Thread: Questions about my husband

Celebrate and Rejoice in all that you have and don't sweat the stuff you can't explain. It's okay. I would be willing to bet that it is more hormone related than anything. Perhaps you are so overwhelmed with joy that good lovemaking is the crescendo.

Try not to enter here with any preconceived notions of what anyone is going to think or type, as most are not true.

This is a unique site that is monitored closely by some magnifcent volunteers and they do a great job of keeping the "bottom feeders" out.

It took me what felt like forever to stop crying at random after having my son. At least you've got a reason! You're not alone, and it's perfectly normal.

Thank you all for being so kind and honest with me. I appreciate all the advice. I look forward to getting to know all of you on this forum :-) Have a great day!

I have a problem with sex sometimes. I like it hard and rough. We do make love when when are in the mood, but I am always horny and always want to do it rough and hard. My husband doesn't always like to do it that way. As I said, we have a healthy sexual relationship, but sometimes I want more and I want sex all the time. When he isn't in the mood, I masturbate, but I never feel satisfied. I hate it. I haven't talked to a doctor about it because I feel embarrassed. I love sex. I love the feeling of being sexually satisfied. Is that normal? My husband take a long time to cum. It doesn't bother me at all because a lot of men cum fast. My husband NEVER had that problem EVER! But sometimes, when we are tired and have sex after the baby goes to sleep, he just does it to please me, but sometimes he doesn't give it his all...

I am going to tell you something that I don't often tell people. I was molested by my "Step"grandfather when I was young. After that I had a problem letting anyone touch me, which is probably why me and my husband are close and when we first started dating, he never pressured me to lose my virginity. We were both virgins. It took a long time for me to feel comfortable letting him see me naked and for him to touch me etc. Now, I have a problem with oral sex. Its very hard for me to let him do that to me. I trust him with everything, and I know he wont hurt me, but for some reason, when I start to enjoy it, I start to freak out. I give him oral sex no problem, but when it comes to me, I get scared.

Do you think that me being molested is the reason I can't receive oral sex? Also why I am sometimes not satisfied with sex? I just need opinions. Thanks :-)

It sounds like there are some sexual compatibility issues. However, I'd venture to guess based on what I've seen in life and here at WH, that alot of relationships have some compatibility issues in the bedroom. It sounds to me like you're not being satisfied by the encounter, and it leaves you with an itch that needs scratching. Have you tried to see if you can meet him in the middle a bit as far as what he likes and what you like? It doesn't always have to be hard and rough. And it doesn't have to be super soft and slow. It can be somewhere in between.

As for the oral, if this is something that was used against you in your abuse, then yes I can most definitely understand why that causes you some grief. I would highly recommend working through that. Find a way to "graduate" to it. Perhaps start with letting him just kiss you there. Eventually, let him lick ...and then you know the rest. If him making eye contact with you during is an issue (that makes some women uncomfy even if they've never been abused), put a pillow on your chest, blocking your view of him. You're missing out on something that can be very very satisfying.

Thank you. Him and I are very happy together, especially during sex, but sometimes I need more you know? We both want to go to counseling so he can understand what I am going through in terms with me being molested and I want to learn how to overcome my "oral sex" fear. I heard it is very satisfying :-) Thanks for your support :-)