Thread: endometriosis & sexual anxiety.

as some of you may know from my previous posts, i was diagnosed w/ endometriosis in september 2011 by laparoscopy (i am a stage 2 sufferer). after my procedure, i waited the full two weeks recommended by my doctor to engage in any sexual activity & it was great! no pain, no pressure. it was the first time in quite some time i was able to have intercourse with my boyfriend without feeling like my insides were on the verge of exploding (& not in a good way).

well for the past month or so (maybe even longer, i've lost track this point) i have been experiencing the same pain i had prior to my surgery (both during sex as well as aching pain in both my hips & groin on a daily basis). the first time i visted my doctor (who also performed my operation), i was diagnosed with a yeast infection which he believed to be the source for my pain. fast forward 2 weeks. back in the gyno's office. same pain. this time i was diagnosed w/ BV (not sure how i managed that, i am in a monogamous relationship, bathe daily & take very good care of my body -- although i do have an iud & i read up online that they may cause BV infections in some women, just a possibility).

now here i am just a few weeks later & the pain still exists. this is causing me a lot of stress with my sexual relationship with my boyfriend . . . every time we wish to be intimate i have this lingering fear that it is going to hurt! some days are better than others. there are times i have sex comfortably but the other 80% of the time it hurts. most of the time i can tell before we even start getting intimate if there is going to be pain or not. i feel bloated & full of a lot of pressure in my abdomen, and those are usually the days sex is painful for me. it's hard on me emotionally to plan my sex life around something i cannot control and i know it's difficult for my boyfriend as well. if i mention any kind of discomfort, he immediately wishes to discontinue having sex for fear of hurting me. he takes my feelings very seriously & it has gotten to the point if i complain about ANY abdominal pain throughout the day, he is weary of getting intimate w/ me, no matter how bad i want it.

i don't know what to do. my boyfriend & i have grown to have a very sexually healthy relationship over the past 3 years and having that taken away from us seems to being putting up a guard between us (physically, never emotionally besides my sadness for not being able to be close to him like i'd like to). i enjoy sex very much with him & want to continue to do so but the anxiety i get from the fear of possible pain prevents me opening up to him fully. i have a follow up appointment with my ob/gyn in early january, but i'd appreciate any comments or friendly advice from women who have perhaps experienced the same thing i am going through.

Have you considered taking the IUD off and try out a different birth control method if that's what you think is aggravating the condition?

yes i have put a lot of thought into it & am very much considering getting it removed. i thought it was a good idea at first bc it's very low maintenance and hormone - free, but i am starting to second guess my decision. before my lap, i consulted my doctor to see if he thought it was a good idea for me to remove it but he wanted to try to keep it in to help aid in pregnancy prevention since the pill doesn't seem to agree with me, at least out of the ones i have tried (i have been on yaz, ortho lo, ortho novum & lo loestrin -- yaz was the only pill that seemed to do me any good but my doctor does not prescribe it to his patients anymore).

i am not certain this is the cause of my problems, but i do consider it. i have spoke with my doctor about the possibility my endo is back, but he seems to think it's too soon (it generally takes 6 months to a year to start experiencing endo symptoms again) but i just don't know what to think. the hard thing about endo is you don't know it's there for certain until an incision is made & i can't afford to take off work every 2 - 3 months to have operations, but i guess i would have to do what i have to do to feel better. my doctor is considering referring me to a pain management specialist if there is nothing physically upsetting me, but i would truly hate to have to rely on drugs to ease my pain.

my pain is primarily in my groin, hips/ovarian region, as well as in my cervix (although this is not as common). i'm not sure if my iud would give me these symtoms, but i do know what i'm feeling is not normal and something needs to be done about it before i have a nervous breakdown. what's a girl to do?

I also have endometriosis, and had extremely painful sex. I say had because I recently had a hysterectomy due to the pain, but it was also painful from lifting too. It can form earlier than 6 months, it did with me. Talk to him about lupron, it puts you through 6 months of menopause. There is also the possibility that he didn't get everything out. Look up endometriosis message boards, they helped me out a lot. They suggested pelvic physical therapy, apparently it helps with pain from sex.

thanks heryseshta for your comment. i am happy to hear you have found a way to cope with your pain, although hysterectomy is not an option for me right now. i am 21, no kids & do plan on starting a family with my boyfriend in the future, so i am still researching alternative ways to help w/ pain relief. i have looked into lupron & although my doctor has not suggested it at this time, if and when he does: i will absolutely REFUSE to try it. it has been very hard for me to adjust to the birth control pill due to my depression and anxiety, so i don't believe this is a good option for me, especially since it's not something like a patch or pill i can just "stop" whenever i please. if i have an adverse reaction i have no choice but to deal with it until it leaves my system 6 months later.

moving on, i do agree with you that there's a possibility my doctor may have missed some of the endo w/ my lap. i am still getting frequent pain in my ovaries as well as some blood in my urine (not visable -- i had no idea until my last doctor's appointment when he did a pregnancy test & urinalysis . . . long story) which has been sent to a lab for diagnosis, so i believe there's a good chance the two could be related.