lacking sex drive

**boxergirl** · 10-14-2011 12:57 PM

Hi! I'm new to the forum but am in a (somewhat terrible) situation. I literally never want to have sex! I've been married for only a year and it's been like this most of our relationship. When I was younger I loved sex yet could not have an orgasm. My husband is the first one who I could actually have lots of orgasms with (when we were first dating). After a few months I found out I had HPV (at the same time my grandma died and I was really stressed over school). I never even wanted to hear about sex after that. Now (almost 2 years later), I am a lot happier with hardly any stress yet still don't want to have sex! I give in to my husband at least once a month yet now it HURTS so bad when we have intercourse! Any solutions or ideas of what's going on?

**sp346** · 10-21-2011 12:41 PM

I would suggest you so see a sex therapist, or a doctor that deals with sexual health issues. Most doctors don't know how to handle this issue and can actually end up making you feel worst, so go see a specialist. There is a disorder called Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder. Basically you have a low sex drive for no physical reason. Sounds like you may have this.

**jns** · 10-24-2011 09:45 AM

Maybe a psychologist could help. Because you don't get pleasure from sex, your body doesn't prepare for intercourse. That causes the pain, even with a lot of lubrication. Did your husband get you to orgasm with oral sex? HPV can cause oral cancer so I assume that caused him to forgo oral sex on you. He possibly could get a vaccination for your type of HPV. What type of HPV do you have?

**Beautiful Disaster** · 10-25-2011 09:53 AM

Do you take birth control? If so, what kind and how long have you been on it?

**Little_Man_in_the_Boat** · 10-27-2011 12:22 AM

You need to get over feeling dirty about HPV, apparently its so common now that doctors just think everybody has it.

There are over 100+ types, you should only be concerned if you have types, 18, 16 and not sure of the other ones are.

Also in this group is hand warts and feet warts.

So yeah its very common and getting more common in avery age group.

I read years ago that in the gay community in the U.S (I think it was from memory) there was only .6 percent that DONT HAVE some type of HPV.

I think also statistically you only have to have 1.5 partners and you got it.

With these kinds of stats what hope does the average person really have of not getting HPV or some other type of STi in there life unless they are both virgins and neither of their parents have any kind of STi.

If its painful intercourse its poor technique maybe its at worst vaginismus (involuntary tightness) reasonably serious condition which hopefully can be overcome or best dysparunia (badly mated[poor rough technique]).