Have you experienced a sort of sexual awakening? if so how did you do it?

**marcopoly** · 09-08-2011 02:08 PM

I wanted to start this with the purpose of finding out about other's experiences on this issue...for example:

1. How was your sex life before the awakening?
2. How is today your sex life?
3. What did you do or experience that help you with that change?
4. what are your plans to keep this new exciting part of your life strong and going?

My answers:

1. wife very conservative, sex only every other day, bjs only once a week (if) and never finishing in mouth or anywhere in her body, No much of foreplay, no sex toys what so ever, no talk of sex (every time I talk she would show me her face of disgust), needles to say, that I felt not very much wanted, sexy or desire....felt that I was losing so much in this life.....

2. amazing, can't stop smiling, every night is sex night....last week she has have with the magic wand (every night) at least one intense orgasm before, we finished with making crazy hard love, or she attacks my penis that I just can hold it in no more than 2 minutes before looks like is a horse that is shooting (we call it my white rain)
We do it all....anal, analingus, cunnilingus, sex toys with a lot of fingering gspot massage, deep wet kissing is also nice, etc.

3. Communication away from kids and work - only about us how we feel, education, pull out all about marriage statistics, their problems etc, I introduce her to the idea of we are the result of our experiences so we can change if we want to a certain level, when she understood this, looked at her family and then looked at my and understood that the way I feel and need to experience love is just there for us to enjoy life and feel closer together, she little by little started to relax and give herself to me.....my life now is so happy that no matter what life through at us, we'll stay together and keep moving forward...all thanks to this unbelievable connection.

4. everyday, I send her emails telling her how much I enjoy the night before, and what I would like to do to her tonight - not always happened (rarely) but is hot telling her my dirty minds secrets - we now have that confidence - she no longer looked at me with disgust because of my sexual thoughts now she understand that it is not my fault - I am just a man....and man are sexual visual beings....
I want to give her a gspot orgasms so I am working to find it, I want for her to ejaculate to the roof - we are working on it, I want for her to cum when having anal, we are working on it, etc

In conclusion, wanted to share with you some of what has been the 360 degrees change in our lives, I am still astonished of how she started to think more about sex, now she shaved (started to do it in her 40s), first time I masturbated to a finish, I am pretty sure that was a super important day for her....

I hope for all the couples out there that really but really love each other, we could end up like us having the best time of your lives.....

**marcopoly** · 09-09-2011 12:28 PM

Nobody?.....

**jns** · 09-10-2011 06:05 PM

It must be you are one of the luck few. Unfortunately for many, finding what they are looking for is done with another partner.

**ItsASecret** · 09-10-2011 06:40 PM

I would not say I have had an "awakening" but I have progressed a lot from when I first started having sex.

At first I was the type that only wanted sex with the lights out, no staring at my body, I will not give you a show of a part of my body, did not like oral giving oral nor did I like if he watched me give it, the basic positions were all I would allow at first, nothing kinky, nothing in public, nothing out there sexually....that was pretty much a summary of when I first started to have sex. I was basically very nervous and extremely reserved about my body.

Now, I can have sex in the mid afternoon with the curtains open. I can lay on the bed with him on the other end and rub myself as a "show" (I will not get theatrical with moans and eye contact or flipping my hair) but he is allowed to watch me. I can give oral no problem, I will not make eye contact but he is freely allowed to watch now without me feeling nervous. We can try any position now as long as I can physically do it, I am not flexible in any way shape or form but we still try some stuff and it does hurt but I will at least give it a go. He can look at any part of my body, though looking between my legs still gets me nervous because I am physically not the way the average vagina looks. He has tied me up, blind folded me, used toys. I like to buy and wear lingerie like corsets from Victoria's Secret and garter belt/stockings...I never liked that stuff before. I won't have sex directly in public but I have given oral in the vehicle during a roadtrip and I will flash my boobs to him if we are camping or whatever. I do not dirty talk but I am fine if my bf says things, I am again not theatrical so I do not like that style of sex because it just feels too fake if I do say stuff.

