Worried...need advice

**skirt99** · 12-21-2011 01:07 AM

I can’t sleep. I’ve been really worried about something that’s never happened to me before. Earlier tonight I was in the ladies room freshening up during an office Christmas party. I had had a few drinks and was feeling it. One of my co-workers followed me in and after some small talk, she hugged me and kissed my neck and then full on the mouth. She said that she’d been wanting to do that for a long time and then she left. I have never been with another woman and I’m embarrassed by the fact that it felt good. The whole thing probably only lasted a minute or two but afterward I was wet. I don’t know what to do. Should I tell my husband? And what if she comes on to me again? Do you think I’m a lesbian? Please help

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-21-2011 02:38 AM

It's flattering, and we as women appreciate a woman's body, how we work, touch as we are women.

You had a few drinks, she came onto you, it was exciting, never happened before, and so you got excited.

How you feel tomorrow about it is the answer...Would you ever want to sleep with her?

Or was it just an adventure..

She also took advantage of you but also probably was drunk.

Wait till tomorrow and see how you feel... Maybe you are missing some adventure in your life and she gave that to you, in the moment.

**sp346** · 12-21-2011 09:00 AM

Nothing wrong with being excited about it. We all get turned on by people we will never sleep with because we are already in committed monogomous relationships.

Lesbian - that is just a label society likes to use to separate the them versus us. What does it matter who you are attracted to. You found a kiss with somebody you never expected arousing. So what that she was somebody of the same gender. It just means you found the situation and maybe her attractive. Maybe you find women arousing. Don't go thinking too much about it. There is nothing wrong with being attracted to somebody of your own gender and don't feel you need to label it.

About telling your husband - it depends on your relationship with him and his personality. Will he be jealous or turned on by it. Will he feel this woman assulted you or will he be into it and propose a threesome. If he is the jealous type, I wouldn't tell him. If you have an open relationship where you can talk about those things, then definitely mention it to him. It may be an area to explore.

It may also be a one time drunk thing that you would never do when on intoxicated.

If she should come on to you again, you need to think about your marriage. Do you have an open relationship where stuff like that is OK. Make sure you discuss it with your husband before exploring, you don't want to jeopordize your marriage.

**jns** · 12-21-2011 07:18 PM

Originally Posted by skirt99

I can’t sleep. I’ve been really worried about something that’s never happened to me before. Earlier tonight I was in the ladies room freshening up during an office Christmas party. I had had a few drinks and was feeling it. One of my co-workers followed me in and after some small talk, she hugged me and kissed my neck and then full on the mouth. She said that she’d been wanting to do that for a long time and then she left. I have never been with another woman and I’m embarrassed by the fact that it felt good. The whole thing probably only lasted a minute or two but afterward I was wet. I don’t know what to do. Should I tell my husband? And what if she comes on to me again? Do you think I’m a lesbian? Please help

Physically your body reacts to the situation and something about it turned you on a little bit. What if it was a guy instead with the same reactions? What would you do? She did the kissing, not you. Why complicate your relationship with your husband? Forget about it unless it is something you want to explore or pursue. If it is, tell your husband to find out if he is OK with it.

**littlemary26** · 12-22-2011 04:48 PM

Your not a lesbian, you might have some bi feelings. It happened to me > I was 20 and working for a woman. One day she just hugged me, and then kissed me. She told me if i wanted her to stop, she would. I didn't say anything, it feel very good. her hand went under my clothes feeling and touching my most personnal areas, I still didn't tell her to stop. After a few minutes of this she stopped on her own, and said to me," think about what just happened, if you want it to never happen again , just tell me. But if you want it to happen again and go further, think about it for a few days , then tell me. About 2 days later I told her i wanted it to go further. We had a relationship for about a year. She was married with children, and I datd guys. But every once in a while we had a afternoon, or evening to our selves. I dated guys and got married, now divorced I still date guys. But I offten think about her and how good we made each other feel. So am I a lesbian, no. But I 'am happy I experienced being with another women