Thread: PORN friend or foe

Posted by Anon:Basically, I agree with rcoreyus, with the addition that if the girlfriend dislikes porn, but doesn't give her man enough sexual attention, then she shares the responsibility for him watching it. If someones sexually neglected, they can be expected to get their kicks elsewhere.

Anon as per your above comment I agree to some extent. I think relationships are about respecting your partners needs and feelings and the girlfriend should respect the partners needs for sexual satisfaction but he should also respect her feelings re if she isn't comfortable with him watching porn. It is a give and take.

Sorry I didn't know how to attach your comment so copied and pasted, hope this works.

My bf used to really quite like a bit of porn. I didn't particularly mind, my main objection was not that it depicted sex, but that most of it was and didn't really have anything to offer me.

As our relationship has progressed, he seems much less interested in porn, in fact when we moved house he gave practically all of it away.

Looking at naked men is fun. Thinking about a sexy man while masturbating or having sex is even more fun. And imagining him naked.

I agree with all that has been stated above. Porn is a wonderful outlet when there is not "outlet". Its a great addition to foreplay too. I enjoy both visual stimulation with porn as well as erotic literature. The line must be drawn to underage pics and vids as well. For masturbation purposes I can't say whether or not a partner needs to know but I'm sure it doesn't hurt. We all need our release at times and sometimes time doesn't premit coupling.

I think one big problem with porn is that people equate sex to love. Two different things. Love enhances sex but is not a precursor.

If sex is taking a back seat to porn in a relationship then there is a problem. Otherwise, what is the problem? Jealousy? Fear? Low self esteem? It would seem to me that in cases like this, porn is not the problem, it just brings the problem out.

I agree that if a person wishes their partner not watch porn, there needs to be a respect for said partners wishes BUT, what about the porn watching partners wishes?

There's nothing wrong with watching porn. Yes, as an addiction and the only way someone can get off, then it can be damaging. But when used as a tool between partners or even as a sole endeavor, nothing wrong with it. We all have the things that turn us on and as long as nobody's getting hurt in the process (as in child porn which is NEVER OKAY), then it's fine.

I just joined to look for help in the sex desire department....

One comment in porn....

I have the lowest libido of anyone I personally know... and well, porn sometimes is the only thing that gets me into a sexual mood. I watch it with my boyfriend and believe it is healthy for us to watch it together occasionally

DH and I enjoyed the "Better Sex" series and it gave us a lot of ideas that we use in our sexual life. We have watched "porn" and both agree that the typical moves from one sex position to the next and have the men(s) masturbate on the woman's face is.... I don't know. Disgusting? Boring? Predictable and ? Neither of us likes that.

Some porn is more "tasteful" *no men masturbating on women anyway. We also have watched lesbian porn which at least has women reaching Orgasm. Hard to avoid I suppose. DH doesn't care for Gay porn but does like the Lesbian stuff. I'm ok with it and some of it is exciting which is odd since I'm not interested in sex with other women. I'm not interested in group sex with but its erotic to watch a threesome even if I'll never do that.

It appears to me that the majority on here who have voiced an opinion believe (like myself) that porn can have it's place.

I also agree that anything involving anyone under the age of 18 is TOTALLY WRONG!

I think that the poster who cited all the statistics is somewhat misinformed as well. I have seen a lot of porn in my life and the statements that person made well, they just don't reflect reality in many cases.

My wife will occasionally "look at" porn for a fleeting moment here or there, but in general, she is not a fan. She knows I check it out regularly and I make no effort to hide it if I do, but she has no problem with that. I think like some others, have stated, that she and I find that if there's sex with a guy ejaculating on a woman's face...that's just degrading.

Sometimes if I see something I think is amazing, I'll say "honey come here and check this out..." she will check it out and we usually have a laugh over it.

It's just not unhealthy for us. We've been happily married for 22 years, and I have never committed adultery, never have any intention of doing so. If anything I think that porn has taught people that there's a lot of options out there and as long as 2 ADULTS consent to doing anything in the name of "love, lust or just plain old sex", it's all good.

Cheers.