wanting more

**Machine** · 08-01-2008 03:46 AM

Hello everyone I am new here and been reading this forum and is very informative. I am a male 33 just married (4 months) and she is 36.

I have the opposite problem as to what you ladies are saying you are not getting enough. I almost alway want it (i can have it 3x a day) and she doesn't feel that way. We have sex about 2x a week, but thats not enough for me. When we were going out about 2 years ago WOW it was great. It is still GREAT "when we do it" but is just not enough. I didn't want to hear "NO" anymore so I wait until you want me or I feel that is a good time. I get " I am Tried " alot and I really hate to hear that really. And i don't know what to do and I don't want to be angry about something like this. I kinda can't help it.... and start to think what am i going to do.

Before I got married I was a type that I like to go out and "play" Since I met her i have been serious and have not play around at ALL. Really, I am really into her. She is the one who can satify my body and soul. Now I don't know what to do, a bit of my bad self is trying to come out. Don't get me wrong this girl is the girl that can and is totally rocked my world, but it has changed a bit. And yes i hate to say it I am a bit upset but i know i shouldn't. I just feel that i might get even less and less. OMG what am i going to do. The less I get the more my bad self wanna comeout.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-01-2008 03:54 AM

Now, now, don't start talking about affairs this early in the marriage, geez..... lol...

Let's say she is tired. Let's just say. Why? Is it "it's not you it's me trick", or is she overloaded with work and other things?

I appreciate you were a "player" a lot of guys are until they settle with "the one", although i always think that he should "respect" the woman and not "use" as such but....

So, do you make her feel like she's just there for sex?

Do you make her feel like a woman, or is it just all crazy horny sex that both feel good about but that's it.

Do you pay attention to her outside the bedroom, ie) laugh, go out, hang out, share things, take turns sometimes in cooking.

Sometimes, a woman can feel way too much like a maid as well, and remembers the fun times and wants them as well.

Throwing you lots i know but hey?

CW

**Machine** · 08-01-2008 04:10 AM

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

Now, now, don't start talking about affairs this early in the marriage, geez..... lol...

Let's say she is tired. Let's just say. Why? Is it "it's not you it's me trick", or is she overloaded with work and other things?

I appreciate you were a "player" a lot of guys are until they settle with "the one", although i always think that he should "respect" the woman and not "use" as such but....

So, do you make her feel like she's just there for sex?

Do you make her feel like a woman, or is it just all crazy horny sex that both feel good about but that's it.

Do you pay attention to her outside the bedroom, ie) laugh, go out, hang out, share things, take turns sometimes in cooking.

Sometimes, a woman can feel way too much like a maid as well, and remembers the fun times and wants them as well.

Throwing you lots i know but hey?

CW

And no I am not trying to say "affair" just venting !!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, I really take care of her. I think we have alot in common we go out alot and just have fun hanging out might even do nothing. I believe i am the nicest to her compare to all the girls i dated. I share me with her and I normally don't do that. I help around the house and what not. She work like a normal person "mon to fri" 8-5 sometime saturday too, but not all the time maybe once a month.

About the "player" commit. I have try hard not to lied to a girl. I alway just try to have a open and what I call not serious relationship. I really try hard not to miss led people. However things to go wrong I have to say and feeling do get hard at times. Including my....................

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-01-2008 04:15 AM

I wasn't insinuating don't worry, that you would have an affair, slight Australian humor....

Well, let's let other's reply i feel..

CW

**anonymouswhitefemale** · 08-01-2008 07:04 AM

It seems a bit like you're in one of those relationships where the woman pretends to enjoy sex for your sake, as something to ensure that you are hers for other reasons, emotional/financial support, security etc. At the beginning of the relationship the sex was great, but steadily decreases over time. Once you agree to marry her, she's already got you to sign the contract, she doesn't need to try that hard to sexually please you any more, hence she becomes lazy.

If the sex sucks after 4 months of marriage how the helI is it going to hold up after ten years? It's probably too late to rationalise this decision as you have already become emotionally invested, but it's my opinion that you might be better off finding another woman who is your sexual equal, otherwise you're just setting yourself up for a life of frustration, and she won't be happy either since you'll be taking out your irritation upon her in every other layer of the marriage.

But then, I tell everyone to break up with each other all the time, so take it with a pinch of salt.

**rcoreyus** · 08-01-2008 09:24 AM

Unfortunately you are in a pretty common situation. As a married guy, all I can say is "twice a week - you lucky dog!", I am down to something like 1-2/month (and there are other men on this list who would consider me lucky).

Like you I am good to my wife.

I'm very sorry you are in this spot - but it may not get any better.

**Merry** · 08-01-2008 11:22 AM

Maybe you should suggest counseling to her, she might get the message that this is important to you. You probably need to at least sit down with her and ask why she has lost interest. If you don't confront the issue, it will never be resolved.

**Machine** · 08-01-2008 12:28 PM

Thank you all. The funny thing is this, I have talk about sex way before we got married. According to her she enjoys sex and she enjoys me. How do I know because she is one of the lucky few that can "cum" during intercourse and I am a lucky few who can at least make her cum once everytime we have sex if not more. Trust me guys and girls I have thought about this in many angles and I thought it was me or like the other poster said "maybe she lied about sex". However, when we do have sex WOW. Last week there was a time I made her cum 4 time during one sex session and I enjoyed it too. Then I didn't get any for about a week. WTF?????? I just don't understand it.

**Machine** · 08-01-2008 12:32 PM

Originally Posted by Merry

Maybe you should suggest counseling to her, she might get the message that this is important to you. You probably need to at least sit down with her and ask why she has lost interest. If you don't confront the issue, it will never be resolved.

I tried that Merry. I dance around it, I made it into a joke and joke about it. We kinda talk about it. However, I didn't really come at her hard with it. Tied her down to a chair and duked it out. ahhahahaha Of course I didn't do that. When we were dateing we would do it all the time. Just don't know what happened. It SUCKS.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-01-2008 03:39 PM

As i said in the other post before you started this thread, that was the "lustful stages", where sex of any sort with the guy your lusting after is magical and you just do it.

Your sex drive obviously, is way higher than hers and as that lustful stage wore down to normal relationship, she's tappered off.

But, the question i asked is, as a sexually "frustrated person" whom enjoys it way more, how do you approach her for sex, do you make her feel like "here he goes again, wants my body, just needs sex, i feel like a doll or something"...

It doesn't matter how connected you two are when you do it, it it's more of how she feels about wanting you too.

Women don't like feeling like a "body", rather that it's an emotional connection that ends up like heaven each time, out of love, not a booty call....

CW

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