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Thread: I can't give head...help!!!!

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    Default I can't give head...help!!!!


    Hi girlies..

    Need sum tips and advice on this touchy subject! Im with my bf 4 yeard now and have tried numerous times to give him oral sex, i cant physically do it i always gag!! Its frustrating for me, not him surprisingly, he has never pressured me into it. He is very giving in the bedroom so i jsu want to give somethin back..

    Any tips??

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    Quote Originally Posted by lashes View Post
    Hi girlies..

    Need sum tips and advice on this touchy subject! Im with my bf 4 yeard now and have tried numerous times to give him oral sex, i cant physically do it i always gag!! Its frustrating for me, not him surprisingly, he has never pressured me into it. He is very giving in the bedroom so i jsu want to give somethin back..

    Any tips??
    I think a lot of guys would love it if you took it all the way down, but if you "gag" then try licking him all the way up and down the shaft, sucking only the head and licking as your doing it, and use your hand at the bottom at the same time and as someone said here that i keep mentioning but i know it works at least as words go so far" own it" and don't think about it as an object rather make love to it as if it is yours, i don't think he will care if amongst all of that you only go down half way with your mouth.......

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    Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Array shweedart's Avatar
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    I gag too! I really cant deepthroat and I gag easily just brushing my teeth let alone scoffing someones ********!

    Chandlers wish has pretty much covered anything I'd say

    for us, tongue work on the head is the way forward!
    And its not very nice of me but i pre-warn him that if he pushed my head or thrusts up im either gonna bite it off or throw up in his lap so HANDS OFF!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by shweedart View Post
    I gag too! I really cant deepthroat and I gag easily just brushing my teeth let alone scoffing someones ********!

    Chandlers wish has pretty much covered anything I'd say

    for us, tongue work on the head is the way forward!
    And its not very nice of me but i pre-warn him that if he pushed my head or thrusts up im either gonna bite it off or throw up in his lap so HANDS OFF!!

    I'm not sure what made me laugh more? the first line or the last one...

    I needed a morning laugh, that was funny, gutsy woman tell it how it is... Good for you...

    CW

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    If the guy is circumcised, be aware that the skin above the circumcision line is the most sensitive, as far as bringing a guy to orgasm. Also be aware of the frenulum, that ridge of skin that runs from the circumcision line to the head, just below the urethral opening. In particular that spot where the frenulum intersects the circumcision line can be very sensitive. So instead of focusing on taking the guy all the way into your mouth, just try working your lips and tongue along the frenulum for a few minutes and see how he likes it. If you practice enough you should be able to make him come without even getting any in your mouth.

    So the basic thing you can do is use your hand to stroke the shaft below the line, while using your mouth on the area above the line, but like I said focus on the area I just mentioned and you should be able to get him off without gagging or getting your mouth tired. And remember that when the guy starts to ejaculate, he's actually about halfway into his orgasm at that point, and the head itself will become quite sensitive, but you can keep working the frenulum area all the way until he's done, and actually extend the pleasure of his orgasm that way. One way to tell if he's done with his orgasm is if he releases the tension in his leg muscles.

    Also, the lead-up, the teasing is very important. While the guy still has his pants on, reach down and see if you can make him hard, and if you can locate that spot where the frenulum is, try using the heel of your hand to rub him in a circular motion around that spot. You can pretty much drive a guy crazy doing that, so by the time you're getting down to business he's already halfway there.

    Also, it's the little things, the way you show your personality that really gets a guy. If you spend time at the beginning just gently kissing his penis and scrotum, and throw in a few lines like, "You have a really nice c**ck, I like the way the head gets all nice and round when you're hard," trust me guys eat that stuff up. What you are aiming for is to emphasize your femininity and build up his masculinity. And guys are very visual, so if you have long hair, flip it out of the way so he can see what you're doing. If you ever look at porn, you'll see a lot of women do this "sexy hair flip" thing before they go down on a guy, like it's part of their act.

    That's all I can think of for now. Have fun...

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    Junior Member Array KristenJ's Avatar
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    There are some lubes that you can use to help you not gag. I live in NC and there is one that is offered from one of our companies called Great Head. It actually helps loosen and numb the throat so that you will be able to take more of him in and not gag. Try organizing parties, like a Pure Romance party, and get something from them. Or you can actually visit some novelty stores and they may have an alternative.

    Other than that, I agree with the others comments. Try working the head. Running your tongue over it and down to the base. You don't necessarily have to deep throat it. Most guys like it when you just try it.

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    Just for the record my wife cant either maybe 3 times in 24 years and just for a few minutes . I totally undertood and she was up front that it just gross's her out , me on the other hand I enjoy oral sex on her as much as penetration sex and she doesnt ask me to but allows me too and enjoys it because she knows I enjoy it . I would not be able to enjoy something that I KNEW my wife wasnt comfortable with or just plain didnt like to do....Lee

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    VIP Member Array Just-a-regular-guy's Avatar
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    Default WOW! Great subject

    This is my first post... please be gentle....
    As a male who has been married 22 years with only my wife as "past experience" I can tell you that there are guys out there (like me) who really struggle with this topic. I love getting and receiving oral sex with my wife. The trouble is she isn't thrilled with give..... what is a guy to do... because I don't get to experience that wonderful sensation... I think about it ALL the time!!! I really wish my wife felt the same way.... secretly I long for it.... I have heard that pineapple juice works well for semen taste - needless to say I drink gallons of it each week hoping....

