advice on choosing a school?

[luvmyhubs86]

Something my hubs and I have been talking about a lot is school. We are Christian, though no particular denomination, and we worry about him being taught doctrines we don't believe in or it being the kind of school I went to that was downright racist and had all sorts of weird rules and ideas. With public school we worry about quality of academics (at least where I live it is an issue) as well as safety and also do not like the thought of all of the "social" teachings that we hear about in public schools such as way-too-young sex ed and preachyness about excepting all kinds of things we probably don't agree with. I feel that kind of thing should be left to the parent to teach them. With "private" school we find that many are expensive and some tended to be a lot more new-age than we'd like. I (not so sure about my hubs) support homeschooling but did not have much success with it for myself because I'm not very self-motivated and thrived on competition.

I'd like to know what experiences and discoveries you guys have had with searching for the right school? Also, I wonder if a lot of the stuff I hear is true. That public schools tend to have more violence and less quality education than private schools? I am not trying to pick a fight about schools, I just want to hear about some experiences. I know different parents look for different things. Basically, I'd like to find a school that is the closest thing to a normal, old-fashioned school as possible. Somewhere that is safe, has good academics that will prepare him for college and that doesn't focus on instilling tons of social ideas in his head but that focuses truly on education.

[LanaBear]

Have you looked into magnet schools or charter schools? Not sure if they are available in your area.

We too faced this dilemma. Public or private. There are pros and cons to both. We got pretty fortunate with the community where we bought our house, the community has their own public school, a portion of our association fees go towards the school, etc. So as a community we are pretty involved in the school. Even though it is a public school, they wear uniforms and I've been pleased with the school so far.

We still have the private school option on the table as there are quite a few where we live, some that are non denominational, etc. But as long as his current school is being ran as is, we'll keep them there.

It's a tough choice, but know whatever you decide, your parenting at home is a key factor in their life.

[SinisterUrge]

Something my hubs and I have been talking about a lot is school. We are Christian, though no particular denomination, and we worry about him being taught doctrines we don't believe in or it being the kind of school I went to that was downright racist and had all sorts of weird rules and ideas. With public school we worry about quality of academics (at least where I live it is an issue) as well as safety and also do not like the thought of all of the "social" teachings that we hear about in public schools such as way-too-young sex ed and preachyness about excepting all kinds of things we probably don't agree with. I feel that kind of thing should be left to the parent to teach them. With "private" school we find that many are expensive and some tended to be a lot more new-age than we'd like. I (not so sure about my hubs) support homeschooling but did not have much success with it for myself because I'm not very self-motivated and thrived on competition.

I'd like to know what experiences and discoveries you guys have had with searching for the right school? Also, I wonder if a lot of the stuff I hear is true. That public schools tend to have more violence and less quality education than private schools? I am not trying to pick a fight about schools, I just want to hear about some experiences. I know different parents look for different things. Basically, I'd like to find a school that is the closest thing to a normal, old-fashioned school as possible. Somewhere that is safe, has good academics that will prepare him for college and that doesn't focus on instilling tons of social ideas in his head but that focuses truly on education.

I attended a Catholic school through eighth grade, and then switched to a public highschool. So here are some of my observations:

*Church funded schools may not have qualified/certified teachers. There are of course different rules and regulations for each state and county, and you need to research these. None of my early education providers had anything higher than a B.A., the gym teacher was pregnant nine months out of every ten, and non-Catholic students were held to a different standard on everything from grading to "voluntary participation" (aka. we got to scrub the gym floor with a dishrag while everyone else went to mandatory Catholic Mass every week).

When I got to highschool I was immediately sent to remedial classes for mathematics, science, history, spanish and computer usage (Guess the Pope thinks computers and typing are fads)

Is public school more violent: Not where I attended. I think I saw one actual fistfight in four years (not including the one-sided beatings the homosexual students got on a regular basis, which isn't really a factor in elementary schools anyway).

[WildChild]

You have several considerations here. Alabama ranks in the bottom 10 of US states for quality of public education. You say you aren't very self-motivated regarding your kids education. Cost is a factor for you and while you don't hold any specific demoninational beliefs, you don't want anything taught that will conflict with these undefined beliefs.

First I'll state that I did home school for a while and my kids did exceptionally well in school. Grades weren't the focus so much as learning and making their best effort. At the elem school level I was in both classrooms every week, I graded papers, tutored kids not my own, and taught a pull out advanced math class. I was/am there for every concert, sports event, art show, science fair, ice cream social, back to school night. I meet the counselors, principals, teachers. even some of the janitors and I have been by no means the most involved parent in the schools.

My observation has been that the more connected and involved the parents are, the better the kids do and the more involved they are. (That doesn't mean running their show) YOU set the standard. Personally I always considered myself as my kids primary teacher, I didn't give a flip about the standardized tests, wasn't hard core about anything really, but did insist that they not overload themselves. They need time to be kids. I have never grounded, but have no problem talking away games or the computer for anything but homework, if they aren't getting their homework done. Again YOU set the standards and expectations.

In my area the private schools are either religious and often parishioners help out with cost or academic and also have financial assistance for qualified students. Public schools (and private) can vary widely within a school district. If your district has open enrollment, you can select the school your kids will attend. Start by arranging visits; find out what the educational philosophy is. Personally I like learning network but it depends on your child's learning style. You have to do your homework. Typically if you chose a school outside your neighborhood you will have to transport your kids.

No matter where your kids are enrolled they are likely to encounter ideas contrary to your own. There isn't much you can do about that. You can encourage intellectual exploration, critical thinking and examination of various points of view and prepare your child to live in a diverse world full of possiblities, among which they will have to make considered choices. Or you can attempt to cage their thinking and lockstep them into your beliefs. People have had what they consider success with both methods