Thread: Would men be better lovers if pegged once?

Originally Posted by ILuvHim

please give references from women that have been raped that have had orgasms....

Orgasm is a biological response to stimulation regardless of the stimulation. Wiki is one study. There are women that do orgasm during rape second to the physical stimulation. Some rapists make their victems masturbate to orgasm, some perform oral sex. Just as a child of incest might orgasm even though whats being done to them is wrong their body is responding to the stimulation. The body's natural response to stimulation.

Originally Posted by ILuvHim

so a man that wants to be pegged, is trying to learn from a woman's perspective what it is like to have anal sex???? highly unlikely.....

More likely than not. Some men are very considerate of their partner and what they are feeling and again, wouldnt ask their partner to do what they themselves would not try. Prostate stimulation is reported to be very pleasurable for men regardless of wether its done by a finger or a dildo. Your doctor BF should be able to tell you that.

Originally Posted by ILuvHim

men that want to be pegged are either gay, bisexual, or have some other type of issue.....

And women who like oral sex are either lesbian, bisexual or have some other type of issue. (sarcasm for those of you who think I really mean that) Same could be said for ANY out of the norm sex act such as choking during orgasm, getting off on pain, liking our hair pulled...

Originally Posted by ILuvHim

but we as women should not be getting off on degrading our men.....or trying to show them what its like to be a woman........i would never want to be a man.....there lives are much more physically demanding then ours and honestly i am not for taking out the trash, fixing cars, climbing roofs, shoveling the snow, and going and seeing what is making those noises in the middle of the night when i hear them......

It's only degrading if its not something he wants to do and you force him to do it. Kind of like the nagging woman...honeyyyyyy, take out the garbage, I didnt know what that light that said check oil really meant, get up there and clean the gutters, I might break a nail if I actually pick up a shovel and move the snow out of my own way and EEEEKkk, a spider, kill it kill it.

Originally Posted by ILuvHim

Sorry ladies....men aren't women....if i wanted my man to be a woman i would have been a lesbian.....not some guys that wants to get in touch with his feminine side....

Its too bad more men don't try to understand feminine. Same as it's a shame more women don't try to experience what a man might have to go through to stop the nag. Do you honestly think they want to come home from work and hear how you siezed up the engine because you couldn't put a quart of oil in the car?

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

Personally? If a man wanted to try that with me, off course he has a penis, so he doesn't need a strap on and i was in a long term relationship, i would give it a go to experiement and see how i feel... I 1/2 tried it when i was young and i remember that once i relaxed it actually had a not bad feel, just couldn't handle the pain so stopped.

Life is about trying new things, bit like "choking".

It's all about CHOICE... yeah, yeah, i keep saying it but it's a fact... Their choice to do, yours to not.

And, as Fallen1 said,

I just wanted to add the one exception is when a man has serious ED/Impotence having him wear a strap-on can be great. And with the cost of Viagra its nice to have that as an option.

We enjoy the variety and the fun thing about strap on sex (for the woman) is that the strap on never goes flacid at the EXACT wrong time ;-) Plus DH thinks its made him better at intercourse because it takes his focus off his climax. *Although he does orgasm if we put a vibe between us and he doesn't need to be erect btw.

Another fun thing is you can try a little variety with size and shape. Which is why the idea of Fisting and the porn stories about men with a huge penis is not that appealing. Having tried sex with larger sized toys? Folks it really doesn't feel good. And having your cervix bashed just hurts! So guys upset about their size? Ahh... don't unless your really tiny.

You know as I post this I wonder if I should limit it to men with ED? I think having a man do this is great regardless of his erection for the variety etc...

Originally Posted by tmmanus

ILUVHIM, you make a lot of assertions and assumption that aren’t universally true. As a man who enjoys pegging and whose wife enjoys pegging, I can tell you I’m not gay or want to be gay or think about being gay. I’m also not submissive, in fact my wife and I have played around with some light BDSM and she and I prefer me in the dominant role. Also, when we do pegging I don’t dress like a women, I don’t suck the dildo, my wife doesn’t call me , etc. I know some people may like that stuff and that’s fine for them. But not everyone. Lots of guys who enjoy pegging will agree with this. There is no degradation or intent to degrade involved.

