What I Need the Most ..... Is Your Support

**Juliet** · 12-16-2009 10:30 PM

You know that last, and final straw? I think I've had it.

Here's my story:
I am 23 years old, 5'10, and I currently weigh 298 pounds. I am miserable - in every way possible. I am mentally and physically exhausted of being overweight, and emotionally, I don't think I can take anymore - I am on the verge of tears at all times. Not right for anyone, let alone a 23 year old - I should be LOVING life, but yet, I despise it at times because of the way I am.

I need support. I do not get it at home. I still live with my parents due to school at the moment, and being on a student-budget I also don't have much say in the grocery-department, so I am constantly surrounded by "bad foods". I am also a vegetarian - my doctor has said that this journey would be easier if I ate meat, and I don't want this to come across as stubborn - but I can't eat meat, physically can't, so I need to do this with that diet in mind.

There is diabetes in my family, and even as I type this, right next to me is my requisition from my doctor to get blood testing to see if I, in fact, have diabetes. As horrible as this sounds, part of me wishes that I am in fact diabetic so maybe something will *snap* in my head to make me actually stick with a diet and lifestyle change.

I am not happy. I know I can be SO much better than what I am now. I need support though - which is why I joined this group. I need the support combined with "tough-love" that is non-judgemental.

I need advice in what to eat, what exercises to do, etc. Just anything - I'm tired of feeling like a failure and I know that my life could be so much better and healthier if I do this.

As depressing as that sounded, that was my introduction. Hopefully, if I ever leave, my goodbye will be a little more uplifting due to success

**Mes T** · 12-16-2009 10:38 PM

Okay there's a piece of advice I heard on TV (ahh don't judge me

) that other diet programs kind of ignore. It's this:

Eat when you're hungry, and stop when you're full.

It sounds simple, but so many people just do NOT do this. They eat when they're bored, when they're sad, when they're excited... And then they eat to the breaking point, to where they actually feel ill.

Eat when you're hungry, and stop when you're full.

Don't eat while watching TV or doing any other activity. Because that distracts your brain from telling you when you are full!!

Why can't you talk to your parents about groceries? I think that's silly, to be honest. You're an adult, they're adults, you're having problems, you CAN talk to them and tell them to buy some flippin' veggies and fruits.

And once you have those items, I'll tell you about GREEN SMOOTHIES which have changed many a life.

**Juliet** · 12-16-2009 10:44 PM

No judging! I have definitely heard that quote.
Now no judging me when I say I KNOW my eating spreads all categories - when I'm bored, when I'm sad, when I'm watching TV, when I'm stressed, when I'm studying .... etc.

Another quote that comes to mind (and it also brings the tears around) -- "I'm fat because I eat. I eat because I'm sad. I'm sad because I'm fat."
I feel like I've been caught in that vicious cycle, ON TOP of the eating even when I'm not hungry.

I wish I could talk to my parents about groceries. Oh how I've tried. I am not here to "cut them up", but they are very adament on "this is our house, we buy what we want" - and what they want isn't healthy in the least. My mom is the type to see a sale and literally buy 7 boxes of lunch-cakes. It's frusturating. BEYOND frusturating. The odd fruit and veggies we do get in the house I am grateful for - and I have been trying to expand my recipe-knowledge to see what I could make with the little that we do have.

And I would LOVE to hear about GREEN SMOOTHIES -- ingredients or no ingredients!!

**Mes T** · 12-16-2009 11:01 PM

Hmm. Seems like your parents don't see things nearly as clearly as you with regards to this, that can definitely be frustrating. Mine are similar with other things.

You've absolutely got to condition yourself to only eat when you need to. I don't think anything is going to work without this change. Try to do some research on the psychology of this topic, this is definitely not an uncommon thing, and find out how you can change this habit. I'm trying to remember what I've heard about this before... But anyway, that's number one! Absolutely the first priority.

As for green smoothies, here's something I'm gonna copy and paste from a PM I've typed it in:

Their main purpose (for me, anyway) is to give you energy. You can have a green smoothie instead of other food, OR you can have it combined with your regular diet, I find that it really doesn't matter. It still does the trick!

They're also wonderful for losing weight, if you want that. Green smoothies are great because they are surprisingly filling, so they curb your appetite.

Many people find that once they start making green smoothies a regular part of their diet, their appetite for junk food essentially disappears. We crave junk food (especially artificial sweets) because our bodies are actually missing certain nutrients, and the right green smoothie combo can really turn that around.

