And furthermore - now that I am talking about it - it makes me wonder if the plateau I've hit with my boyfriend doesn't contribute to my destructive thoughts. ..
I would rather, for me anyway, before I answer, for you to tell me more about the above....

Seems you are in a relationship that your not happy with, and in that, you are daydreaming and in that, you only have this as a reference for the past....

Tell me about the boyfriend, what is the plateau, what has happened, how long you've been together, and let's see if it's actually missing pieces and as such I think this is something maybe a bit different, a different direction......

CW