Horribly rude sister - Help :(

[kgo]

Okay, here is a little background info: my grammie lives with us, she left my grampy a long time ago (alcohol, abuse) and came to live with us. She does our laundry, cooks and helps out a lot.

My sister is 14 years old, 4 years younger than I, she is bad and rude to my mom and grandmother. I always had my "tiffs" but they were nothing like these. My sister has a lot of mental "fears" (I'm quite certain she has OCD, she has to have everything lined up and perfect and has panic attacks if they aren't) She also can't go into hospitals without fainting, and she's just spoiled and doesn't appreciate things. She was paid 10$ an hour my mom paid her for doing some jobs she needed done at work. Now my sister will not find a job because she believes that she's too good for fast food and that min. wage isn't worth 'walking out the door for' and when I was her age, I worked for 3 years already delivering papers and at a fast food joint and worked hard for my money.

My father is a truck driver, and only home on weekends and some nights through the week . He spoils her rotten and when my mother disciplines her he 'undoes' it and spoils her. She is a star athlete (in first year high school and been asked to train with the university teams to condition her) and she is always recieving a lot of praise for that.

Here's the problem:

when my mother says no that she can't have a friend over, or something else like that my sister will freak out and call her an (EDITED) and maybe other harsh words. It's especially bad if she's around friends. She does it kind of behind my moms back and when she gets upset, she SNAPS everytime and goes all out.

She is rude to my grammy too, she won't come down and her own laundry and she's just not nice at all. Snobby, I guess. Well tonight, her and this friend of hers were with my mother and grammie in the car, and my mom went out of the vehicle for 15 minutes. Her and her friend decided to rock the car as hard as they could and my grammie got very scared and asked them to stop. My grandmother was very shoken up by this and she told my mom about it when she got back and my sister said to my grammie 'shut up, we didn't do anything wrong' in her snobby voice and then my grammie says "no, you never do anything wrong" and my sister mouths(edited) ....and my mom seen but lucky for her my grammy didn't hear.

Now my main concern is the feelings of my grammie, but this also has a bad effect on myself. I'm embarassed of my sister and how she treats everyone. I also feel guilty about always rushing about and not stopping to talk to my grammie as often as I should, since I work 2 jobs and have a boyfriend that lives an hour away (makes me very busy) but I do sit and talk to her sometimes.

My father doesn't beleive my sister has any problems, and just says "oh you shouldn't do that" and they aren't hard on her. I really think she needs consuelling, she's even rude to kids at school for the littlest things. Shes catty, snobby and ALWAYS has to be in the middle of the drama no matter where she goes.

To everyone who read this, thank you so much. I appreciate it, because I am so worked up and anxious about all of this that's going on. My dad treats it like a small deal, and my mom just freaks out like my sister does. I don't know what to do.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

It's great that you are worried for your grammy....

But, if the Adults can't stop her nor can you.......

In time, she will grow up but because your sister's doesn't mean she is like you, or you like her.

It's great that you worked hard for your money, it means you are a survivor and always will be and you will cope well in life.

All you can do is continue being you, continue talking to your grammy when ever you can and unfortunately, ignore what your sister is doing because the Adults are letting her get away with it, and it will just eat you up in the end, consume you.

Live your own life. People around you know that there are two sisters, one is chalk and the other is cheese.

CW

[acerousme]

Hey there!!
Im ACE-resident sweetheart...lol

I've gone through a lot of this with my family. My OLDEST sister was able to get away with everything...and would call my mom names...and beat the out of her.

How I dealt with it, was I got mad...REALLY mad. I ended up kicking the out of her.

but dont do that...you need to tell her though exactly how she sounds, though!!! How she is treating people is going to get her into a LOT of trouble when she reaches the legal age...many will not put up with it...so it is up to you to tell her to smarten up.

as for your parents...thats a tough one. I've always been given what I want, but thats because my dad was never really "in the picture"...so he felt bad. Try talking to your folks about it...tell them that you think it is unfair how she treats them. Its all you can do really.

DO NOT, I REPEAT...DO NOT TRY TO PICK A FIGHT...always ends bad, lol

xxx