Im 41yr old and a virgin, my problem is i masturbate a lot, 3/4 times a day sometimes it can be more to the point im sore, anyway reason im posting here is i need advice, i have a major problem which is scaring me and upsetting friends or losing friends because of it, when i get aroused i seem to want to tell ppl mostly women that im hard and need to masturbate or i am, and the way i do this is either msn or texts or through some sort of chatroom or through a game called world of warcraft, in this game u can whisper ppl, so when i get hard and need to masturbate i pm a female i know, or any female character in the game although the character might be male, and tell them im horny etc, now this is freakin me out, as i dont have an answer why i do this, but what scares me the most is what if the person i whisper is a child?
I dont want to do this i want to STOP my sex drive if im honest, and doing what i have ive already lost valued friends i loved and cared about as u can understand as its some think ppl just dont want to know esp women, and its making me depressed, i dont want to be like this and why i am i dont know as ive only been like it the past 18months, and i just cant explain why. i do admit im addicted to masturbation, i have been to my GP and also seen a sex therapist and they have both said i have no self control and if i cant stop then my doctor can do so by castration or chemical castration but her and my therapist think it needs to be long term so maybe castration is needed, or chemical castration so if i masturbate i may just go limp, or wont reach orgasm and after a while i just wont get an erection ever again which both doctor and sex therapist having a sex drive is bad for me, even if it means i cant get sexualy turned on again basicaly limp for good, there given to sex offender to make them limp and stop them offending again,both gp and therapist want my sex drive dead so i wont expose and masturbate to young girls etc in the future and they don’t know this is recently happend when a friends daughter caught me in her toilet.

I admit i want to stop what im doing, but i cant on my own and in away i want to masturnbate and cum and not have it were i touch myself and i get no sexual feelings in my willy, but i CANNOT stop what im doing. And i don’t really have any friends i can talk to about this and seek advice so here i am posting here, and i mostly want female views as there the ones i do what im doing with although theres are the odd few guys, i just don’t have a clue it runs my life and i get depressed and even think about suicide as i wouldn’t have thought masturbation would get me down so much and to the point i have lost all the valued friends i had, there was somethink that happend at school but i didn’t post it here as wasn’t sure, but i need help but admit i cannot stop this myself sometimes i wish my gp or therapist could do things against my will then i don’t have to make the decision but i have to. So please post your views and i know i sound like a sex offender but thats what i don’t want to be i hate myself for what im doing but admit i cannot stop.

cheers
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I'm a guy.

Have you thought of getting a hooker? Seriously, this is probably mainly from the fact that you've been a virgin your whole life, and although I'm not certain it would do any good at this point, you might as well go and shag someone, whether they're doing it for money or not.

I'll cover some things you probably already know now.. Masturbation releases endorphins, which can be addictive. Endorphins are also released from other things, such as exercise, eating, certain drugs. So instead of wanking in the morning, you could go for a run, and still get the endorphins, slowly cut down on the amount you do it, even to once a twice a day and you won't be that abnormal. You also might want to experiment with drugs, mdma/ecstacy cause a steady release of endorphins and can supress sexual potence, so that might be another distraction. Once you break the cycle if only for a little while you will find it a lot easier to smooth your way out of it, I imagine.

If you need to talk to other people about you wanking or whatever, go to a chat room dedicated for that purpose, at least that way you won't be telling some 12 year old boy about your pulsating ram.

You seem pretty sure that you CANNOT stop, well, you don't have to, it's something everyone does, it's just that you do it more. Have a bit more faith in yourself, cut back slowly, over a few weeks go from 4/5 a day to 3/4, etc etc. And make sure you don't wind up jumping out of the bushes masturbating at schoolgirls...

Uh..........You might need to go get some help.

I masterbate multiple times a day. But have never acted in the manner you are acting in.

Not to sound mean, but are you for real?

Cause I smell a troll.

im 100% for real why would i lie, i see a doc and therapist.

Well... if what your saying is for real then my first thought was... He cant stop himself from telling people, actually gets off on it so here he is telling people, maybe getting off on it, and asking women to reply. Your whisper problem on a grand scale sort of thing.

Go for the chemical castration. Maybe a little shock therapy for good measure. Having an addiction to masturbation is one thing, bringing other people into it is another. My children play WOW (closely monitored and not allowed to chat) and if I saw a tell from someone like you I would make sure you were on ignore and try to get your IP banned.

I'm a female and that sounds disturbing, not the masterbation but the fear of where you feel it may head, accidentally...

Firstly, of course you lose friends, if you tell them, and chat rooms or internet you have absolutely no idea who they are, correct, age, or sex and of course your going to lose them to...

So, your what? Stuck on your own ?

All addictions lead to damage of some sort. Anon's response is sensible, realistic and factual...

If you truly want assistance, then utilising your "mind" has to be the biggest and bestest thing to start with. How can a Doctor change that?

They can't... You can... So, changing your pattern and behaviour is a MUST, and rome wasn't built in a day, understandably, but each day, you can make a difference...

Walk away from the Computer, as soon as you feel like you want to tell someone, and the phone.

Instead, write a journal... Write it down and date it and the time... After a month see if from using a bit more will power, if the times on those days are getting less and less.

As, for what happened to you at school... This may be the core reason you are 1) a Virgin and 2) become compulsive with this behaviour but with additional addiction, the need and want to tell.

This in my opinion is where you should be seeking help. To establish why you are hanging on to it, and to work at letting that go.

It could be the reason that has lead you where you are and needs attention..

CW

actually. i have a girlfriend of mine that left her boyfriend that had that addiction to the point where he was doing it at work also. therapy...longterm therapy would be the only way to get to the "root" of the issue because your main problem isn't the masturbation itself..it's the part about having to let people know and of course the way you're doing that. and the trigger might not even have anything to do with sex. consider choosing a therapist that specializes more on psychodynamics. best of luck