Nervous about 3 Some

**lisa22** · 10-24-2011 02:41 PM

Hi, new here. I have been dating my bf for 3 years now and I love him more than anything. The sex is great between us and we both enjoy it, the problem is I want to add some spice to the bedroom. I want to bring another guy into the bedroom for a 3 some but I am nervous about how my bf will take it. I'm not sure how to talk to him about it without making him upset. I want him to know that it is not a threat on our relationship.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 10-24-2011 03:20 PM

Lisa, welcome to the Forum.

I'd like you to re-read what you wrote

You say " I don't know how to talk to him without making him upset"
" I want another man in the bedroom" for me, to spice up things for me.

So, ask yourself if this fantasy can remain a fantasy, because in my opinion it will ruin your relationship as your boyfriend would wonder why you want another man? Is he not good enough? Are you really looking at moving on?

Ask yourself if the shoe was on the other foot, how would you feel?

This is for self, not for togetherness of something you would both enjoy, so should you even contemplate it?

Ask why you want this as well.

**jns** · 10-24-2011 03:40 PM

Originally Posted by lisa22

Hi, new here. I have been dating my bf for 3 years now and I love him more than anything. The sex is great between us and we both enjoy it, the problem is I want to add some spice to the bedroom. I want to bring another guy into the bedroom for a 3 some but I am nervous about how my bf will take it. I'm not sure how to talk to him about it without making him upset. I want him to know that it is not a threat on our relationship.

Have you viewed MMF porn together and is he alright with that? Have you hinted that looks like fun and he has agreed? Are both of you very secure in your relationship? Will you allow him to pick the other guy? This last question is very important as he may be more agreeable if he is comfortable with the guy and knows that there is no relationship between him and you (you choose battle, he chooses weapons). If you want two bfs together, that is an unusual relationship and should be discussed in depth before it happens, but first make sure he is comfortable with such arrangements.