oldest going to college - wife not letting go

[N01]

Hi all,

our oldest has gone away to college (only 45 miles away) and my XYL has gotten a little wiggy about it. I picked him up from college yesterday for the long weekend and so he could go to his Dr because he's feeling a little sick. being the typical 18 year old guy, he left his bag on the dining room table, said hi to everyone, then grabbed the car and left.

Not a big deal until his mom found out that he immediately drove to pick up his girlfriend and took her with him to the Dr's office. She launched! even more so after she found out that she went into the exam room with him.

now maybe because I'm a guy I just don't understand, but why get so crazy about it? he's 18 years old! Now he may not be the most wordly but he's an adult (I think) even though she spent about 15 minutes yelling at me this morning saying he wasn't and that she should have been with him instead.

I gave his GF a heads up this morning that his mom was a little crabby and that she was "stealing his baby" in her eyes, but to play it on the down low and not be worried too much about it.

To the point, is there anything I could do or say to get her to start to let go?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I don't know what it is but, boys are always "Mummy's Boys" and girls are always "Princesses to their Daddy", reverse it... Your daughter went to the Doctor, she is 18 and her boyfriend went in the room for the exam.. WT? You'd have kittens.

I think Mother's have a real hard time letting go of their Sons, just as much...

And, the girlfriend is always the wicked witch of the west.

Just speak to your Son privately and ask him to include "some" things still with Mum, and some together with her and the girlfriend, like she comes over because their going to go out somewhere, but he says " hey, have a coffee with us Mum, before we go", that way she won't see this girlfriend and the next as a threat rather joining in and that her Son is growing up.

CW

[MissGoddess]

Ah yes my boyfriend and I had a great relationship with eachother's parents. I loved his parents and they treated me like part of the family. Same with my parents and boyfriend. It helps a lot that I am always able and willing to carry on a conversation with the parents, and add a couple of jokes in there to keep things cheery. Yeah, I'll admit, at first my dad was like "oh my little princess is growing apart from us.." But I always made sure to invite my boyfriend over for dinner, or if my family and I went out somewhere, I'd ask him to tag along.. Then he would do the same thing so we were involved with the families a lot. Not a whole lot to where we couldnt have privacy or anything [man that would be horrible] but enough to make them feel included and not forgotten :]
his family is my 2nd family and mine is the same for him. Don't treat his GF like a stranger or an acquaintance.. Make her feel welcome. That will make the mother understand that the GF isnt trying to "steal" him away, if I make any sense..

[N01]

Thanks CW and MG, I've chatted with the lad about that and he said he understood. We'll see if he follows through.

Oh, and FYI I would not have kittens if MJ did the same. Life time incarceration after the trial probably, but not kittens