• If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Announcement

Collapse

Vote on the New WH Logo! We need YOUR help!

Everyone, we need YOUR help! Take a moment to cast your vote on the new WH logo! Vote Here!
See more
See less

Older woman rejected me :(

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    #16
    Glad to hear that Jack. Hope you will keep us in mind if you need some help navigating a situation in the future.

    Comment


      #17
      She is an alpha female, from what I've read from your post. It does also seem like she can't make up her mind about what she wants from you. Until she's clear in her own mind and tells you, there is not much else you can do. I'd move on personally, and find someone more secure in themselves and who doesn't insult you. That's what I'd do, anyhow.

      Comment


        #18
        Turns out you were right, in time i somehow did forgot about her and its been like a week or two. Although, i want your sincere opinion, i honestly think you need to give your full attention and love to woman, you need to respect her. Is that making me less "alpha" ?
        Also, all women told me that me being weak on them is going to make my life a big mess, how to stop that?

        Comment


          #19
          Oh, my dear Jack
          It absolutely doesn't make you less "alpha" to give attention, respect and love to a woman you're interested in. All things in order tho'.
          These things don't make us weak-men or women.

          The thing is, to keep your "emotions" in check. To keep the little nuances subtle, and allow all those things to grow over time. Go about it as any other woman, whether she's older than you or not. Just relax, and try not to meet someone with an objective, other than getting to know her, seeing if you like her. If you have an agenda other than this, most women will see right through it. Many won't care, especially if their agenda aligns with yours, but nevertheless, smart, intuitive women will pick up on what you're after. If your body language or demeanor demonstrates that you aren't on the same level emotionally, mentally, physically, you're likely going to be tossed aside, sometimes with the lack of tact that you've experienced already.

          I'm a 45 yr old woman, and I've dated younger men. I've dated older men. Age isn't indicative of a person's maturity or ability to manage themselves, in any given situation. I've dated older men that behave as children when faced with a discussion on any level other than what's for dinner. Yet, I've had some pretty interesting, deep discussions with intelligent and mature men in their late 20's/30's. Lack of confidence is recognizable really quickly.

          I'm not suggesting you change yourself for the purpose of attracting an older girl, but be mindful, aware and ever conscious of the vibes you're putting out there. I can typically tell after just a few minutes if a man will have my interest beyond the initial 2 sentences, or sometimes from the hand-shake, regardless of age. What is your objective with pursuing older women? Is it purely sex, or are you interested in dating older women also? Be cautious that you're not buying into stereotypes in any of this also. There's an old saying about being the type of person you want to attract.

          So, "being weak on them" can be a real turn-off early on. It doesn't make you weak, it indicates inexperience many times, or lack of self-awareness. And lack of confidence...some women may find that appealing, depending on what their objectives are in a relationship.

          I've rambled in few different directions, but I think we can open up the discussion from here
          Last edited by atskitty2; 02-19-2018, 12:51 PM.

          Comment


            #20
            Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
            Oh, my dear Jack
            It absolutely doesn't make you less "alpha" to give attention, respect and love to a woman you're interested in. All things in order tho'.
            These things don't make us weak-men or women.

            The thing is, to keep your "emotions" in check. To keep the little nuances subtle, and allow all those things to grow over time. Go about it as any other woman, whether she's older than you or not. Just relax, and try not to meet someone with an objective, other than getting to know her, seeing if you like her. If you have an agenda other than this, most women will see right through it. Many won't care, especially if their agenda aligns with yours, but nevertheless, smart, intuitive women will pick up on what you're after. If your body language or demeanor demonstrates that you aren't on the same level emotionally, mentally, physically, you're likely going to be tossed aside, sometimes with the lack of tact that you've experienced already.

            I'm a 45 yr old woman, and I've dated younger men. I've dated older men. Age isn't indicative of a person's maturity or ability to manage themselves, in any given situation. I've dated older men that behave as children when faced with a discussion on any level other than what's for dinner. Yet, I've had some pretty interesting, deep discussions with intelligent and mature men in their late 20's/30's. Lack of confidence is recognizable really quickly.

            I'm not suggesting you change yourself for the purpose of attracting an older girl, but be mindful, aware and ever conscious of the vibes you're putting out there. I can typically tell after just a few minutes if a man will have my interest beyond the initial 2 sentences, or sometimes from the hand-shake, regardless of age. What is your objective with pursuing older women? Is it purely sex, or are you interested in dating older women also? Be cautious that you're not buying into stereotypes in any of this also. There's an old saying about being the type of person you want to attract.

            So, "being weak on them" can be a real turn-off early on. It doesn't make you weak, it indicates inexperience many times, or lack of self-awareness. And lack of confidence...some women may find that appealing, depending on what their objectives are in a relationship.

            I've rambled in few different directions, but I think we can open up the discussion from here
            Thats a preety long message :P

            Well before my answer to your question on why i am attracted by older women i need to ask you something, by your words i am showing lack of confidence if i show respect and if i am love or caring towards them?

