C

Anon, after being interviewed with notes taken less than two years ago on how to help woman be this sexual in her life, it just wouldn't work. How can I tell them that I need a little weed to get it on. .....They know too much about me and besides that I am pretty high on life all the time. But the legs do get sore from too many years of golfing. To tell you the truth, if I got any more of a charge having sex, I swear I would stroke out.

One more thing you had mentioned my generation on blow jobs. I was with it but this was not a big part of my time in life. Sucking a man off was a hush hush thing and this was not too much of a problem for me after a while. Now I am a joke. Just plain love it but Deep Throat did not start until 1972. When that came out Jackie Kennedy closed the theater in New York for a private performance. I read that she sat through it two times. This is when oral sex on men and swallowing started to become a thing. First whispered and then how do I take lessons. But I was already 14 years into marriage and was with the program then.

As far as kids growing up. It must be . Living with the mess of the world. How do they plan a future? Assinations all over. Countries who hate countries and it goes on and on. I think a site like this does help kids. If they have no where to go at least they find people to talk to here. Of the many sites around, this would be one of the most healthy for them in many reasons. I think for that reason that words should be chosen carefully not to push them farther into drug use and abusing their women. Seeing we cannot edit, I have tried to think 25 times before I put something on......Unfortunately last night I hurt thinking from the past that I could not change and the helpless parent that I was and it showed. If I had my edit on I would have taken it off.

For anyone to think that they will be the perfect parent, think again. I do not say this like a know it all, I say this to warn you of the unknown. It lurks at every corner and is the killer of happy families. I, like many other parents watching these Forums, could write a book. It would reflect sadness, new knowledge and many I wish'es...........But I guess that is life.....

anonymouswhitefemale

You don't tell them it's for sex, you tell them it's to dull the aches in your knees or whatever - trust me, it's a great painkiller. Better and more effective, IMO, than Codeine and stuff (equal or better pain killing whilst minimizing unpleasant side effects). Quite a lot of my friends' parents' either buy or grown their own cannabis. As for how it effects things, it just makes you more relaxed, and feel more in tune with your body, enhanced and heightened sensations... etc etc

nybabiiex3

Hi, I was reading this however I didn't read everything, and as a 17 year old sexually active girl myself I just wanted to share some of my own thoughts. I came to this website because I knew I would get answers from people and be able to really talk about some things. As far as the age of 13 being the new age that girls are being sexually active now it surprises me. I was 16 when I first had sex with my boyfriend of 2 years, and will be three years in a few months, always used protection & still do. I just wanted to say if its annoying/or disturbing to anyone when they read young girls questions or stories, this website looks like it could do a lot of good I know from the few mins. I have been a member I already see it helping me out it some things.

LadyLane

From anonymousewhitefemale - "I know you have good intentions, but you lost all chances of me as a your child trusting you with the above sentance. I mean monitoring emails? How can you possibly expect love and respect and friendship from your child if you spy on them?

In fact, on another forum, I remember someone asking for a keylogger to spy on his kid, read her emails and stuff. He got told to **** right off."

Well, first off let's thank god you aren't my child. Secondly, I am IN CHARGE. It is MY HOUSE. I decide what's best for her until she can decide for herself... which is no time before she leaves for college. See how you're on this forum with a nick that suggests you're a woman, when actually you're a man? I want to know, when my daughter is on the computer, who she is talking to and about what. I have no delusions that she will be approached by men purporting to be young boys or girls in order to befriend her and gain her trust. When it comes to my child, I can't trust anyone I don't know. Simple as that.

I don't care who was told to screw off on this blog and for what reason. Do you know that a 13 year old girl killed herself because her neighbor's mother put up a fake profile on MySpace, pretending to be a cute teenage boy, who the 13-y.o. girl then had an online romance with... and the mother, acting as the boy, told her she was better off dead, that the world was a better place without her disgusting, ugly face? So she hanged herself. It's not her parents fault... but neither the child nor her parents knew who she was talking to, and about what.

If you're a parent, I say good luck to your kids. My job is to make sure my girls survives and thrives. Not to make sure I am the coolest mom on the block and for my daughter to think I'm her BFF.

