Question for those porn watchers

[Hopeless Dork]

Hey, I watch it too. This isn't one of those "mad at it" posts. I actually like to watch it sometimes ... alone. I am pretty sure my boyfriend watches it sometimes (I know he has it, don't know how much he watches etc).

I wouldn't mind watching it with him, and was actually thinking it might be fun to see what he likes. I guess the only thing that keeps me from bringing it up is the fear that I would look like chopped liver to him compared to those beautiful, perfect girls on the screen.

I work very hard on my body but I know I can't compare to them. I know that even if I am not in the room when he watches I still wont compare but I wonder if it would be more obvious if I was sitting right there next to him while hes watching. Do you know what I mean?

I know when I look at porn I am turned on by watching them enjoying sexual acts, occasionally by the way a body looks but mostly just by watching them experiencing pleasure. I don't look at the mans abs and think my bfs are rubbish by comparison. So I don't know why I worry that he would feel that way.

I guess my question would be, to those of you that do watch porn, what is it about it that turns you on? Does it ever make you feel like your significant other isn't as attractive those you watch? Do you think it causes you feel less happy being with a normal girl , not a perfect fantasy one?

[WildChild]

You are real, they aren't and he knows it. For them it's a job. Look at how detacted and bored most of them look. There is a world of difference between an enthusiastic real partner and an image on the screen.

[cmoneileena1]

I would not worry overly much about having him "compare" you with the girls he sees while watching porn. Those are just images and YOU are the real thing, alive, warm and breathing not some picture. My hubby says that most men are really only looking at body parts when they watch porn and they are not looking at the whole woman at all. If he appreciates you and loves you as you are then he is probably not doing any comparing. As always it depends on the man but if he has never said anything about wanting you to look this way or that way then he probably never thinks about it.

Given that, a fun idea if you really want to get into watching porn with him but think that it would be awkward is to have a "porn party". My college friends and I used to have them. Now don't freak out because the idea was not to have a massive orgy but actually to make fun of the porn! You watch (and we used to get really ridiculous stuff) saying thing like... "that HAS to be airbrushed" or "THOSE aren't real..." you get the idea. It is a way to introduce porn into your connected love life without feeling like there is pressure to have sex or be like the actors. Also watching and laughing WITH him allows you both to communicate how you both actually feel about what you are seeing. And if a sexual encounter happens... then it is a bonus!

[SinisterUrge]

Now don't freak out because the idea was not to have a massive orgy but actually to make fun of the porn! You watch (and we used to get really ridiculous stuff) saying thing like... "that HAS to be airbrushed" or "THOSE aren't real..." you get the idea.

Watching porn MST3K-style* is a national past time for stoners.

"Aargh! Thar she blows matey!"

"OMG, Is her left fake tit bigger than the right?"

"It was colonel Mustard in the closet with the candlestick!"

"Look at that pathetic handjob technique. This is what happens when you send your daughters to all-girl schools"

"Mmm-Hmm I like to use a sling-blade. Some people call it a Kaiser-blade but I still call it a sling-blade. Mmm-Hmm."

"My papa wasn't much for the rodeo. He was a ed good roper tho'. He always said rodeo were fa**ots." "I wish I knew how to quit you!"

*If you have never seen MST3K [my what a sheltered person you've been], 'Mystery Science Theatre 3000' was a long running low-budget television show the plot of which is that a janitor & three robots are stuck in a space station and forced to watch really terrible movies by evil scientists. So the show would show this really bad movie with the outlines of this guy and three robots would be on the bottom fourth of the screen (like they were sitting ahead of you at the movies) and they'd talk loudly over the movie. Hilarity unsued.

If you've never seen it rent an episode on DVD sometime. My favorites include 'Santa Claus Conquers the Martians', 'Cave Dwellers', 'Mitchell' and they even watch the worst movie ever made 'Manos: The Hands of Fate'

[MissyMasters]

I am very new her - and hope you don't mind if I jump in on this, but porn is here to stay, I don't get it, don't understand it - but it is a huge industry. It would have been shut down a long time ago everybody thought it was obscene and disgusting.

Its all over the internet and look at any magazine stand. It's probably the only recession proof industry. SEX JUST SELLS - and people buy it.

[lovemyself1]

hopeless dork...i think that when most men watch porn, they get turned on by the basic act of sex. watching a man and woman have sex...i'm sure he's not thinking "oh wow, she's so much hotter than my girl." I dont think you have anything to worry about. remember that men are very visual when it comes to sex. they're usually lookin at her boobs and vajayjay, not her cellulite free thighs. I've seen a lot of porn...i mean a lot of it...and i've seen so many women on there that have cellulite. it just reminds me that we all have our imperfections, the porn industry might just cover up those flaws, but they are still there.

[Richard S]

The main thing I like to look at when I watch porn is how different women give oral. No two of them do it the exact same way. With the prevalence of web sites where people can upload their own movies, you get to see real people in their most private moments. That's what me and my wife watch most often. Every human being has a sexual side to their nature. Porn gives an imagined sense of power, to be able to pull back the curtain and see people acting on their basic desire to be intimate with each other.

Also, it's not really that the women are "perfect" that draws a guy in. Men usually have a type they keep coming back to. Maybe it's brunette's with long hair wearing garter belts and heels while they give oral. Hopefully you are your BF's type, and you just need the garter belt and heels to make it complete.

[Tabatha S.]

I have watched porn with my husband. Early in our marriage I once made a comment that one of the guys reminded me of an old boyfriend. Just a tip, don't anyone ever do that.
I watch it now and I guess I do sometimes compare anatomy with my spouse, and I know it's not fair.... but I am just being honest. I can't say that my husband does or doesn't do the same thing.... he seems to get turned on more with the oral scenes than the intercourse ones.

Anyone have a favorite?

[lovepuns]

my wife and i enjoy porn together and i have never compared her to anyone while we have sex..thats the furthest thing from my mind. i like when she watches porn while i do her, sometimes it really helps her get off good. i don't really watch the porno during sex, i more or less glance at it occasionally.keeping my focus on getting her across the finish line.
i just want to say that in my case, i had an unreasonable, unreal expectations about what a woman should look like from the time i was, say 14 until around 25 yrs. old. i guess from tv and magazines and what not. back then it was about the body and look, but now its all about the act. i actually prefer the amature and homemade stuff because the women actually are enjoying themselves not putting on an act. i can see through that stuff, i would rather see a women bite down on her lip and really get at it, than a barbie doll pouting out her lips and fake moans trying to look sexy. if your boyfriend is a normal guy he will think it is awsome that you want to watch porn with him..it sounds like you have the makings for a great lover and he shouldn't have any hang ups about that.

[SinisterUrge]

Anyone have a favorite?

The two I recommend for other people is always Pirates and Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge. Both available on DVD and Blu*Ray.

Very high budget (I think Pirates was the largest budget adult film ever made), halfway decent acting, funny, great sex scenes, special effects (how many other porn movies have a sword fight with CGI skeletons?)

Obviously NSFW.