Thread: orgasm problem..

My boyfriend is always saying 'i want to make you cum'.. simply because i haven't. as far as i know, i have never been able to. i've pretty much focused majority of my sexual encounters on my partner, so it's never been an issue for me.
in recent conversation with a close friend, i discussed my 'problem' with her. she asked me to explain what happens to me. i told her i get a warm sensation, and i start spasming, usually for a minute or so. she told me that is in fact having an orgasm. but i guess i'm just not convinced. when this happens, it always feels as if there should be something more that never happens...

is she right? or am i infact still not orgasming??

Originally Posted by nikki22

My boyfriend is always saying 'i want to make you cum'.. simply because i haven't. as far as i know, i have never been able to. i've pretty much focused majority of my sexual encounters on my partner, so it's never been an issue for me.
in recent conversation with a close friend, i discussed my 'problem' with her. she asked me to explain what happens to me. i told her i get a warm sensation, and i start spasming, usually for a minute or so. she told me that is in fact having an orgasm. but i guess i'm just not convinced. when this happens, it always feels as if there should be something more that never happens...

is she right? or am i infact still not orgasming??

YEAH I KNOW THAT FEELING... MY EX USE TO ASK ME ALL THE TIME WHEN HE FINISHED DID I COME... AND IT REALLY MADE ME WONDER... EXCEPT HE NEVER LASTED 3 MIN LITERALLY... I do know that now with my wonderful man im with now... I have sorry to say tho, that there is alot of women that dont have a orgasm while having sex and unfortunately i have found out that i one of those women.... I have to make my self cum with use of a vibrator but man it is good... i go thru spasms and my body jerks and my feet literally burn and then i cry afterwards.. weird huh... hope this helped....

Well, I'm pretty sure that is an orgasm..Sorry you're disappointed about em'! That's exactly what it's like for me...Warmth, then my whole body tenses up and then the tensions released in spasms.

Not disappointed, it just seems like there is something I'm missing. Hard to explain I guess. But you are saying that the spasms and whatnot is the actual release?

The easiest way to find out what it feels like is to start by exploring yourself...if that means grabbing a mirror and looking or touching yourself to find your secret places...then do that. If you find the spot that feels tingly, work with it and see where it goes.

Once you know, then you can adjust yourself to feel pleasure with someone else.

Just reread your post: There are levels and levels, you are young, experiment and try new things...it's fun .

I appreciate your response, but no one has infact told me if what I am experiencing is an orgasm

Help anyone?

Nikki, I think when you're young they start like this, it depends on the person and the situation and how comfortable you are in your body.

The flip side is that 'that' may be all there is and some women never experience even 'that'! Yet orgasms can also get to be much more.. it's different with everyone...but that takes self knowledge and experience and maybe even the one right guy who knows how to stimulate you in just the right way . An open mind and practice make it better and better.

Thanks for your answer. But FTW, I am not that young, and have been experienced for a while

Originally Posted by nikki22

Thanks for your answer. But FTR*, I am not that young, and have been experienced for a while

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