Thread: I can't satisfy him

My bf and I have be together for 7 months. I've noticed after having sex I'll glance down at the condoms and they look empty. I mean this is after long awesome foreplay and hours of sex. I don't understand how he is not cumming. He spent the night two weeks ago and we had amazing sex for a long time, and there was plenty of foreplay. I orgasmed at least 3 times. That night I picked up the condom to dispose of it and sure enough he did not cum. I am so worried I am not able to please him please please someone help me. I have asked him if I please him and he says everytime I have. He is lying obviously. I don't know what to do.

As a guy I would advise not worrying too much - even though we like our orgasms its not the whole picture - dont forget he likes to be with YOU - thats what it is really about. Sometimes not orgasming can be linked to self consciousness, the more attention paid the harder it can be to deal with, if he is enjoying himself it will return. Maybe you could talk about it, maybe not, depends on his state of mind at the time and your sensitivity (we can get really senstive about such things - the macho thing that is so hard to eradicate).
The older I get the less important is my satsifaction, its all centred on you girls really - it takes a guy a long time to understand this sometimes

Loris1

if he is not coming after hours of sex then he has a physical problem..you should be able to tell if he is coming..if the condom is empty then he is obviously faking it; that being said that does not necessarily mean he is not enjoying himself..

Dunno if this helps but my boyfriend doesn't like condoms much, he says there's not as much 'friction' when inside of me. He has come a few times using them - could that be the problem?

Condoms could be the problem. Some men just can't orgasm with them.

Sometimes men can become desensitized from too much stimulation of the penis. You may have better luck if you get him very aroused without any genital contact first.

Can he orgasm from things other than intercourse (oral, hands, etc). Might he be concerned about pregnancy - some risk even with a condom - they do break.

Does he usually initiate sex or do you? If you do great(!!), but maybe sometimes he really isn't in the mood - happens to men just like women.

Have you asked him what he most likes in bed?

I believe there is also a medical condition (retrograde ejaculation or some such) where the man orgasms, but the sperm is not ejected - is that a possibility?

Originally Posted by ImStarr

My bf and I have be together for 7 months. I've noticed after having sex I'll glance down at the condoms and they look empty. I mean this is after long awesome foreplay and hours of sex. I don't understand how he is not cumming. He spent the night two weeks ago and we had amazing sex for a long time, and there was plenty of foreplay. I orgasmed at least 3 times. That night I picked up the condom to dispose of it and sure enough he did not cum. I am so worried I am not able to please him please please someone help me. I have asked him if I please him and he says everytime I have. He is lying obviously. I don't know what to do.

Has he ever ejaculated with you or previously?

My view is that s=yuo should not worry about satisfying him, sex is all about you as a woman - its about satisfying you. A lot of people will disagree about this I know, but I for one have come to lreaise this as I get older


Loris