I know how to spice things up, Just dont know if Im confortable with it.

**PinkySweet** · 08-06-2011 07:38 PM

My fiance has never complained about our sex life needing "Spice" thats probably because anytime we think of something new or see something we might like, we usually go ahead and try it. So we do have alot of fun, like the first time we tried role playing(doctor and patient) we enjoyed it even though we were laughing the whole time.

I would say our relationship is great, we know how to communicate about our problems and we do have our little fusses but we resolve them. Ive always been the one to have a harder time communicating though, I do work very hard on trying to be a better communicater with him. So now we get down to the problem.

He's coming to get me and Im going to spend a few days with him at his house. He loves doing dirty things in public, as do I. I do worry about getting caught though. He let me in on something he wanted to try this next time he comes to get me. Before we leave my house he likes to be "teased" So he wants me to bend over and let him have a couple strokes from the back and stop him and let him finish when he gets home

... So while were driving back to his house(30-40 minute drive) He wants me to stroke and suck his ya know(I have no problem with that, Ive done it before) but afterwards he wants me to stop and play with myself the rest the way back to his house, Now thats what I have a problem with.

Ive never felt uncomfortable with him, but for some reason when I think about playing with myself infront of him, I just get a akward feeling? I would like to be able to do this for him, cause I know its one of his little fantasizes, but I dont know if Im going to be able to be over the akward feeling enough to be able to be aroused.

Any help guys?

**jns** · 08-06-2011 08:17 PM

Ask him if the playing with yourself can wait for another time. Masturbation can be very intimate for the person doing it on them self. Try to overcome the self-consciousness that you feel by doing it in front of him while enjoying an intimate moment in the bedroom. Continue doing that from time to time until you feel comfortable. Then slowly take it out of the bedroom to other places where you are comfortable and not worried about someone else seeing. Finally, after enough time to become comfortable doing the masturbation in many places, start do it where you could be seen or caught. That is if you want to do it. Otherwise tell him that is a no-go.

**Mes T** · 08-06-2011 11:19 PM

Not to be a buzz-kill but for what it's worth, I think doing any of this stuff while one of you is driving is a terrible idea. I don't see how it can be arousing to know that you might be distracted just long enough to run someone over or crash into someone. I think it's irresponsible, and is right up there with texting, talking on the phone, etc.

*takes off motherly hat*

Anyway, I really like what jns posted and agree. If you haven't done something in front of him like masturbating, maybe the first time you do it could be in the bedroom, in familiar surroundings, etc. That's IF you want to.

I'm sure he'll understand. We've all got our limits, or things that just take a little time to get over.

**Crystalblue** · 08-06-2011 11:55 PM

I agree with Jns also. Working your comfort level up slowly seems like the best way to go, and if you're not comfortable, you're not. The only thing I would add about doing that in the car, take quiet backstreets that would have a slow speed limit and little to no traffic, and maybe do this at night so you have a feeling of privacy.