Overall I have come a long way, I can still do more things no doubt but I am happy with the progress I have made over time. I do not believe in the "open your spirit and soul" stuff so I cannot have that sort of effect in the bedroom but I do enjoy spending time with my bf and continually try to do things that I may have not done when we first started with sex.

**Elanor-Jane** · 09-11-2011 11:15 PM

Yeah not so much awakening as just general growth.
As with everything the older u get the more comfortable you are with trying new things.

Why does your wife do anal if it doesn't make her come? Sounds a little defunct, if it's not a turn on it won't make u come...just wondering as for me if it's not feeling awesome it's not being done right. Are u or her rubbing her clit before and during penetration? It sounds as though she is simply doing anal for your sake and that sorta sucks dude. If you can tell me what your process is (without sounding like Taos/Fabio) maybe u can get some pointers for it. I would hate anal without it being uber pleasing. After I've come if my bf keeps going it feels SO WRONG. So we try to time it so we come together. Only if you've had something moving around up there could u sympathize. I just want to make sure your doing everything possible so your wife gets something out of it.

**marcopoly** · 09-13-2011 08:28 AM

Originally Posted by ItsASecret

I would not say I have had an "awakening" but I have progressed a lot from when I first started having sex.

At first I was the type that only wanted sex with the lights out, no staring at my body, I will not give you a show of a part of my body, did not like oral giving oral nor did I like if he watched me give it, the basic positions were all I would allow at first, nothing kinky, nothing in public, nothing out there sexually....that was pretty much a summary of when I first started to have sex. I was basically very nervous and extremely reserved about my body.

Now, I can have sex in the mid afternoon with the curtains open. I can lay on the bed with him on the other end and rub myself as a "show" (I will not get theatrical with moans and eye contact or flipping my hair) but he is allowed to watch me. I can give oral no problem, I will not make eye contact but he is freely allowed to watch now without me feeling nervous. We can try any position now as long as I can physically do it, I am not flexible in any way shape or form but we still try some stuff and it does hurt but I will at least give it a go. He can look at any part of my body, though looking between my legs still gets me nervous because I am physically not the way the average vagina looks. He has tied me up, blind folded me, used toys. I like to buy and wear lingerie like corsets from Victoria's Secret and garter belt/stockings...I never liked that stuff before. I won't have sex directly in public but I have given oral in the vehicle during a roadtrip and I will flash my boobs to him if we are camping or whatever. I do not dirty talk but I am fine if my bf says things, I am again not theatrical so I do not like that style of sex because it just feels too fake if I do say stuff.

Overall I have come a long way, I can still do more things no doubt but I am happy with the progress I have made over time. I do not believe in the "open your spirit and soul" stuff so I cannot have that sort of effect in the bedroom but I do enjoy spending time with my bf and continually try to do things that I may have not done when we first started with sex.

Good for your, that is beautiful...You'll enjoy life very much....sex is okay, is part of being human...we deal with so much pain that being able to actually enjoy sex without inhibitions is a very good way to live life...

**marcopoly** · 09-13-2011 08:32 AM

Originally Posted by Elanor-Jane

Yeah not so much awakening as just general growth.
As with everything the older u get the more comfortable you are with trying new things.

Why does your wife do anal if it doesn't make her come? Sounds a little defunct, if it's not a turn on it won't make u come...just wondering as for me if it's not feeling awesome it's not being done right. Are u or her rubbing her clit before and during penetration? It sounds as though she is simply doing anal for your sake and that sorta sucks dude. If you can tell me what your process is (without sounding like Taos/Fabio) maybe u can get some pointers for it. I would hate anal without it being uber pleasing. After I've come if my bf keeps going it feels SO WRONG. So we try to time it so we come together. Only if you've had something moving around up there could u sympathize. I just want to make sure your doing everything possible so your wife gets something out of it.

No worries, anal only follows after she is had her big "O"...only after, she'll let me do it...when happens, she actually enjoys it....I use a dildo in her vagina while pushing my penis little by little...last time we did it, she pushed it in......she doesnt' orgasms from it, because I am not able to hold it for too long (too exited already), so it is basically for me to cum.....maybe in the future, things happen in such a way that she can fully relax and stop feeling pressure / pain.....don't take me wrong, for me is zero fun if she doesnt enjoy it as well.....