I was wondering I am a 36 yr old female
that is still a virgin(never had penetration or orgasm)
I am currently single and have been for a while
of course I have family members and friends I have not seen in a
bit that think I am a lesbian, I am totally all for men, just have not found that
right guy yet! i am ok with me not being with someone but just being thought of
like that, and having people I am not a women because I have not had sex yet
open for advice on how to respond to people when they approach me

Of course you're a real woman, sex has no bearing on who you are. Well, it might a bit, but not in such definate terms.

As for how to be open? I don't know, don't be mean to people, smile, pretend to be interested in what people have to say, laugh at their jokes even if they're not funny...

Erm, really, it depends completely on who you are talking to.

Yikes, these people are your friends and family? Bleh, who cares if you havent had sex yet? Tell them the reason you told us - you havent found the right man yet. Thats a perfectly good reason and there is no need to justify it.

Unfortunately, in contrast the fairy tales - the 'right man' just doesnt fall onto your lap or have a neon sign saying 'im your man' .... youve got to get out there and look.... do you have any hobbies? Expand your social networks, join a group / club / class. Try to be confident, in a classy way, not an arrogant way.

Best of luck.