Hello Everyone,

I'm a guy, looking for some advice about my girlfriend, and I figured I'd likely get much better advice here than on a mens advice forum, I hope you don't mind me posting here? Feel free to send me packing if it's not the done thing.

I've been in a relationship with my other half for just over 2 years, and if I'm honest, satisfying her sexually has always been a challenge, however, one I've rather relished.

She tells me that she's always had issues achieving orgasms, and for many years in a previous relationship didn't at all. However, I made sure to always go the extra mile to ensure that she was satisfied, completely selflessly, and I got a real kick out of it, and for the most part it worked really great, we've both enjoyed ourselves.

I think the problem is that this feels like it's very much turned into a one-sided give/take situation, where I'm no longer getting much out of it in return, because we both have to put SO much effort into satisfying her, and this is having a negative effect on both of us.

I've been trying to understand why she has such a hard time reaching climax, she doesn't seem to know herself. I'm pretty sure it's not physiological as she's a perfectly fit and healthy young woman. My guess is that it must psychological, is that presumptuous of me?

She seems to have a very short attention span, or her mind isn't in the game, she's always been distracted by things other than the sex, faffing and worrying about them, things like how the pillows are arranged behind her, constantly fiddling with them, how high or low she's laying, if the lights are on or off, is the window open, are we making too much noise, does she look fat etc etc

The problem is that I no longer relish the challenge, I actually find this all deflating, it's a knock on my self-esteem and becoming quite tiring. As a man it's important to me to be able to completely satisfy my partner, and I'm sure I'm not a bad lover, certainly not for a lack of trying anyway.

Do any of your suffer from similar issues to my other half? or have a similar dynamic in your relationships?

My concern with raising my worries with her too much is that I don't want to further knock her confidence and risk making the problem even worse.

I'd appreciate your thoughts.

Thank you.