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  • Dating again

    I broke up with my husband and my girlfriend over 3 months ago, I'm bisexuual. I haven't had sex or an orgazm in over 3 month, before that is was once a day or more.

    I spent the first month hiding in my bedroom, crying most of the time. My sisters and parents tried to cheer me up but I was to broken up to do much except eat and cry and sleep. I spent hours on the internet browsing through porn sites and masterbating. I have never in my life been able to orgasm by masterbation but I kept trying.

    I spent the second month doing mostly the same thing but instead of blaming myself for my situation, I blamed them, my husband and girlfriend. I had caught them in bed together they had betrayed me.

    For the last few weeks I have tried to get myself together, I started going out more and walking on the beach. I've even went body surfing with my sisters and brother. My sister has constantly been trying to "fix me up" with men from her school. Three weeks ago I went on a date with one of her friends. We went to a movie ans saw Aquaman, not my favorite type of movie but he had free passes. After the movie we went to Zippy's and had snacks, I told him I was diabetic and had to inject insulin before eating, he seemed to take it well. Then he took me home and we hugged at the door and he left, I went to my room with soaking panties and hating myself for not being more aggressive with him. He never called and my sister told me he wasn't into me and the insulin thing was weird. "Weird" that coming from a medical student? Any way I met a tourist while shopping in Honolulu, he was handsome and nice and we went to dinner. He didn't seem to mind my insulin injecting and wanted to spend more time with me. The next day, Saturday, he called and asked me to go to a luau his hotel was having that night. We had a great time eating, I even had 2 drinks. We danced a little, I'm a terrible dancer but he didn't seem to mind. We sat on the beach for an hour kissing and he asked me up to his hotel room. by this time I was so aroused I immediately said yes. In his room we made out and kissed for a while then we did it. He tried for as long as he could but I couldn't orgasm. It ended with me sleeping on a chase all night and going home in the morning. Now I'm more desperate than ever, maybe I I can never enjoy sex with a man again. I've read about women that want sex so desperately but can never be satisfied, is that what I've become. Maybe the next time I should go out with a woman.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Not thinking about anything is Zen. Once you know this, walking, sitting, or lying down, everything you do is Zen.
    ― Bodhidharma

  • Originally posted by chaya View Post
    I broke up with my husband and my girlfriend over 3 months ago, I'm bisexuual. I haven't had sex or an orgazm in over 3 month, before that is was once a day or more.

    I spent the first month hiding in my bedroom, crying most of the time. My sisters and parents tried to cheer me up but I was to broken up to do much except eat and cry and sleep. I spent hours on the internet browsing through porn sites and masterbating. I have never in my life been able to orgasm by masterbation but I kept trying.

    I spent the second month doing mostly the same thing but instead of blaming myself for my situation, I blamed them, my husband and girlfriend. I had caught them in bed together they had betrayed me.

    For the last few weeks I have tried to get myself together, I started going out more and walking on the beach. I've even went body surfing with my sisters and brother. My sister has constantly been trying to "fix me up" with men from her school. Three weeks ago I went on a date with one of her friends. We went to a movie ans saw Aquaman, not my favorite type of movie but he had free passes. After the movie we went to Zippy's and had snacks, I told him I was diabetic and had to inject insulin before eating, he seemed to take it well. Then he took me home and we hugged at the door and he left, I went to my room with soaking panties and hating myself for not being more aggressive with him. He never called and my sister told me he wasn't into me and the insulin thing was weird. "Weird" that coming from a medical student? Any way I met a tourist while shopping in Honolulu, he was handsome and nice and we went to dinner. He didn't seem to mind my insulin injecting and wanted to spend more time with me. The next day, Saturday, he called and asked me to go to a luau his hotel was having that night. We had a great time eating, I even had 2 drinks. We danced a little, I'm a terrible dancer but he didn't seem to mind. We sat on the beach for an hour kissing and he asked me up to his hotel room. by this time I was so aroused I immediately said yes. In his room we made out and kissed for a while then we did it. He tried for as long as he could but I couldn't orgasm. It ended with me sleeping on a chase all night and going home in the morning. Now I'm more desperate than ever, maybe I I can never enjoy sex with a man again. I've read about women that want sex so desperately but can never be satisfied, is that what I've become. Maybe the next time I should go out with a woman.
    You said you broke up. Are you in the process of getting a divorce?

    As far as orgasming, you mentioned before that you were able to reach orgasm with your girlfriend. I don't remember, did you orgasm with your husband? It will probably take a guy a while to figure out what works. It may take a guy who keeps at it over a number of sessions. Best wishes.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

    Comment


    • Hey chaya. Maybe you're just moving a bit too fast for yourself emotionally? For many of us, the ability to have an orgasm is tied to our emotional state (as well as physical state). If you are not comfortable, you may have trouble achieving orgasm. Be patient with yourself.
      "Be what you're looking for."

      Comment


      • I agree. I think one of the biggest mistakes we make after a severed relationship, is to jump into something we're not ready for. Allow yourself time to heal, and gain some perspective.

        Comment

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