Thread: My Husband and Porn.

i hope im putting this in the right room. Some Background to help the question.

My husband and i have sex as much as our schedules allow us. i work long day hours and he is military. he is currently on night shift for 12 hr shifts so sex is kinda when we can right now.


I know he watches porn when we cant do anything and im fine with that, but I recently found out he watches types porn im not use to guys watching and it makes me feel like im not good enough. He told me i was crazy. Ok fine. well the other night i found out that even on the nights we have sex he will sometimes go watch porn a couple hrs after and get him self off again. I was so pissed..really? do i not do enough? Is this normal? does anyone eles significant other do this? he said he will do it out of boredom if he is is up on a night shift but home early.

I know exactly how you feel! My husband will go two weeks without having sex with me, and when I check the computer history I see he's watched porn 8 of those 14 days! He also claims it's because he's bored. But when I walk in on him whack it he tells me to leave the room!! He's military also. I wish I could offer advice, but I just wanted to let you know someone else is in the same boat as you.

i dont know which is worse! being ignored for porn or what my husband does, and jerk it like 2 or 3 hrs after having sex with me while im sleeping! im trying to get over and just ignor it but it bothers me and he just doesnt understand why.

Does he maybe think that since you're sleeping it would be inappropriate to wake you? How would you feel about him waking you after you're asleep because he was horny again?

I've even told my husband to wake me up if he's horny. My husband will literally whack it while I'm gone to the store for 20 minutes. Or he'll go into the bedroom and say he's studying, but he's really looking at porn.

I totally understand where you are coming from. I have been married 8 years. My husband doesn't watch porn. He views nude pictures of women. It aggravates the heck out of me. I have talked to him about it and like everyone else's husband's he says he is bored. Personally I think it's an addiction for men. No matter what they have in front of them; they think the grass is greener. My husband says it's not me. I look at it this way.. At least he is at home and not at a strip club somewhere.

Don't take your partner watching porn personally. It has nothing to do with you satisfying him sexually. Its just another type of fantasy. Actually, straight men watching gay porn is very common. Just shows you how fantasies can be very far from reality. That's why they are called fantasies. I am sure you fantasize about other men like lets say Brat Pit that most likely you never will have sex with, even if you had the opportunity, since you are already in a relationship. Its just fantasy. Also, different people like difference types of sexual excitement. Its not that you aren't doing enough, its just he likes other stuff as well.

If it bothers you so much, talk to him about it. Maybe you can enjoy the porn together or maybe you can act out some of the porn fantasies. Does his watching porn reduce your sexual satisfaction or interfer in your's and his life? If not, then what's the harm.

Honestly, I don't see a problem with porn. I watch porn. My husband watches porn. It doesn't mean either of us doesn't satisfy the other. It's possible that he doesn't wake you because the "work" is too much . I know that I wouldn't be happy being woken to just be poked. I also know that some days I don't want to put the effort forth on my husband, so I would rather masturbate. It's not about not being enough, but more about wanting that instant gratification without all the work of pleasing another. /shrug

See I don't have a problem with him watching it with me, or when I'm not home. But when he would rather look at it/watch it when I'm home and whack it rather than have sex with me there is a problem. Or when he will turned me down for 2 weeks, but whack it most of those days there is a problem. And I actually don't fantasize about anyone but my husband.

It's not necessarily that you aren't good enough. Maybe it's just something that turns him on, to see other people going at it. Unless it gets to the point where he stops having sex with you and only jerks off to porn, I wouldn't worry too much. I know a couple who watch porn together, and when they don't have a chance to be intimate, they'll watch it separately without a problem. If it bothers you, you can talk to him; I mean, after all, he is your husband. Personally, I wouldn't be mad at him because I think it's a normal thing, but that's just my opinion.