What should I think about her?

[an_goodnow]

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. I would say that we are very happy right now. Currently we are in a long distance relationship for the second time. I will be moving up to the same place as him in not too long so we don't see it as a problem. The problem is his brother's girlfriend. Problems with her started about a year ago after we got back together after a short break up. During the time that we were broken up the two of them would hang out and go to parties together. I have no problem with that. As soon as we got back together she started saying things to his mother about our relationship which was none of her business. Luckily his mother doesn't listen to it but I still don't like it. She still invites him to do a lot things with her and his brother but never invites me. Fortunately his brother will invite me a long sometimes which I think is really nice. However, when I do hang out with them I do not feel comfortable around her at all. It's almost like she is sticking her nose up at me. She has made some comments before which have made me very uncomfortable, like the fact that she wishes her boyfriend (my boyfriend's brother) had the muscles that my boyfriend does. Is she just jealous that I have been with my boyfriend longer than she has been with his brother? It kind of feels like that. But at the same time does she have some sort of desire for my boyfriend? I know it sounds weird considering she is living with his brother but it sure does feel like that sometimes. I just wish she would be a little more respectful of my relationship but I don't know how I could tell her this in a nice way. To sum it all up I am just tired of her acting better than me, talking about my relationship to my boyfriend's mother behind my back and her inappropriate comments. What should I do? Is she just jealous of me?

[brittany_nichole09]

i dont know you but this is what i think. i think that she is just jealous of you bc you have something that she wont ever have. i have an ex-best friend that is just like this girl. i mean my boyfriend used to hangout with alot of girls and i didnt like it so he stopped for awhile. but he still doesnt hangout with girls that much. i mean dont get me wrong ive felt the same way you do about everything bc you guys dont always see each other and she is always around. but dont worry about it. if he loves you like he says he does then you have no problem then. thats what i came to an inclusion to.

[Kallygirlie]

how long has the this girl been with your mans brother. Sounds to me like she is jealous. Maybe when you were broken up and they were hanging out, she started gaining feelings for him. When he went back to you, she almost felt defeated by you which is why she acts like she's better. What kind of things is she saying to his parents. i know you dont want to be mean but sometimes the best thing to do is be blunt. I would seriously ask her whats her issue with you and why is she saying these things to your boyfriends parents.

[kms]

Yeah, sounds like she likes your bf, and can't control her jealousy. She also may not be very self-aware and is unconsciously sublimating her feelings for your bf into trying to destroy you. If she can't have him, no one can...

[WildChild]

Name her stuff to her. Just simply, in a calm and pleasant voice, when she does this, ask her, "why would you say that? It sounds like you have a problem with ...".

It's negative behavior and you need to break the pattern. Try not to be confrontational just matter of fact.

[ThexMrs]

Maybe she sees you as competition. She wants to be the the mother's favorite, the best choice her son ever made and not you.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Hope your still around, as people replied on the date you posted, perhaps your only reading...

It sounds like to me, that she met her boyfriend and that was all good until she met his brother and over "events" where everyone joins in, she secretly wished her boyfriend was more like him.

The reason why your boyfriend's Mother is ignoring it is she's not silly, she was young once and can sense a woman's comments are generally for a reason, she probably suspects...

I don't think this is about you, unless you slept with a few guys during the break up and everyone knows but you don't come across in that light...

You also should give us an example over "what she says about you" to the boyfriend's Mother to ascertain a little more or show that perhaps we are on the right track.

CW