sex is less frequent than I'd like...

**scramble** · 02-24-2011 06:07 PM

My boyfriend and I have been dating about 8 months now. We started having sex a couple of months into dating, and we were doing it once every few days, but then he started having problems and had to go get his penis circumcised. Between that and having to recover, we went intercourse-less for a few months, and only about 5-6 weeks ago we started having sex again. But it's been about once every week at most. I've been wanting to do it a lot more often, especially given the dry few months...

And I usually give him a lot of physical hints that I want to have sex, but to no avail. Even on days when we have a romantic special-occasion dinner or a valentine's day weekend dinner, nothing! He fell asleep shortly after we got home even though I was pretty suggestive... It was really disappointing and I almost feel like he doesn't want to have sex with me or something... But my boyfriend is caring and romantic otherwise - he does sweet things on a daily basis, and he's been wonderful outside of this issue.

In the evenings, he usually falls asleep much before I do (he's a morning person), and in the morning, we're both busy with our morning routine. When we do have sex, as far as I can tell, he doesn't have any problems... it's been nearly three months since his circumcision, and I don't know if he's still just sensitive, or if he is just low on libido. When I mention to him how early he falls asleep all the time and how tired he is during late evenings, he just tells me that he's a morning person and that he always goes to bed early... I don't know what to say!! I also don't wanna sound like I am putting such a heavy emphasis of our relationship on how often we're having sex...

**jns** · 02-24-2011 08:04 PM

Guys don't do hints, you will have to tell him what you want. How old are the both of you? Ask him directly if the circumcision is interfering with his pleasure of sex. Why did he have to get circumcised?

**Thomas Hepburn** · 02-26-2011 02:14 AM

Circumcision to a lot of men is a form of emasculation.

**Thomas Hepburn** · 02-26-2011 02:17 AM

Circumcision, to a lot of men is a form of emasculation. In other words, he may feel less of a man. It also may still be painful anyway. Like jns says, if you want sex ask for it. You don't have to be blunt about it, but for heavens sake say what you want. Why do so many women get frustrated when men don't read their "signals" when all they need to do is talk plainly?

**Seeker_Advice** · 02-26-2011 07:05 AM

I can't speak directly about the circumcision as I was circumcised as an infant.

I can speak about the "hints' as the men above have already stated, men don't do hints or read signals (very well). So if you want us to see a line, you have to put the dots real close together...

It's unusual for a man not to want to share intimacy with the woman he loves, considering he thinks about it in his subconscious mind about every 15 seconds (according to some experts).

I would tend to believe that the "no sex" is a symptom of something else...

An uninterrupted heart to heart conversation seems to be in order, as you need to find out what's going on.

**Jimbeau** · 02-26-2011 08:35 AM

Originally Posted by Thomas Hepburn

Circumcision, to a lot of men is a form of emasculation. In other words, he may feel less of a man.

Never heard that one before. Considering probably better than 95% of men in our culture are circumcized I find it difficult to believe.

**Hopeless Dork** · 02-26-2011 09:19 AM

Originally Posted by Jimbeau

Never heard that one before. Considering probably better than 95% of men in our culture are circumcized I find it difficult to believe.

Yeah, I have never heard of it to be thought of as emasculating before either. And seeing as how he did it as an adult man, it was obviously something he wanted to do.

**Thomas Hepburn** · 02-26-2011 12:24 PM

I don't think we know that he did it out of choice. Maybe he had no option. Yes, men can feel emasculated about losing their foreskin. Babies who it was done to wouldn't feel that exact feeling, but would wonder later why it was done if there was no medical need. 95% of the USA culture are circumcised but this is not the case of the majority of men outside your country. One of the main reasons it is popular there is through Jewish influence. No European countries practice this by the way. Women would not understand the feeling of circumcision against your will. To some it is just a piece of skin. Men do not understand some feelings that women have either.

**nick1** · 02-26-2011 12:39 PM

Us guys do not take hints! Tell us up front! I know this sounds stupid but that is us.!

**WildChild** · 02-26-2011 04:56 PM

Originally Posted by Jimbeau

Never heard that one before. Considering probably better than 95% of men in our culture are circumcized I find it difficult to believe.

World wide 30 -32% of males are circumcised. In the US fewer than 60% male infants are circumcised and the over all percentage across all ages is about 79%