Thread: I am sure there have been a lot of these, but I can't orgasm.

I'm eighteen, pretty healthy, I have gotten the implanon birth control but I have had the problem before it. I have never had an orgasm through sexual intercourse or masturbation.

My sexual past:
I lost my virginity a summer ago, it was a one night stand with an ex. I just wanted to get sex out of the way.
My second time was with someone who I thought was friend but humiliated me due to my lack of knowledge (actually I asked why he wanted me turn around and he assumed I didn't know about doggy style) .
Third time was with another friend, let's just say it was weird.
The rest (only like three times) was with the person I lost my virginity too.

Every time I have had sex it has hurt and I never really get wet. There are times where I have been turned on and gotten moist (hate that word) but for the most part when I masturbate or have sex I don't get to wet and it seems like it's hard to be penetrated (couldn't think of how to phrase that).

I have had some sexual trauma (not rape just being touched by an adult) and I do have self esteem issues. So it may be psychological.

I'm just not sure what to do, can anyone help?

Dont worry about the guys you have been with- if they didn't make sure you were wet first then they were probably inexperienced. Anybody who who berates someone for lack of experience is insecure.

Probably best if you master masturbation first- google clitical-a good how to site.

Yeah, it's not very pleasurable if you're not very aroused. I'm not sure about your past relationships, but you described them as friends so I'm not sure how into them you were. Love can make a big difference. I know that when my boyfriend touches me it's leaps and bounds away from masturbating. It doesn't seem like you have a problem, just inexperience which can be remedied. If after trying Oxy-morons suggestion you still feel like you have a problem you could try vibrators.

Oxy-moron is right though. Those guys didn't know what they were doing either if they didn't have the good sense to arouse you first.

I do own and use a vibrator and it does feel good but I never really get wet and I still don't orgasm. It feels like it's building up then the feeling goes away, I'm not sure why. I've tried different things like holding it in the same position or changing positions and different movements.

Hi
In that case try a vibrating back massager- First time use it with panties on and keep it moving. Be wary of becoming addicted to mechanical arousal as your only source of coming.
The other thing that you could look at is something like cutting back on sugar in your diet. There is also a cheap herb called Muira Puama that might be worth a try.