Thread: how painful is anal?

Ok. Ladies, here's my dilema. My husband and i have been married for almost 4 yrs. this aug. however he keeps begging me and bothering me to have anal sex with him. We have tried it once or twice but it hurt alot and i pushed him away. I don't even let him penetrate me cuz it hurts to much...some woman say only the first time hurts and than u feel pleasure however others say it always hurts........ joking around i've told my husband that i'll let him have anal sex with me the day that he lets me put a broom stick up his .... however i think that joke is getting old and he's really serious about "doing me from behind" im really scared of pain so can anyone give me any adivice?

It is painful at first, after a minute you relax and it does not hurt. It would be better for you to be on top that way you are in control of the pressure and speed. Use plenty of lube and go slow at first it won't be to bad.

My husband and I have anal about once a month, that is enough for me! I get no pleasure out of it but he gets so much pleasure that I don't mind once in a while. He does things for me he does'nt enjoy and marriage is a compromise so give it another try. If you still hate it or it is to painful have a limit like once a month to keep him happy.

thank you karale, i will take your advice under consideration. My husband is the same way he does things to please so i should do something to please him.. thanx again.

I have tried it several times. At first it hurt like no tomorrow, and I could not even stand penetration. After awhile, it actually is very pleasurable. I chosae to be bent over on the floor on my knees, so i could control the penetration. my husband was very, very loving and respectful to my feelings and just relaxed and let me control the speed and preasure. We chose to use baby oil on him and on me, which seemed alot better. Another prduct you can try is "Anal Eeze". You can find this at an adult shop. It actually has lidocane in it to help ease the pain.

It doesn't hurt at all if it's well done. I've practiced it lots of times, and my husband knows how to do it, and both enjoy.

First, you have to dilate the hole. There are dildos specially made for this, that are thin in one side and more thik on the other. With this and lots of lub, the hole can be ready for penetration.

No way you should do penetration without dilating the hole first, becuase it would hurt like and sure you won't repeat. But if you try the way I told you, you will see that there's not pain at all, but lots of pleasure.

Anal can hurt if you don't work up to it. For some it takes weeks of working up to the actual act with toys and fingers gradually getting bigger.

Some people will never be able to do anal. They are just physically not going to like it. It really depends on the person. If you do not enjoy it then don't do it. Explain that some people are never able to do anal and he will just have to deal with that. If you really want to I suggest taking lots of time to work your way up in sizes of toys and etc to prepare. You cannot just go right into it.

I know a lot of people like Anal Eeze, but it is a bad idea, really. Pain is your body's way of saying "wait, this isn't right, you're injuring yourself" and with the lidocaine in Anal Eeze you won't be able to feel damage being done until it's too late.

Take it slow. Start off with fingers, work up to small toys, work up to larger toys, THEN go for the whole thing. Use lots of lube, and lots of patience. If you feel pain, stop and go back to playing.


That being said, I don't really enjoy it myself, and luckily my partner's not into it. Some people just don't enjoy it. It's okay to not like it or want to do it!

I agree with some of the previous posters on how it shouldn't hurt if it's done right. You need to work your way up. Start out using small toys and take baby steps. My boyfriend and I do it all the time and we both enjoy it. Also, make sure when you are ready to maybe try a little foreplay to get you both warmed up. And lots of lube!

Best wishes!

Definatly work up to it. My husband and I do it every now and again, but it always takes a bit for me to "warm up" enough for him to actually penetrate. I'd suggest starting out with some anal play with fingers, small toys, etc first. And LOTS of lube. Have him start out slow so you can relax, when you tense up it makes things much more uncomfortable. And make sure he understands that if at any time you say "Stop!" to immediatly stop. I sound like a drill sargent sometimes when we haven't done it in awhile, yelling out things like "slower!" "wait!" "that's too much!" haha. But I find it quite enjoyable, it's a nice change of pace sometimes.

my man wants that too. Every once in a while i let him put a finger up there or the vibrator. u have to work ur way up to it and use alot of lube. He will probley just be excited about getting something up there. it is uncomfortable at first but i get off knowing he is getting off on it....