Are their intensions honorable?

**inquisitive1** · 07-16-2007, 10:40 PM

Are their intensions honorable? I am an African American and Irish woman. I get a lot of flirting and attention from A LOT of White and some Hispanic men. I am no spring chicken and so I know to take everyone on an individual basis. However, I can't help but wonder if these advances are more for an experimental purpose especially for white men. You see a lot of White women with Black men but not so much Black women with White men. A white gentlemen told me, "God made black women and I love God"! It was humorus, but I didn't know what to think of it.

I don't want to be just an experiment for anyone! I'm asking this woman to woman. Should I take it seriously, if so how do I know when or if I should proceed?

**Iseult** · 07-17-2007, 09:25 AM

I think the way you handle the attention by considering each person on their individual merits is wise. The men you encounter probably find you very attractive, irrespective of ethnic and racial heritage, but if they were to bring up the subject of race all the time, then I can see why it might irk you. I can't speculate on the intentions of these men because having never met them, I can not gauge their personalities, but you can; so I would just advise you to trust your instincts.

For the vast majority of people though, I imagine your looks simply appeal to their personal preference. Everyone has their personal idea of what they find particularly attractive, so enjoy the fact that you are theirs!

**Irelandlover** · 07-17-2007, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by inquisitive1

Are their intensions honorable? I am an African American and Irish woman. I get a lot of flirting and attention from A LOT of White and some Hispanic men. I am no spring chicken and so I know to take everyone on an individual basis. However, I can't help but wonder if these advances are more for an experimental purpose especially for white men. You see a lot of White women with Black men but not so much Black women with White men. A white genlelmen told me, "God made black women and I love God"! It was humorus, but I didn't know what to think of it.

I don't want to be just an experiment for anyone! I'm asking this woman to woman. Should I take it seriously, if so how do I know when or if I should proceed?

Get to know the person and see what they are like. I have heard white women say that they want to sleep with a black man to see what they are like, particularly connected to the stereotype. I have also heard men talk about black women in the same way. If you get to know them you will know whether they just want sex with you or want a serious and longer lasting relationship.

**Ravsoma** · 07-17-2007, 12:43 PM

...Wow...

I'm West Indian and Scottish, but it's black on my birthday certificate because...I look black...or Hawaiian. XD

I don't like the attention I get from guys sometimes. Mostly because I don't take compliments well, but when I do get a compliment and accept it it comes from a guy that happens to not be black. I don't like black guys much, but I do respect white guys courage to approach black women. The way we're protraited you'd think they would be a little scared of us.

I say just go with it. ^_^

07-17-2007, 01:55 PM

The way you phrased your question, the fact you
are seeing colour before person, suggests to me
that you are going to be an 'experiment'.

When you meet a guy, maybe you see his colour
first, but over time, seeing him at work or the
supermarket or wherever, and he becomes 'Fred'
(or whatever his name is) so that you don't
see...'skinny white guy'...and you don't think of
'saw skinny white guy at the bakers'...but "I saw
Fred at the bakers' is a clear sign you are dealing
with Fred as opposed to the generic skinny white guy.

Many times men and women are used as experiments.

The steriotypes kick in and you want to 'try' it.
(Like pizza ice cream or something).

It's not a good idea.

**inquisitive1** · 07-20-2007, 01:08 AM

Hello Inseult-
Woman to woman thank you for taking the time to sincerely answer this question. I take it you received my request to do so? It's so amazing that you and Irelandlover nailed the the two major considerations that lead me to ask the question. Be blessed!!!

**inquisitive1** · 07-20-2007, 01:27 AM

Hello Irelandllover-
Thank you for your reply. That issue you mentioned is what I heard from both sexes as well as all the races. It's a part of what lead me to ask the question. Be blesssed!!!

**inquisitive1** · 08-31-2007, 02:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ravsoma

...Wow...