Little

I would feel very invaded if I knew someone was reading my e-mails/checking my Myspace/Facebook/etc ...
But there has to be some kind of surveillance.
Kids these days are smart; they know to what lengths they have to go to delete things they don't want you to see. It's all too easy to get into an internet history and delete everything "without a trace" ... to the average person, anyhow.
I think the best option is to keep the computer visible, walk in at complete random (and often!) and ask, "Who are you talking to? Where do you know him/her from?" etc.
Until I got Myspace, I never had "IRL" friends I talked to online. They were all people I didn't know in person. I've even met one of them ... but I did it smart. Came with friends, in a public place, etc ...
A genius could probably keep up a complete lie for 5+ years, but by definition, geniuses are a minority. The warning flag is someone who's just gotta know asl ... the big one's LOCATION. Okay, everyone here knows I live in Tennessee. Big state, no big deal. If you want to try to find me based on that, you're in for it. Don't let your kids give out cities. Haha, at one point I wouldn't even give out my time zone. I was like, 10 or 12. It's surprising what a stalker can do, though. I'm a big girl now who lives in a well-lit apartment complex with police on speed dial, so I don't worry so much anymore. Maybe that's not a good thing ...
I agree that parents shouldn't be "BFF" with their kids, but checking after e-mail, etc, is not necessarily the best way to go about it.

C

You are so right on your response. I believe that seeing that the younger generation are coming here looking for help that we must be careful not to encourage them in drugs and comments that have no place here. We, too, were strict parents. You have to be. When we got married we swore to each other that we would never forget all the problems of the young as they age. This included dealing with their sexuality. I accepted the times and grew with them. But kids are confused. This is the most confusing times in their life. I sounded off on a post above about the situation of being a parent. Before I did this I thought it over well. To me it was more important that if some confused youth is reading what I wrote that they saw that we love our kids. We would die for our kids but we have to do what we have to do because we have been through that rough time in life being young. I looked at my baby girl and vowed that I would never forget how hard it was growing up. I have always tried and any problems were not mine. She has told me this many times. A moment that I will always remember and take with me is her saying to me when she fell in love with her second husband....."Mom, now I feel like you and Dad are....It was then, that I knew that we did a good job.

Anon: seriously you should not have told me to get some weed because some of your friends parents use it......Truly, I don't have to lighten up...I am there....

misskitty3

everyone here has such good points and i kinda agree with everyone in some respect or another but what triggered me to write this is LadyLane's posts.

i consider myself a pretty laid back type of person and aware of what is going on in the world, but when (if) i have a child, they will know that I am the adult and they are the child. respect is earned. monitoring will occur until trust is formed. once you teach your child right from wrong and comfort them on uncomfortable issues, i believe the child will be willing to share their life with mom and dad.

that poor girl that hung herself.... i am so touched and angered by that story. her parents could've monitored her more closely but that evil woman was pretending to be a cute boy with a crush, how was anyone to know?

my parents never disciplined me or taught me about sex. i had to learn on my own and even now, my husband has to teach me things that every woman should know and i don't.

i always say, "better safe than sorry" kids will get over the fact you are snooping or checking up on them, reading their diary, but if something is going on, and you don't know about it...kids usually don't get over suicide, myspace abductions, rape, etc...

just my two cents.

__________________
Miss Kitty

C

You are 1000000000% right......Those cute little kids that you have....Those precious cherub's that flew down from heaven to park in your arms......Those adorable angel's....will lie through their teeth.....sneak beer out of your refrigerator.....steal your cigars......hide booze in your house.........pot can appear in new places that you can't find......but lie....their nose should be dragging on the floor....that went for two out of my three.......and their girlfriends will back them up....Try reading a diary.....You will stroke out on the spot......think you were in trouble when you were bad....Holy ****......And we were on top of things.....In with other great parents.....

Now half of the kids reading this are laughing their heads off because they know where I am coming from......BEEN THERE and it was not fun....Now you can see why we have so much fun now.....But I would do it all over again....I love them all to death...Now they take care of me...

anonymouswhitefemale

Aw, would I be that much of a dissapointment?

And that's exactly why you don't talk to your parents about stuff, as they are a figure of power not friendship, which is exactly the point I made in the first place. After saying that'd never be the same with you, you've reinforced that fact even by shouting (captials).

You shouldn't really be allowing your child on the internet AT ALL until you've taught them how to get on in life.

I did indeed know about this event, and I've discussed it elsewhere (the legality of it). A known depressive (and suicidal) 13 year old girl SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ON THE INTERNET. The internet is a dangerous place, where the impressionable can suffer greatly. Her mum should've known that. So whilst I might be seeming to concur with you that control is needed (ie that it's plain idiotic to allow a young child online - without RIGEROUS safeguards), once someone reaches a sensible age, where they can think for themselves, 15 or so, if you are CAUGHT spying on your children, you will lose whatever trust you had.

Thanks. I think I'll know what's best for my future children, and I will act for their best, just like any other parent. However, teaching a child to live in a cage and to make your decisions rather than their own wouldn't be my preffered way to do things. And your complete 180 is rather suprising - first you say that you're offended that your child might not approach you with a problem, then you basically outline how tyranical you would be.

anonymouswhitefemale

I'm sorry if anything I said was out of line for this board - it's just that you mentioned that you wished you'd tried it, and that you saw your age as an insurmountable obstacle to this end, so I thought I'd educate you on the reality of the situation. I shouldn't have done that.