My favorite combination at the moment is:
- A frozen banana (frozen fruits are great because they give it that smoothie consistency that you might expect from an ice cream shake or something)
- A handful of frozen strawberries
- Couple of spoonfuls of flax seeds (which are very beneficial)
- A handful of spinach leaves (this gives it that green color without actually making it taste like vegetables)
- Half a cup or more of water

Actually that makes more than one cup of smoothie, but whatever, it's nice to go for seconds.

If you want it to be more filling, add some soy or regular milk instead of water.

And play with the combinations. Try carrots, apples, lettuce... When you pass that section in the grocery store, just think about the creative ways you can combine certain things.

In the past I've also added some maple syrup to make it extra sweet, but I find that it's usually not necessary.

**WildChild** · 12-17-2009 05:55 AM

When you go into the doctor for the diabetes test talk to them about diet and the situtation at home. It sounds like your family isn't very well informed about healthy eating, many people aren't and simply don't understand the connection between diet and health.

Ask the doctor to provide you with a good diet plan - they should have print outs of that readily available. Perhaps if you come home with this from a doctor your family will be more willing to cooperate? Start walking as much as possible. You'll be surprise at how even little changes can make a difference.

**sourpuss** · 12-17-2009 07:14 AM

I agree with WC, get a diet plan from your doctor if you can.
You don't have to eat meat to be healthy. I never ate meat as a kid and went 20 being vegetarian. I just added fish into my diet in the last couple of years out of necessity.

Steer clear of sweets and fattening foods. If all there is is junk food around, walk to the store and pick up some fruit and whole wheat bread.
Be sure to get enough protein. Beans, yogurt, cottage cheese and eggs are good. Don't just cut meat from your diet and replace it with breads and sweets.

Next time you're at the bookstore, pick up a healthy vegetarian book. There are loads of them. A nutrition book wouldn't hurt either.

EXERCISE! This is most important. Walk as your transportation. Go for a walk when you are bored, sad, or avoiding junk food. Focus on your health rather than your weight. You need to exercise and eat right for your life, considering there is diabetes in your family. I know it's harder when you don't have support right in front of you but just keep reminding yourself that you NEED to do it.

**WildChild** · 12-17-2009 07:26 AM

A good starting book might be, The Gradual Vegetarian by Lisa Tracy. I was a veretarian for a number of years and frankly found many of the vegetarian cookbooks to be full of wierd stuff I'd never eat, although I tried a lot of it - Once.
Vegetarian Times magazine has good, healthy, normal food, you might check that out.

**maisy78** · 12-17-2009 07:44 AM

First of all...you can do this! Secondly, I have a few questions.... are you a picky eater, or do you like to try new foods?
Have you tried using TVP in place of ground meat in sauces? How do you feel about lentils? These veggie friendly protein sources will give you more energy and you'll be able to be more active. Are you a fan of spicy food? Many Indian dishes are full of flavor and protein and can spice up your diet. As far as 'diets' they are yucky and don't really work. I tend to eat more protein and less carb because it works for me...but I don't think you need to eliminate carbs altogether, just be logical....multigrain pasta is better than white bread, for example.

**happytam** · 12-17-2009 08:42 AM

Knowing that you need to make changes and being willing to do it is the first step. You've already done that part, now the rest is just "follow through". As mentioned before, exercise is SO important. Dropping pounds and being healthy is difficult to do with just diet or just exercise. When you combine the two, the difference can be amazing.

Walking is a really effective, and free, way to get started. Does your school have a gym or a track? I know that going into a gym, expecially when it's filled with athletic types, can be intimidating. Just try walking around the track a few times. Get to school a little early or stay a little later. Even if you have time between classes to do a little bit of walking can be really helpful. You don't have to run or walk really fast, just enough to get the blood pumping and keep those muscles warmed up. You'll be surprised at how little time it takes before you're actually looking forward to your walks. They can be beneficial not only physically, but mentally as well. I've done some of my best thinking when out on a nice long walk and I ALWAYS feel better afterward.

Do you drink soda? If not, good for you. If so, bad bad bad. Soda is one of the worst things you can drink. I was a big time soda drinker and gave it up. Yes, it was really hard at first but it DID get easier. Now, I find myself craving big gulps of icy cold water more than anything. Delicious and refreshing!

Those are just a couple of cheap and easy ways to get started. I wish you the best of luck. Please keep us updated on your status. Remember, you DO have support here.

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