I'm West Indian and Scottish, but it's black on my birthday certificate because...I look black...or Hawaiian. XD

I don't like the attention I get from guys sometimes. Mostly because I don't take compliments well, but when I do get a compliment and accept it it comes from a guy that happens to not be black. I don't like black guys much, but I do respect white guys courage to approach black women. The way we're protraited you'd think they would be a little scared of us.

I say just go with it. ^_^

Hello Ravsoma-
Better late than never to tell you this, but I was so focused on my other responses to my question and what to do with the situation, I neglected to tell you how dead on you were with your comment about how we are portrayed. One would think they would be afraid or think we're all b****** and h*'s, the point is it would most likely not be something positive. I really agree with you on that statement! Thankfully I surmise most of these men are probablly motivated by taking everyone on an individual basis as well. Just had to tell you this-that's all.

Be Blessed!!!

07-16-2007, 10:40 PM	#1
inquisitive1 VIP Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 248	Are their intensions honorable? Are their intensions honorable? I am an African American and Irish woman. I get a lot of flirting and attention from A LOT of White and some Hispanic men. I am no spring chicken and so I know to take everyone on an individual basis. However, I can't help but wonder if these advances are more for an experimental purpose especially for white men. You see a lot of White women with Black men but not so much Black women with White men. A white gentlemen told me, "God made black women and I love God"! It was humorus, but I didn't know what to think of it. I don't want to be just an experiment for anyone! I'm asking this woman to woman. Should I take it seriously, if so how do I know when or if I should proceed? Last edited by inquisitive1; 07-19-2007 at 05:03 AM.

07-17-2007, 01:55 PM	#5
kaylar Guest Posts: n/a	Don't Be An Experiment The way you phrased your question, the fact you are seeing colour before person, suggests to me that you are going to be an 'experiment'. When you meet a guy, maybe you see his colour first, but over time, seeing him at work or the supermarket or wherever, and he becomes 'Fred' (or whatever his name is) so that you don't see...'skinny white guy'...and you don't think of 'saw skinny white guy at the bakers'...but "I saw Fred at the bakers' is a clear sign you are dealing with Fred as opposed to the generic skinny white guy. Many times men and women are used as experiments. The steriotypes kick in and you want to 'try' it. (Like pizza ice cream or something). It's not a good idea.

07-20-2007, 01:27 AM	#7
inquisitive1 VIP Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 248	Hello Irelandllover- Thank you for your reply. That issue you mentioned is what I heard from both sexes as well as all the races. It's a part of what lead me to ask the question. Be blesssed!!! Last edited by inquisitive1; 10-10-2007 at 03:16 AM.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

07-17-2007, 09:25 AM	#2
Iseult VIP Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 56	I think the way you handle the attention by considering each person on their individual merits is wise. The men you encounter probably find you very attractive, irrespective of ethnic and racial heritage, but if they were to bring up the subject of race all the time, then I can see why it might irk you. I can't speculate on the intentions of these men because having never met them, I can not gauge their personalities, but you can; so I would just advise you to trust your instincts. For the vast majority of people though, I imagine your looks simply appeal to their personal preference. Everyone has their personal idea of what they find particularly attractive, so enjoy the fact that you are theirs!

07-17-2007, 12:43 PM	#4
Ravsoma October 2007 "Poster of the Month" Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 582	...Wow... I'm West Indian and Scottish, but it's black on my birthday certificate because...I look black...or Hawaiian. XD I don't like the attention I get from guys sometimes. Mostly because I don't take compliments well, but when I do get a compliment and accept it it comes from a guy that happens to not be black. I don't like black guys much, but I do respect white guys courage to approach black women. The way we're protraited you'd think they would be a little scared of us. I say just go with it. ^_^

07-20-2007, 01:08 AM	#6
inquisitive1 VIP Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: U.S.A. Posts: 248	Hello Inseult- Woman to woman thank you for taking the time to sincerely answer this question. I take it you received my request to do so? It's so amazing that you and Irelandlover nailed the the two major considerations that lead me to ask the question. Be blessed!!!