It’s a fact that stimulating the prostate with toys, including strapon-on dildo’s, can cause men to have orgasms, sometimes great orgasms. Lots of guys will attest to this. Not every man, just as some women don’t have g-spot orgasms.

Frankly, along with the great prostate stimulation, I enjoy sharing the experience with my wife, I like “giving” my body to her and allowing her to be the aggressor for a change, as with most men, I’m usually the aggressor in bed, and it is nice to relax and let someone do something to you once in a while- depends on my mood. And yes, I also take out the trash and work around the house and watch sports and all the other manly stuff. I think a man who can’t feel manly without being aggressive has more problem issues than a man who gets pegged.

What my wife likes, as I’ve seen it expressed elsewhere, being in control of my pleasure and making me very excited, she also finds my body attractive (thank god) and enjoys looking at me in a different way that she finds sexy.

Fallen 1 has exactly grasped my point in this post – I found that that being pegging made me a better lover. For example, I’d tried anal sex before with my wife, but after being pegged I was much better at it because I REALLY understood the need to go slow, allow for adjustment, and use lots of lube – and to ask for feedback and look for clues about what she enjoyed and how she felt. So besides having a lot of fun, I think it made me a better, more responsive lover. My position is that men in general might learn something from being penetrated that might make them better lovers. Maybe not every man. And the point is not to allow men to “learn” what anal or vaginal sex is precisely like – it’s to learn how it feels to allow someone to penetrate your body and what it feels like to give a degree of control of your body to someone else in a relationship – many couples talk about an increased feeling of intimacy that can result, that was certainly the case for my wife and I.

The bottom line, if you’re not into it, don’t do it. But if you’re interested, don’t avoid it you’re afraid it’s gay or unmanly. What is “manly” is up to each person or couple, and gay is what two men do with each other – no other way to define it.

Well said - I could not have put it better myself. We have been into pegging for near on a decade. We both enjoy it greatly and it is now an established part of our sex lives. I certainly can orgasm from prostate stimulation alone (not always but when the mood is right). The sensation of being pegged is very like the feelings you get during normal sex when you are holding off the climax to make it last as long as possible. Only with pegging the feeling goes on for a long time without the struggle to hold back. I guess this is to be expected as the 'engine room' of the male orgasm is in the region of the prostate. This is where the contractions occur that drive ejaculation so I guess it's to be expected that fairly direct stimulation of this region can cause profound sensations.

I always find the idea that it is somehow gay rather strange. Others have made the point that it is the sex of the partner you choose to have sex with that determines your sexuality, not the type of stimulation you like to give or receive. From my point of view I'm quite happy that I'm not gay - not only am I not in the slightest bit interested in sex with another man I'm only interested in sex with my wife. The experience of being pegged seems in this regard little different to any other type of sex we have. At all times I'm aware of her scent, her hair cascading over my body, her breasts pressed against me, her hand caressing me, her soft voice imploring me to give in to the sensations she is giving me...

If that's gay then so be it

Originally Posted by gyrator53

Well said - I could not have put it better myself. We have been into pegging for near on a decade. We both enjoy it greatly and it is now an established part of our sex lives. I certainly can orgasm from prostate stimulation alone (not always but when the mood is right). The sensation of being pegged is very like the feelings you get during normal sex when you are holding off the climax to make it last as long as possible. Only with pegging the feeling goes on for a long time without the struggle to hold back. I guess this is to be expected as the 'engine room' of the male orgasm is in the region of the prostate. This is where the contractions occur that drive ejaculation so I guess it's to be expected that fairly direct stimulation of this region can cause profound sensations.

I always find the idea that it is somehow gay rather strange. Others have made the point that it is the sex of the partner you choose to have sex with that determines your sexuality, not the type of stimulation you like to give or receive. From my point of view I'm quite happy that I'm not gay - not only am I not in the slightest bit interested in sex with another man I'm only interested in sex with my wife. The experience of being pegged seems in this regard little different to any other type of sex we have. At all times I'm aware of her scent, her hair cascading over my body, her breasts pressed against me, her hand caressing me, her soft voice imploring me to give in to the sensations she is giving me...

If that's gay then so be it

That being said......BUT IS IT MORE EROTIC AND WONDERFUL THAN MOUNTING AND HAVING A WOMAN..... I don't like to get into these discussion as I have never had a man that needed this....BUT listening to you and your men that love this, you favor this over a woman and this is what upsets me......