            About the part why i like older women, i can tell you a lot reasons really. I ve been told by most girls my age that i m to open, i am filled with confidence(and they dont like that for some reason), i m somehow egoistic(i really cant see that but okay), and then when i m talking to older women, they literally have the opposite opinion and tbh sometimes i like having conversations with them because well they ve been through everything and understand everything.
            There are also other reasons, i prefer sex with them, actually i love having sex with them.

            Comment


              #21
              I'm not sure what you took from my words that your interpretation is that being kind and respectful is showing a lack of confidence. That isn't what I meant. I reread my post and not sure what reads that way. Can you specify so I can clear up the confusion?

              I don't have time to comment further at this time, so I'll revisit this later.

              Comment


                #22
                You sound like a wonderful, kind, respectful and caring person: never change. The right woman will love this about you and won't see you as being weak or anything like that. Carry on being yourself and the right woman will fall head over heels for you.

                Comment


                  #23
                  Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                  So, "being weak on them" can be a real turn-off early on. It doesn't make you weak, it indicates inexperience many times, or lack of self-awareness. And lack of confidence...some women may find that appealing, depending on what their objectives are in a relationship.
                  This, and sorry if i missunderstood, english is not my native language so its hard to understand everything :P


                  Comment


                    #24
                    Originally posted by Popcorn&Candy View Post
                    You sound like a wonderful, kind, respectful and caring person: never change. The right woman will love this about you and won't see you as being weak or anything like that. Carry on being yourself and the right woman will fall head over heels for you.
                    But what if i dont want to be myself, i think thats the problem, i want to change myself from good to worse :/

                    Comment


                      #25
                      I had wondered briefly if you weren't from here...

                      Maybe I should back up the discussion, ask you to explain what it means to "be weak" on a girl?

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                        I had wondered briefly if you weren't from here...

                        Maybe I should back up the discussion, ask you to explain what it means to "be weak" on a girl?
                        My explanation is next, being weak on a girl basically means you put her needs in front of your own, you constantly think about her and ask yourself how is she. Brief explanation but thats preety much it :P

                        Comment


                          #27
                          What's your first language, and where are you from, if you don't mind sharing?

                          Comment


                            #28
                            Well, I think that early on, in any relationship, you should probably NOT be too "weak" on someone. Until the relationship has developed into something more relevant, constantly thinking about her, putting her needs ahead of yours, is probably not the healthiest approach. And even then, constantly thinking of someone, is not healthy. Putting a partner's needs above our own is a great characteristic to have, but self-care is still very important. There's a very important boundary there, with our own needs, and the needs of a partner. We cannot always be so giving, that our own needs aren't met. If a partner is not also a giver, it can become a very one-sided partnership, in which the person doing all the giving becomes exhausted and feels taken advantage of.

                            Most independent people do not like "neediness". If you are constantly thinking of and contacting someone, it can be perceived as needing a lot of attention. I'm not suggesting you are needy, as I don't know that, but it can be perceived as this when a person doesn't know you well.

                            Depending on your cultural background, these may be quite different. This is my opinion. If you are living in the US, or a Westernized culture, and intend to stay here, dating, this is an important quality to develop, without changing who you are. Just relax a bit, let things move along at a more natural pace. Dating is difficult, and even more so, when you're coming at it with a different background, and language barrier.

                            Now, if you don't mind, please explain what you've understood me to say. I want to be sure we don't miscommunicate and misunderstand each other again!

                            Comment


                              #29
                              Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                              What's your first language, and where are you from, if you don't mind sharing?
                              No problem, i m serbian :P
                              Basically you probobaly know what balkan men are, most of them are considered alpha(although like primitives). Due to my physicall looks people expect from me(especially the girls i attract) to act like that, to act like a primitive jerk and tbf i really cant pull that off

                              Comment


                                #30
                                Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
                                Well, I think that early on, in any relationship, you should probably NOT be too "weak" on someone. Until the relationship has developed into something more relevant, constantly thinking about her, putting her needs ahead of yours, is probably not the healthiest approach. And even then, constantly thinking of someone, is not healthy. Putting a partner's needs above our own is a great characteristic to have, but self-care is still very important. There's a very important boundary there, with our own needs, and the needs of a partner. We cannot always be so giving, that our own needs aren't met. If a partner is not also a giver, it can become a very one-sided partnership, in which the person doing all the giving becomes exhausted and feels taken advantage of.

                                Most independent people do not like "neediness". If you are constantly thinking of and contacting someone, it can be perceived as needing a lot of attention. I'm not suggesting you are needy, as I don't know that, but it can be perceived as this when a person doesn't know you well.

                                Depending on your cultural background, these may be quite different. This is my opinion. If you are living in the US, or a Westernized culture, and intend to stay here, dating, this is an important quality to develop, without changing who you are. Just relax a bit, let things move along at a more natural pace. Dating is difficult, and even more so, when you're coming at it with a different background, and language barrier.

                                Now, if you don't mind, please explain what you've understood me to say. I want to be sure we don't miscommunicate and misunderstand each other again!
                                i understood everything, maybe i ve said it in a bad way... lets put it this way, if i was filthy rich, i am 100% sure any woman(well any woman i find attractive) can make me buy her everything she wants through sex :/

                                Comment

                                Working...
                                X