Girls I want your opinion on pickup (guys hitting on you in a club)

[UberBicep]

I am a man, 20 years old. I have never been successful with women and last year I went about changing that and got into pickup (getting good at picking up girls in clubs). I have always considered myself to be a geek and not having too many females in my life.

So basically, after lots and lots random approaches in clubs, getting girls numbers ect and getting rejected lots, in my face, I was just wondering how you felt about this?

Are you happy that guys like me who go from never being able to get a girlfriend to someone that gets phone numbers and meets a lot of women, i.e. a player?

For those of you that have never heard of pickup it is becoming more and more common. I have read books such as The Game and Mystery Method which have taught me so much and has helped my confidence so much.

Just wondering if you like the idea or not. Sorry for busting in on a females forum!

[tritonalum07]

For me it depends. I don't like clubs because I feel like people who go there to meet someone are going there for one thing: sex. I have a pretty good radar for a guy who thinks he can pick up any girl and I generally end up being the exception. If a guy comes off as confident, that's one thing, but cocky is quite another. I don't like the player personality and can usually spot it a mile away. I don't think most self-respecting women really want to be with someone like that in the end either. Why do you feel like you need to learn how to pickup women? The right one will come along eventually, and she'll have the same types of interests and goals as you most likely. If you're trying to make yourself someone you're not, you are going to attract girls that don't like the same things you really like yourself. Just my thoughts.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Let's see, we have OG and we have LLL both guys, both know exactly what your talking about and when they see this thread, haha, watch out!!!

In my opinion? Confidence is fantastic... Whether we say yes or no to giving you a number, you gave us a lift for asking.....

As long as you are doing it for your self esteme, would treat any of those ladies, as such when taking them out, then why not.

CW

[LanaBear]

How many lines to guys use part 2?!?!?!

I was thinking the same thing.

[dr.mansview]

so you've gone from geek to player..guess that's great if those are the kind of girls that u r trying to attract but don't expect to get a gf or form a meaningful relationship with one using that method..in 5 years when your tired of that scene you'll have to take a step back and start reading books on how to date..

[UberBicep]

Thanks for your replies. I'm not doing this just for sex as it would seem. I'm just like anyone else regardless of gender, I don't want to be a lone and single. Single is horrible. It feels good to be loved and wanted by women. And it feels good to love some one too. I'm sure most people would agree.

I do see your point on becoming someone I'm not... but I am just developing myself into more confident man. I try not to use crazy pickup lines that are fake and just be myself with confidence. Other areas of my life have improved too, I am fit and healthy and my grades at university are up too.

Maybe I am asking the wrong audience, but if anyone here goes to clubs and bars... in terms of guys randomly approaching you are you fine with that? I don't know what its like to be a girl and never will, but when you go out you dress yourselves up nice, lots of make up to makes yourselves look pretty and attractive, so really you are doing this to attract your boyfriend or perhaps find a man. Plus its boosting to your ego if you see guys checking you out.

The women I spend the rest of my life with I could meet her in a cold approach. So from a females perspective how should a man go about making approaches?

Thank you!

[LanaBear]

Keep working on your confidence. Confidence is very very attractive and can attract women like nothing else.

My personal opinion, I wouldn't go looking for a serious relationship in a club... There are other places to meet someone. Personally, I don't think it matters that you used to not be able to get a girlfriend, it's what you are now... The player type?? I think that bothers a lot because a girl doesn't want to get involved with a player, it's never ending trouble.

Do you want to be recognized as a player? Personally a cocky player that thinks he's Gods gift is a huge turn off. I don't think the guys on here who are active in the pickup arena of things consider themselves as players... I could be wrong but that's my guess, I think there is a difference between the two.

Like CW said, give them a day and they will pop up.

[OG612]

I am a man, 20 years old. I have never been successful with women and last year I went about changing that and got into pickup (getting good at picking up girls in clubs). I have always considered myself to be a geek and not having too many females in my life.

Oh shat... not another PUA...

Are you happy that guys like me who go from never being able to get a girlfriend to someone that gets phone numbers and meets a lot of women, i.e. a player?

Not in the way you're using the word "player." My friend Johnny Soporno is a player. His logic: I play the game life, and I play it very well. When you take this approach, you'll take the negative connotation out of the term.

Sorry for busting in on a females forum!

Don't be sorry. Why should you be sorry for going to a place where you know you can get a woman's perspective on something?

I do see your point on becoming someone I'm not... but I am just developing myself into more confident man.

If you're using strictly the Mystery Method, then you are well on your way to losing your soul.

when you go out you dress yourselves up nice, lots of make up to makes yourselves look pretty and attractive, so really you are doing this to attract your boyfriend or perhaps find a man. Plus its boosting to your ego if you see guys checking you out.

Not entirely. Women dress up for the other women. That's why they all look the same in the club. They're all trying to get the most FEMALE attention. This, in turn, attracts more MALE attention.

Also, do yourself a favor and don't start "peacocking." If you want to attract attention in the club, do it by looking good and not by looking like a goof.

OG
Hypnotic Game Master

[danceintx]

I rarely have dated men from clubs, men trying to pick me up in bars was always a big turn off for me. I am a professional dancer though and I go to clubs when I get the chance to dance, and I met my current boyfriend in a club. He and his friend started talking to me, but didn't try to pick me up, he just hung out and talked to me like a regular person. That to me is a turn on.

[OhThereYouAre]

Thanks for your replies. I'm not doing this just for sex as it would seem.

Bah - you can't fib to me....There are three things that all men want....and two of em are money.

I do see your point on becoming someone I'm not... but I am just developing myself into more confident man. I try not to use crazy pickup lines that are fake and just be myself with confidence.

That's all good to hear. But you'll find out soon enough....A relationship founded on lies and half truths won't last. I like your last line.....rely on yourself....not on mind games.

Maybe I am asking the wrong audience, but if anyone here goes to clubs and bars... in terms of guys randomly approaching you are you fine with that? I don't know what its like to be a girl and never will, but when you go out you dress yourselves up nice, lots of make up to makes yourselves look pretty and attractive, so really you are doing this to attract your boyfriend or perhaps find a man. Plus its boosting to your ego if you see guys checking you out.

It depends...a reaction can vary from irritating to annoying to pleasantly surprised to oh snap he's hot. Just depends on how you are received. The thing you need to remember is that no matter what their reaction is, there are a hundred other girls there and you have options.

And yes, girls go to clubs to attract men. Other times, they go with friends to have fun. Some get dragged there against their will. They go for many different reasons, but in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't matter why they are there. Anyone worth approaching should be open to fun, and if they aren't, are they worth dating in the first place?

The women I spend the rest of my life with I could meet her in a cold approach. So from a females perspective how should a man go about making approaches?

Cold approach....is that PUA lingo? Reminds me of my insurance sales training, lol.

No offense to the ladies, but asking a woman what she wants to hear at any given time is futile.

-However-
Making note of something that attracted you to the woman in the first place is a good way to go. But don't put her out of your league with your first line. Be sincere. Be ballsy...be fun....what do you have to lose?