A big issue I have with sex is that it hurts and it shows on my face. I don't enjoy it and he can tell. I faked it for months until I just couldn't anymore. Every so often I do want to initiate things... not often, but every so often... I just feel really self conscience about it because it hurts so much and it just must not be great for the boyfriend to look at me and see this excruciated look on my face. He always feels bad because he's hurting me and I just can't fake it anymore, I'm almost always near tears.