    Oh well..... keep the line of communications open on this topic... it helps just to talk about it..... though it sometimes makes me jealous to hear about all these other guys having all the fun....

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    Quote Originally Posted by Just-a-regular-guy View Post
    This is my first post... please be gentle....
    As a male who has been married 22 years with only my wife as "past experience" I can tell you that there are guys out there (like me) who really struggle with this topic. I love getting and receiving oral sex with my wife. The trouble is she isn't thrilled with give..... what is a guy to do... because I don't get to experience that wonderful sensation... I think about it ALL the time!!! I really wish my wife felt the same way.... secretly I long for it.... I have heard that pineapple juice works well for semen taste - needless to say I drink gallons of it each week hoping....

    Oh well..... keep the line of communications open on this topic... it helps just to talk about it..... though it sometimes makes me jealous to hear about all these other guys having all the fun....
    There are so many variables in a marriage that it's hard to know where to start. I see sex as kind of like the canary in the coal mine, that is, if things are not going well in general (financial problems, trouble with the kids, etc.) it often seems like the sex life in the first thing to go.

    My experience is that the wife is more likely to want to try new things if she is happy in general. The main thing a husband can do is figure out what makes her desire sex. For me it's a lot about exercise and being in shape, and also doing all the normal husband stuff like helping out around the house so she doesn't have anything to complain about. The ultimate would be for her to come home to an immaculate house, with a trail of rose petals leading to a tub with the bath drawn and candles around the tub...

    I'm not saying you have to do that, I'm just saying you need to make sure everything is going well in general, then broach the subject of how she can be more "into" the sexual aspect of the marriage. Once all the elements are in place you can get into the specific issue of her giving you head. But the main thing you can do is just ask her what she needs from you in order to feel more passionate and have more desire regarding sex, and then listen to what she has to say.

    And here's the "other" answer...

    Women need the special bond of intercourse to really feel connected to a man. If the passion is there whey you are f**cking, that opens the door to everything else. If it's not there, you need to deal with that first. You're not just her husband, you are her man, her mate. It really is quite primal. You need to maintain and nurture that bond if you expect her to be in the mood to experiment and test her limits with regard to sucking your c**ck.

    Hope this helps. Good luck.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Richard S View Post
    There are so many variables in a marriage that it's hard to know where to start. I see sex as kind of like the canary in the coal mine, that is, if things are not going well in general (financial problems, trouble with the kids, etc.) it often seems like the sex life in the first thing to go.

    My experience is that the wife is more likely to want to try new things if she is happy in general. The main thing a husband can do is figure out what makes her desire sex. For me it's a lot about exercise and being in shape, and also doing all the normal husband stuff like helping out around the house so she doesn't have anything to complain about. The ultimate would be for her to come home to an immaculate house, with a trail of rose petals leading to a tub with the bath drawn and candles around the tub...

    I'm not saying you have to do that, I'm just saying you need to make sure everything is going well in general, then broach the subject of how she can be more "into" the sexual aspect of the marriage. Once all the elements are in place you can get into the specific issue of her giving you head. But the main thing you can do is just ask her what she needs from you in order to feel more passionate and have more desire regarding sex, and then listen to what she has to say.

    And here's the "other" answer...

    Women need the special bond of intercourse to really feel connected to a man. If the passion is there whey you are f**cking, that opens the door to everything else. If it's not there, you need to deal with that first. You're not just her husband, you are her man, her mate. It really is quite primal. You need to maintain and nurture that bond if you expect her to be in the mood to experiment and test her limits with regard to sucking your c**ck.

    Hope this helps. Good luck.

    This very true.

    When i was first married, my (ex) husband would help me as well as laugh with me and do those little things and i would even go to the extent of going and have a game of pool with him locally dressed accordingly, but chose not to wear knickers and tell him whilst playing, touch his groin when no one was looking.... I was in a happy place.

    But, once married, he changed and well i was the slave, so bed to me was like, slavery and basically it was all his way and i did not have any inclination to go down on him at all.

    In addition he was just terrible, well meaning, he would always laugh put it just in, never moan, never show he was enjoying it and made me feel that anything was dirty because there was no communication.

    He had been a Virgin until 31, i wasn't perhaps that also played a part in it who knows.

    But, i agree, if it is all there, warmth, fuzzy, laughter, then it is easy to "want" to do things to a man.

    Make no mistake, i will be making up for all lost time.........and enjoy all the things i read in relation to that, because i have always been sensual and it's not fair to have that supressed.

    The circumcision is an interesting post as well.

    I am fortunate that this man i communicate very well with him me.... Hurry up 6 weeks.


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