Thread: how do i take control

Taking control isn't just a specific act, its an attitude... its inniciating and being the naughty lil vixen you know you can be. Remind yourself that you are THE hottest thing in that bedroom Own that... let yourself feel like you are sex on a stick , that everything about you is desirable to him and let that confidence radiate from every inch of you...

From your eyes, giving him eye contact.. flirting eyes, looking him up and down...

From your mouth... part your lips, leave them open slightly, stick your tongue out a little, lick your lips occasionally..

Your tone of voice, talking dirty, saying suggestive things, complimenting his parts while giving them a little caress.. teasing basically, teasing is being in control, making him want it... etc.

You can give him a little lap dance, climb on top of him and grind your body around on him, slide yourself up and down... tease him with peeks of your body, shake your hair in his lap, rub your face against his thighs... just have fun , again teasing him..

Masturbating for him is taking control... its showing him... look what I got, look how good I feel... its seductive.

Like jns mentioned, putting your panties in his face.. kneeling over him.. thats taking some serious inniciative

Taking his hand and placing it on your body where you want to be touched, etc...

Riding him is of course an option for taking control of the situation... but so is any other position you want to do when you are the one inniciating what its going to be, its you being in control... and if thats what he wants from you... you bending over on the bed and telling him to come and get it... is taking just as much of an innicative as getting on top and riding him.

thanx hd , ur advice is priceless , my bf is away for a week i think taking control might be more fun than i thought if i dont think about it and just do it , with any luck he will be speeding home , as i hope to wind him up till he does get here , by that time i hope i will have the courage to carry out all of the promises ive made via txt and fb , and yes jns he is very up for it , hence the reason i didnt think i was doing enough for him thanx xx

I think the biggest thing that keeps women from being the seductress once in a while is fear of embarassment, fear of looking stupid or sounding or looking rediculous... once you nip that in the bud and realize that when you are talking about your man, the guy that loves you and is into you -- you really can't do wrong... at the worst case... even if you do soemthing over the top that makes you both laugh... so what... its intimate and loving even when it makes either of you giggle.

A lot of girls think... I cant dance or strip for my guy or give him a lil lap dance, I'm not a good dancer, blah blah... like with the sex... remember you are the BEST dancer in that room that when you're shaking your hips and rubbing all over him he's not going to think about whether or not your keeping in time with the music... he's going to be thinking how hot it is that he is getting a lapdance in his living room!!

Q: Has any man ever seen anything hotter or more attractive then the woman he loves naked?

A: NO.

Of course we all have fantasies, visions or whatever, butt I'm talking about reality...real life.

I have to agree with HD butt from a man's point of view. YOU ARE THE BEST in the room at whatever you are trying to do and your man appreciates it.
If he doesn't, that's a HIM problem and not a YOU problem.

Men spend most of their lives expecting to be "leaders" or "in control" or "dominate" of any/every given situation (yes, there are exceptions butt you know what I mean), so it's many man's dream to be able to be "controlled" or "lead" in the bedroom.

Woman on top is an excellent start. You control the speed, the depth, the friction, the angle, etc. You can't fail.

As HD said, if you do, it will probably lead to laughter and laughter in the bedroom is great too.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i think ive overdone it , 3hrs on fb , i asked him, tell me your fantasy babe, he said girl on girl and i wanna watch you , sexy lapdance/striptease and a home porno , and could i send a naughty pic to keep him going . probem girl on girl ive been there was good not with an audience tho, n i dont no who i would ask to help wath that dilema ,but i will try to oblige . sexy lapdance , ive got to get away from the embarrasment , when we first met i had an and body that would have given kylie cmpetition, i dont really like what i see anymore (yes im working on it ) so its hard to think he does , home porn , im not sure , is it sexy or just a man thing ?
i did send him the naughty pic tho , is tha just the same as recording our own porn ?

He sounds like he LOVES the way you look. Men aren't as fussy as we think and what turns them on more than anythbing is if their woman is sexually confident.

Home porn is sexy. He will have his own personal porn star and see you as a total sex godess. Yes, it's hard to come to terms with the fact that most of us don't look like the Barbie Dolls on what I call 'fake' porn, but I don't know a man who wouldn't prefer a real woman (especially his real woman) having a genuinely hot time rather than someone who is paid to do it.

If yr not up to the whole filiming thing yet maybe start by letting him do a sexy photo shoot with you, wear what he finds sexy on you, let him be the director. You could work up to pics of you 'entertaining yourself'. Once you've got used to seeing yourself you might have the confidence to be filmed.

It is a bit intimidating seeing yourself the first time but once you realise that its not his first time seeing you like that (only yours) and he loves it, your confidence will hopefully improve.

Go for it. As long as you can both not take it too seriously and have a bit of a giggle about it all you'll be fine. Enjoy.

thanx to you all , youve all given me sound advice ,ive got lots of confidence from your supportive words . will post again after the fact let you know how i get on xxxx