Thread: i may be traumatized :/....

So my boyfriends been wanting to try anal sex, and ive never been totally against it. I admit that I kind of wanted to try it too.

So last night we tried it and it last all of about a minute. We used plently of lube, and loosing my anus a little with his finger (that didnt bother me) and then we proceeded to the actual act... and it was painful as s**t

He stopped as soon I told him, but afterwards I just didnt know how to feel lol I basically curled up in a ball, he felt guilty but I assured him it wasnt his fault and that we both wanted to try it.

So for right now, anal is off my list! Even though I didn tell him we can try again one day....

Can I get anyone elses opinion on anal?

Some women really enjoy it, others don't. It needs to be done very slowly and gently the first few times, and it shouldn't be painful. If you ever try again, being completely relaxed and very aroused helps a lot. You can also use a small toy for a while and work your way up if you enjoy it.

There are some women who find it very pleasurable the very first time they try - others can never stand it. It is NOT that the women are putting up with the pain, they have just learned to relax that part of their bodies so that it isn't painful.

Apparently, something went dreadfully wrong and I am sorry to hear that it happened. What's really important is that you not allow the memory of your first experience interfere with any additional attempts. In reality, the next attempt could be a bigger challenge then the first attempt as you may have to get past your fear.

I would suggest doing a search in this forum as this subject has been talked about a lot in here and you may find some helpful hints. Like pushing out, as if you're trying to have a movement, while he is s-l-o-w-l-y pushing in...it helps. It helps to be completely relaxed too. So don't try it again until/unless you are very relaxed. LOTS of lube helps too. If you think you have used enough, use more....Since this is not an area that produces it's own lubricant, it counts on you to give it all it needs.

Based on what you've shared, I would assume that you were far from being relaxed enough to try it and either speed (too much) and/or not enough lube were used.

What helped for me was to be on top. That way I could control anything and everything that happened. I would work the tip in, get used to that by putting that in and out a few times, go down a bit deeper. I'de have to stay put for even a minute for me to get used to that depth and girth, then a little deeper get used to it etc. etc. Eventually I was able to sit right down and start some thrusting. But again, it was all me. He didnt do anything but lie there until I was fully used to it. If he is willing to wait for you to do what you need then your next experience may go better.
To reinterate: You need to have control while your gettin used to things. And lots o lube!

Originally Posted by Seeker_Advice

I would suggest doing a search in this forum as this subject has been talked about a lot in here and you may find some helpful hints. Like pushing out, as if you're trying to have a movement, while he is s-l-o-w-l-y pushing in...it helps.

I know this may sound stupid, but Im not experienced with anal at all but if Im pushing out while hes pushing in, wouldnt that cause me let a little poo slip?

and also when we tried anal, he was going very slow and I had the feeling like I needed to have a movement even though I didnt have to go