Looking for advice...

**xckx** · 03-13-2011 10:56 PM

Let me start at the beginning.

I'm a 22 year old guy and have never really posted something like this on a forum especially a womens forum, but this is the only appropriate place I can think of to ask a question and/or advice for my situation. So here goes...

Recently I was employed at a sporting goods store. It is run by 4 women (I don't know their ages but I'm sure they are at least 35-40). They needed extra help for a store conversion and inventory among other things. So far I have been there for about 1 month. In this time I had gotten to know all the women quite well, and they had gotten to know me. At first, I thought there may have been some awkwardness working with 4 mature women but they seem quite comfortable with me. Heres where it gets a bit more interesting...

1 of the 4 women is very attractive. Or at least, I find her attractive. Normally, I would just leave it at that. But... This sort of thing has never happened to me before so I'm not sure what to be looking for but if I wasn't mistaken, I think she flirts with me. She always smiles jokes around with me, she asks me to help her a lot, she tells me I have a pretty face, and sometimes she puts herself in positions where I think she wants me to look at her.

Is it normal for a woman to do these sort of things or am I just be flattering myself, or does she want me to do anything? I would hate to bring something like this up to her only to find out I was totally wrong and just embarrass both ourselves. What should I do?

Thanks for reading.

**WildChild** · 03-14-2011 12:30 AM

She may be flirting. She may be interested. But that can be difficult to gage with this much information. Getting involved with a boss is always an iffy thing. Be freindly, helpful and responsive. And careful. If you really want to go somewhere with this, let her lead. If you want to keep the job, really think this through.

**stressed** · 03-14-2011 02:18 AM

You should leave it up to her if you are interested. But being interested in her has nothing to offer you other than trouble because she's one of 4 bosses and it's very likely the other 3 will find out and women can be very competitive/jealous about such issues.

If you need the job you don't have much to gain from it other than leading you to feel awkward at work or, at worse, get fired by the other 3. Also, since you find her attractive it's likely you misinterpret her words and behavior into her finding you attractive as well. Give it more time to understand the situation.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 03-14-2011 02:30 AM

You've heard of a COUGAR

It is nice at that age, to flirt with someone your age, and actually get attention back, no matter what that attention is and in general, I have to agree with WC, you've only had this job 1 month, if an older woman interests you trust me, there are many around that would welcome youth and innocence as a variety and change.

You know what you haven't thought of, falling for someone like that...It seriously happens and when they realise the age difference, and what they are doing they break your heart, not saying she is like that at all, as again WC stated it's hard to gage...

CW

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 03-14-2011 03:52 PM

bumping...........

**xckx** · 03-14-2011 04:42 PM

Thank you for replying everyone, the insight it quite helpful. My work here is merely temporary and don't expect to be employed here for a long time. When my work is finished I suppose I will move on. However for the time being, I think I might just play it safe and see what she decides to do next. I'm not going to lie, I'm a young guy with pretty strong hormones right now... If some woman is flirting with me like this, even if she is almost twice my age, I am very turned on about the whole idea and wouldn't stop her if he decides to do something drastic o_o

Does this make me a bad person?

**Texasred** · 03-15-2011 02:15 PM

Originally Posted by xckx

...I'm not going to lie, I'm a young guy with pretty strong hormones right now... If some woman is flirting with me like this, even if she is almost twice my age, I am very turned on about the whole idea and wouldn't stop her if he decides to do something drastic o_o

Does this make me a bad person?

Does following up on this make you a bad person?
Not just "No," but "(Expletive Deleted) no!"
You're an adult, she's an adult, and if you enter into a "relationship" of whatever duration, whether it's measured in hours or in years, and you do so willingly - not because she's your boss and might fire you if you turned her down! - What can be wrong with that?
You might find, in fact, that she could teach you a thing or two (or three, or four...) that future lovers would greatly appreciate your knowing.
She may only be flirting with you now because she's uncertain of your reaction to any more direct advances. If you are genuinely interested in her, you could make a very cautious move - cautious in case you have misjudged her flirting - and ask her to meet you after work for a cup of coffee, a beer, or a snack at a local restaurant; you could say you're enjoying talking to her and you hate to quit just because the work day is over. If she accepts, being able to talk with her more privately, away from your work environment should give you a better idea if she has a greater interest than just kidding around at work.
Just be very careful not to let anyone else at work overhear you inviting her. Also be very careful not to tell anyone else at work about this, nor tell any of your buddies who might know someone who works there.
- TR
PS: The only real risk I see here is that, once you have made love with a woman in her 30s (or older), you'll never want to waste your time with girls your own age again!

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