Do You Get as Much Sex as You Want?

**owlhunter** · 07-29-2008 08:21 PM

My lady friend and I have a constant discussion on this. I'd like to hear what you women out there have to say.

For women in "permanent relationships"- say longer than 1 year. And how about women over 30.

Do you get as much sex as you want from your male partner? And is it "they way you like it?" The way you like it is completely up to you, and I don't even care to know what way that is.

Of the couples my lady and I know (know well enough that we would know the answer to the question) it seems to me (a male) that frequently it is the female side of the partnership gets less sex than she wants.

We men are supposed to be the ones who are always sex crazed, but my feeling is that once a steady relationship is developed, it is the female member who is left wanting.

I'm not trying to make value judgements, or anything like that. I'm just curious. I was brought up in an age and in a family where women who actually WANTED sex had to be sluts/s.

Boy has it taken me a long timeto recover from that programming. Actually, I still have to fight it, but now I win that fight most of the time.

If you are in a same-sex relationship I'd like to hear your comments too. Just please make it clear what sex you are. It get confusing here sometimes.

(How do you put the smilies wherever you want them in a post? Could not figure that out. Dugh!)

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 07-29-2008 08:39 PM

Well i've just lost my copy and paste have to work that out later.

If you are quoting owlhunter, before you click post quick reply, (go advanced) instead, all the icons are there, click on what you like and it will appear on the post.

In your own Thread, they are on the right hand side, same thing click and it should go to post.

I've been single for 14 months dam..n, but i was married for 7 years, engaged before that etc, etc, etc.

Men are horny so they can just do it, but problem is when a woman "gets it" she is alive the next 24hrs and wants it again, where i think a man can just say well i filled my need. She's craving for more...

I can say i was the dominant wanted more all the time, but not just "sex" for the sake of it, that is like feeling like a s........t, used...

I noted however, that once done, i could do it again 2hrs later, but he wasn't really that into it, more like 24hrs and only if i made the approach, even in a "new" lustful start of a relationship.

**Happy1** · 07-29-2008 08:59 PM

Im not in a relationship now so....no I dont get it enough hehe

. But I was married and with my husband for seven years. I have to say that I rejected his advances often because he didnt do things...the way I wanted them done. I realize that sounds a little harsh but he wouldnt take any suggestions nor flat out telling him what feels good and what doesnt, so no I didnt get what I wanted often enough. And we are divorced now....go figure

**Phoebee** · 07-29-2008 09:27 PM

Humm... Yes, I grew up thinking women "into" sex were trash or slutty. I've been married 18 years and we have had issues with sex. *His health and so on. And I had to initiate sex (or go insane) and I found that repressing all that is hard not to do but... It is rather . I do prefer him to make the advances but I try to be open about things and we have been willing to try a little more then Intercourse / oral sex. As long as its not S&M, wife swapping etc.

What we are trying to do is find a good middle ground so neither of us is upset over the lack of sex.

**Sweet Lady** · 07-30-2008 06:32 AM

I have been married for over 5 years, above 30 and have just realised I am not get enough!!

I have a baby now and have to juggle giving her attention and pleasing my hubby (and myself). Getting my daughter to fall asleep is quite something. Most of the time hubby will fall asleep before she does and then it makes it difficult to romp. (One night we were so horny we couldn't wait for her to sleep. With the lights off we went spooning softly^_^!!!)

Once every +-2 months we take weekends out to just be alone. I think the old I get the more I want.

(how do you put those smilies? When I click on them they appear on the message title).

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 07-30-2008 06:44 AM

Sweet Lady
(how do you put those smilies? When I click on them they appear on the message title).

I am not sure if you have to reach 50 posts, VIP member to activate them?

But you should be able to click on them on the right and they appear here...

MMM, the above have been here longer, if you don't get a reply then post that question on WH thread to get the answer.

You need smiles

**muskito** · 07-30-2008 08:20 AM

I have been married for more then 10 years and I did not get much of sex. I have had a few other partners who were more entertaining since.

But I agree, once a woman gets going, just one little intercourse is by far not enough to satisfy her.

Most guys go off like a raket, turn around and snore! Must be something in their body.

We ladies can go on for hours! Maybe we should take several guys to bed!

Seriously, I believe there is a fundamental difference in the way women and men function and this is the main reason of us ladies lying there all warmed up next to a snoring parting. Well who ever said life is perfect?

**SorridLives** · 07-30-2008 08:52 AM

Over 30 here (by a long shot) and in a newer relationship for a while (now married)....I would say that I have about as much sex as I want and usually have the sort of sex, right positions, etc., or whatever, I want.

**owlhunter** · 07-30-2008 08:56 AM

Hey ladies, thanks for all the comments. Reading the replies it reminded me of the discussions I have had with my lady. As you have rightly said, we man, after having an O, just want to roll over and go to sleep. We are wasted.

My lady says that when she has an O, it just reinvigorates her, and she wants more, and more and more. Strange we are made that way.

I'm on meds that make it almost impossible to have an O. Sad for me (and my lady) but it does mean that I almost never roll over and go to sleep. :-)

Another picture she and I have "developed." I tell her that men, especially, are, when it comes to sex, like a hand gernade with the pin pulled. It does not take much and BOOM, we go off.

Women are like a symphony orchestra. If on "instrument" is out of tune (something not completely right in the environment, etc.) then the music sounds like and is not enjoyable. I think more men should have this explained to them. If they are really interested in pleasing their woman then they may be more aware of how complicated a woman's attitude towards sex is, compared to theirs (the man's).

I try very hard to not "roll over and go to sleep" even though many times that is my natural desire. I know that she needs wants cuddles and warmth after intercourse (is that a banned word?). It is all part of the package.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not bragging/saying I'm such a great lover. I'm just trying to explain how I try to think/act.

I also know she likes "surprises" like when I come up behind her when she is cooking, lift her skirt and .... Who cares if the dinner is ruined. Or in the parking lot of a nice hotel after we have come back from a nice evening out. Right up against the side of the car.

My biggest problem is I have ED problems which frequently preclude me from "doing"what I'd like to do when I want to do it. But we get by.

Thanks for all your comments and I look forward to reading more.

The most important thing in a relationship it to communicate. It takes a lot of work - has been difficult for me to learn to feel comfortable doing, but I keep working on it. Same for her.

(Still working on my smilies) , they will only appear at the post heading!!!)

**Phoebee** · 07-31-2008 10:18 AM

Owlhunter if its not too snoopy what meds are you taking that does this? I have an internet friend whose husband was taking some kind of depression meds and they switched to WellbrutenXL and it kept his depression in check but let him have a normal sex life.

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