-2010 12:06 AM

a man can urinate with a full fledged erection, but not if that erection was the result of sexual excitement..but as pretzel said, the urinary tract closes to allow semen to pass during sex..in an excited penis, semen trumps urine..

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