miserable mom

I'm 24 with three kids from my boyfriend of nine years, well anyways our sex life is okay, sometimes its kind of boring cause my boyfriend thinks more about his own satisfaction than mine. He rarely takes his time with foreplay and oral sex, its mostly me thats the one giving. Anyways I have been wanting to have sex with a woman, just to try it out and see what its like. I know if I brought this up to my boyfriend he wouldn't mind, but I just don't want him to suggest threesome cause I'm not really comfortable with that. I don't want to see him have intercourse with another woman and feel insecure watching him get off on another girl. So I just want to know how can I go about this? How do I find someone who is willing? I don't want to try this with any friends, I just want a one time thing. Any suggestions? Is this weird? I'm kind of embarrassed to bring this up, but I would just like some advise or suggestions from any women that have tried it. Thanks!

nicky2007

hey, no its not strange at all, we all need to spice are sex life up a bit every now and then. know exactly what you mean about been insecure bout seeing him with another women, am the same, but like your patner my bf doesnt mind me doing stuff, and when we did it he just did stuff to me and me and the girl did stuff (was good beingcentre of attention) theres lots of adult/swingers website on the internet, however, there are some strange people out there, and alot of time wasters. when i did it my partner knew a girl who was willing, but i do go on the website, just havnt met anyone off them yet. just be carful and make sure you and your parnter both know whta you feel comfotable with. but if youve got the money you could always use an escort with the added bonus there experienced!

miserable mom

Thanks for responding back, well I think I might get insecure just thinking maybe he thinks her body is better, maybe she feels better to him, you know what I mean? I get mad thinking of my boyfriend being with another woman, I'm afraid it might bother me too much. Anyways I don't know I guess I'm just curious, I've made out with a friend and did a little bit of touching but nothing more than that. We were in a car and my boyfriend was the one driving while me and her were in the back, he knew what was going on and was trying to look in the rearview mirror but he said he missed it. LOl he didn't mind at all, I guess I just have to talk to him about it first. The thing is I don't go on the internet and I'm afraid of doing something with the wrong person. Escorts well thats not really an option, I'm not to fond of paying someone all kinds of money for sex, although it might be safer only cause they are proffessionals. I don't know! So confused

aschne02

I would not suggest using anyone off the internet nor an escort. If you don't know anyone personally interested (which may not be a good idea as well) you could try going to a gay/lesbian bar. From experience it's easier to do the whole thing with someone that is experienced with it rather then getting another person that is new to it as well. Going to a gay/lesbian bar can kind of break the ice and make you a little more confortable with the whole situation. I suggested to my husband that for the first time he could watch and of there was a second time he could possibly join in but there would be guidelines. I feel the same way as you do about the whole him liking her more, or her being hotter then me and so on. like i said going to a gay/lesbian bar will make you a little more confortable about it.

miserable mom

Yeah I was thinking the same thing, the internet there's too much psychos, a gay bar would be reasonable. I think if I tried it with a friend it would be a little awkard and the friendship my change. Also if I do decide to do what you said, just me and the girl with my boyfriend watching, I wouldn't want a friend to try stuff on my boyfriend behind my back afterwards. Is that stupid to think like that? I don't think so! I've already had a close friend of mine flirt with my boyfriend, so I don't really trust alot of girls. At least if I go with a lesbian she might not be interested in going after my boyfriend later. I don't know if this stupid thinking but I tend to anaylze the situation and my mind kind of wonders to other possibilities, in other words before anything takes place I would rather be cautious.

aschne02

No it's not stupid to think that at all. Everyone I know always says I over analyze things but I think better safe then sorry. The friend thing was just a thought; I kind of think the same thing. And also using a friend may spread some rumors or facts to people you don't want knowing. Best bet is to just get comfortable with the idea and ease yourself into it all. I can't really think of a better idea then just associating yourself with lesbians. You would be surprised how many are out there that love experimenting.

miserable mom

Well I finally brought this up to my boyfriend yesterday, I kind of just blurted it out. I told him I was interested in having sex with another woman, and asked him if he minded. He told me no then asked me what he was going to do. I told him the same thing that I guess you worked out with your boyfriend, I told him he could watch and do things to me but that I didn't want him having sex or anthing with the girl. He said that was fine and that I called the shots. So that made me feel a lot better. So we'll see what happens. I think your right though experimenting with lesbians would probably make me feel more comfortable. But you know whats weird is that when we were talking about it he said I don't care if thats what you want to do, I just want to be there. So I said ok thats understandable but than he said if I want to do anything sexual with anybody its okay as long as he's there. What the does that mean? I didn't ask although I should have, I was just wondering "would he really be okay with me *******another man? It was weird cause he always seemed really jelous. But anyways I guess I got the ok lol. Now I just have to find the right person. Aschne02 when you experimented yourself how did that go? I mean how did the other woman handle it? Did she basically just put the moves on you first? I don't know how I'm going to approach the situation. How do you just go on and bring it to someone? I'm more confused on how I would get another girl to go along with it, how do you know if someone is interested? I know this is a lot of questions and I really don't mean to bug, but you've been helpful. I just want advice on a good way to approach somebody to see if their interested.