Need Advice - Are we weird???

[ImConfused2]

My boyfirend and I are in our late 40's and have great sex together. He likes using toys on me, slapping my butt until it's red, lots of oral and anal sex, and getting rim jobs. All these are ok with me because they excite him so much and I'm kinda kinky too at times and he always works hard to please me too. My question is - are we weird liking these things in the bedroom or do lots of couples do the same and just not talk about it? He has never not stopped when I ask him to, and does no hurt me (well maybe a little) and I know he would never harm me. Are we freaks or just having fun like everyone else? I mean we look like your next door neighbors but we are kinky in bed!!! Plus he tells me he watches amatuer pron on the pc sometimes when I'm asleep and JO's...no emails or conversations though. He just likes sex daily and is dominant....Thoughts please.....

[Hopeless Dork]

If you are happy, you are normal There is nothing too kinky between too consenting adults, add a loving relationship to that and you have all the right to explore pleasing each other in every imaginable way.

Those sweet neighbors you have next to you, you might think they are a snooze fest in the bed and all the while they are swinging from chandeliers lol, you just never now. And that wild couple you see going out all the time might come home and knit while watching america's funniest home videos.

Whatever works for the both of you is normal, the honest you guys share and both of your willingness to explore and respect bounderies sounds like you have an awesome relationship. Enjoy it and don't worry what the world would think if they peeked into your bedroom window, they'd probably like it anyway

[rcoreyus]

Well the sex-toy industry is a big business, so there must be a lot of people buying and using them. If you go to the high end toy stores, a lot of the toys are kinky, some REALLY KINKY. People wouldn't make them if no one was buying.

There is only one couple whos habits I happen to know (other than me and my wife of course), and they are definitely into bondage, whips chains, the whole deal.

So, if you are both having fun, go for it.

[marycate]

I am a bit older than you but what you two do sounds tame to me. Our sex normally lasts about 2 to 3 hours, hurt my arm real bad last week falling off the bed. Had to make up a "nice" story to explain my arm to my 26 year old daughter LOL
Jut go for it, enjoy it.

[Greydog72]

I think you are both very lucky. Sounds that you have a caring relationship with each other and are very considerate of each others needs. I agree with what all have said that it's all normal. If you have not read in other threads, there are so many other couple trying to make their relationship better or just trying to keep it going. For a couple to be in their 40s and still going strong is great. Good Luck

[skipper]

Well, if you are kinky, then we are too. We do all the wonderfully fun things you do except my wife doesn't like to get spanked so hard it makes her cute butt red.

Perhaps a smaller % of women engage in anal sex.

In summary, I think you are in good company. It's a kinky world out there!

[SinisterUrge]

Having great sex with lots of variety is good. No, its great.

*Most people never even try things because they think they are dirty or immoral. I'm guessing 98% of everyone would really enjoy being rimmed (aka. analingus) but 90% of people will never know because there is that mental block.

*Lets say you, hypothetically, try something really extremely gross or taboo and enjoy it (For arguements sake: You were walked naked on all fours on a leash at a sex club and made to poo in a liter-box before performing fellatio on your BF in full view of 20 people while wearing a blindfold). I'm going to guess you would take that secret to your grave... so would everyone else. Thats why nobody talks about it. Only since nobody talks about anything kinky even the tame stuff seems arre (Your boss has a foot fetish?! OMGWTFBBQ!!1!)

*If at any time in the future you two even consider "harder" S&M-play than a simple spanking or having your hands tied to the bedposts, at that point please, please, please, PLEASE check your egos & jealousy issues at the door and consult a professional. Before you buy that leather paddle (the one that has 'SPANK' spelled-out in chrome studs), experiment with sounding rods, or invest in a PES "electrical stimulation device" (aka. nipple & testicle electrocution machine) make a call to someone who can tell you all about using it so you don't become one of those people who arrive at the ER at 3am. No, nobody really believes you were mopping the kitchen naked and happened to fall and impale yourself on your Swiffer® handle anyway.

-In major cities you can meet experienced people into the lifestyle at things called a MUNCH (which people dress in plain clothes and meet at a restaurant every month or so ), or easier and probably better: Consult Craigslist (or whoever) and find a pro-dominatrix. They love working with couples (and they get to drop the whole "evil " act) and have bruised far more asses than anyone has a right to. They can show you how to do it safely and at $200/hour you can usually test-drive their expensive toys before buying your own (who knew that $2500 Sonny Black spanking bench would just collect dust because Over-the-knee is just so much more sexy?)

[gardngrl]

My husband and I are in our 30’s and we engage in all of the things you describe. We love it. In fact I like to call him at work and thank him for his level of “kink”. I think age and being comfortable with your partner causes you to enjoy different things. It’s not that I didn’t try things when I was younger but I am more comfortable with myself and my husband each passing year. I feel that I could say I wanted to try anything (apart from animals and other people) and he would at least give a few tries before he decided it was or wasn’t for him. Also we both can say no I didn’t really care for that without fear of disappointing our spouse. We are both just happy to be with someone who is willing to try new things. So yes I think that’s normal (and terrific!).

[alicat]

variety is the spice of life, if it's consensual and nobody is getitng hurt, then go for it.

signed

your kinky next door neighbors






j/k LOL

[happy ending]

you arent the only one in your naughty forties - trust me!!! LOL