Help me get back into sex

**Angiegun** · 10-05-2010 08:37 PM

I am 23 years old and having serious intimacy issues. I have been with my boyfriend on and off for 7 years and we have a 3 year old together. Seems like ever since we have had our son things have gone down in the bedroom.
I am very much still in love and attracted to my man, my problem is following through. We will be playing around all day and kissing and touching but then when it comes time to have sex or oral sex I completely freeze up and don't want to be intimate anymore. Its sooo frustrating I don't know why I do it and its definetly putting a strain on our relationship.
Should I take hormones or something to enhance my sexual feelings?
Or is it something more than just hormones?
I just don't know, I know very much that I am in love with him unconditionally and I am still very attracted to him so I don';t think it has anything to do with him. It could be distractions but once we start having sex I'm just not into it, i'm enjoying it but i feel like i wanna rush through it.

Any advice you can give me would be greatly appreciated
Thanks

**jns** · 10-05-2010 08:48 PM

Does having sex cause you pain? Does it make you anxious?

**Little_Miss_Me** · 10-06-2010 09:54 AM

Do something you've never done before. And lord, get excited. It's ridiculous how you've not taken his feelings into account. Screw your hormones, will you really let them control your life?

He wants you. You're his wife. You tease him all day, then are completely flat whenever it comes to sex? That's got to be horrid for the poor man.

So, think about something you've always wanted to do. Or he's always wanted to do. Well, what a way to ignite a spark than to fulfill someone's fantasy? And if you two have fulfilled them all, then just do something out of the ordinary. I recently tried something I was -not- looking forward to. Didn't want to do it, but because the love of my life wanted it so badly, I thought I'd give it a chance. It was pleasantly surprised it was so amazing. And let me tell you, it sparked more than just a flame.

Just get an open mind. Step out of your boundaries, and remember, this is just as much for him as it is for you so don't let your hormones or any other excuse you can come up with get in the way. He's your husband, and he deserves all the passion in the world and all the willingness from you.

**Angiegun** · 10-06-2010 10:30 AM

Sex used to cause A lot of Pain, for about a year after our son. but i think now its just expected to hurt but doesn't actually. Yes I feel very anxious before we have sex.