I know a few Sex Therapists...I have asked if this is a predominant problem in marriages and they say NO.....They say that this is far from a prerequisite to a good marriage and many men have no interest in it....With that in mind, I think that woman should not feel that she is not a good woman and a good lover without doing this sexual act....Just my thoughts and I will leave it at this....

Originally Posted by CarolineWH

That being said......BUT IS IT MORE EROTIC AND WONDERFUL THAN MOUNTING AND HAVING A WOMAN..... I don't like to get into these discussion as I have never had a man that needed this....BUT listening to you and your men that love this, you favor this over a woman and this is what upsets me......

I know a few Sex Therapists...I have asked if this is a predominant problem in marriages and they say NO.....They say that this is far from a prerequisite to a good marriage and many men have no interest in it....With that in mind, I think that woman should not feel that she is not a good woman and a good lover without doing this sexual act....Just my thoughts and I will leave it at this....

I'm not sure why you think I or my wife favour pegging over conventional sex. As with most couples we like variety in what we do and by 'ringing the changes' we get more pleasure out of conventional sex which still predominates in our love-making. I think few people would welcome a totally predictable, unvarying sex life that, say, always happened in the missionary position slightly to the right of the centre of the bed starting at 10.35pm and lasting exactly 3 minutes. Some like to change things with oral, some with silk sheets, some with toys. Lots of people want to try all sorts of things to keep the interest in their sex lives. Pegging is just one of those options. Unfortunately, unlike oral sex, which has outlived its taboo phase - no one would now try to convince a woman it was wrong for her to enjoy this - pegging is still somehow seen as edgy or taboo.

Sex is like Ice Cream. Sure Strawberry is good but do you want to have that every single time? Yes, adding silk sheets, vibes, toys to the bed room is fun. I wish we had started doingf that 10 years earlier! Sex can be a chore you do to please your husband or just to procreate. But Why? I don't think its a sin to do things with your husband that are creative in bed.

I think every generation questions what is taboo. My grandparents felt that oral sex was just beyond the pale and only disgusting perverts would do it. And I think it worth considering that being able to use a strap-on and have it feel good probably only became possible a short time ago when they started making silicone dildos. All those plastic and rubber ones? Yuck...

Is a man making love to a woman in a conventional position beautiful? Of course... But I think a women and man making love with a strap-on can also be amazing. If we can switch back to the first time DH made love to me with a strap-on (because of his ED) trust me THAT was beautiful.

Women have G spots and we have been learning how great that can be when stimulated. Men have a prostate that I think is very similar except of course where its located.

Ok... Pegging is not for everyone. And some couples with ED will just opt out of doing male Strap-on sex because its too "fringe" for them. I do get that. I guess the only reason I keep posting on this thread is that people keep saying its "gay" or all about cross dressing or whatever. I want to be nice but thats really not right. Folks thats in YOUR warped minds. Trust me at least a few of us don't think that Pegging is anything but hetrosexual anal sex.

I have interest in this and can say It definitly has nothing to do with homosexuality. To me it's just another kinky act to give a go, dressing up like a girl And all that, whoa whoa whoa. That's a whole different thing, something I don't wanna have Anything ta do with. For all I know I could completely hate it. It's one of those things it either into or your not, definitly not for every1.

Just too things, one, I don't know why the assumption would be made that we preferred pegging over regular sex, the ratio is about 50-1 how often we have regular sex to pegging. It's just a fun variation every once in a while, as others have noted.

It's also not about being a man adopting a gay or female role - it's a women penetrating a man. Admitedly some may enjoy the additional part of the man becoming a women by dressing up , etc. but we're not into that and I think many others enjoying pegging aren't either. My wife and I aren't trying to switch sexes, we're swapping lead roles during fun sex. And if you beleive that it isn't manly if the man isn't always in charge than I think that's pretty shortsighted.

I have to agree with the concept , if a guy wants to do anal with the girl , she gets to do it to him too . I understand its not for everyone as well , but its a wonderful point .

no way in the world would my bf allow that to happen. if i'd even mention that to him i'm sure he would freak out. he calls that gay to even rub on his booty. he also said any man who allows his wife or gf to play anywhere around their *** or even penetrate for sure is gay. i've honestly never heard of men likeing that unless they were bisexual.