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Problem in daily life with Husband....

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  • Problem in daily life with Husband....

    Hi there,
    I am an Indian women n now in a big trouble. I am married since 3 years n it was never a smooth relationship between us. We both are not satisfied with our relationship. And so many times I found my husband talking to other girls. Sometimes with his ex girlfriend and sometimes he shared his feelings towards some girls. I am really fade up. I cant tell my family as they will be hurt and they cant even think all these thing about my husband. I made his image to my family as a very good husband. I married to this guy on my own choice and decision. So I cant even think of getting divorced.

    His family never accepted our relationship, they dont even talk to me. He left his home as there was never a good relationship between my husband and his family. Now he blames me everyday that he had to leave his home because of me. I am in USA now and in India I was doing a job. Here I cant do any job because of my Visa status. So I am completely dependent on him. He bring the issue everyday that I dont earn and just living on him money so I should keep quite. Sometimes I also react badly but what to do! I just cant tolerate all the time, though I ignore most of the time.

    Now my life is more than a hell, no friends, no job, no love and no careness too. I got pregnant and we both were not ready for the baby. So we decided to go for abortion. But he never even think of that what I am going through. He has no emotional attachment for the baby too. It was just a headache to him. All these thing hurts me a lot.

    I never cheated him and I will never do that. He wrote one girl before some day that "You know how I feel about you, I want to feel u now, I cant see u in a trouble" and so many things. He used to talk to that girl over the phone. If I try to say something he blames me back. Is this normal to talk with a girl this way? Really need help.

  • Hi Sakira

    It seems to me that due to your predicament of being on a Visa, he feels that he can verbally abuse you, put you down, as well as do what he likes, play the field as it appears that what you both thought you had, you do not have and there is no love there on either side.

    It is difficult because now, due to those circumstances, you just live. Due to those circumstances, he carrys the bills.

    If two people are not happy, there should be nothing stopping either of you in working out how you can change that and in this case, it seems that you should go home, get back on with your life, career and take this as a lesson for next time you meet someone, ensure you are totally and honestly in love before marriage.

    I am sorry about the decision of the baby must have been hard for you.

    Our parents are not stupid, they are aware we are human and make mistakes, it's time to call them and let them know, and go back home. Work the rest out later.

    It is good that you believe in marriage and won't cheat, must feel horrible reading those messages where he is at the worse, emotionally cheating. But, for both of your sakes, I would suggest that this marriage is over and it's time to make plans so you can both be happy and live your lives.


    • Bumping for other member's thoughts.....


      • Originally posted by sakira View Post
        I am married since 3 years n it was never a smooth relationship between us. We both are not satisfied with our relationship. ... I married to this guy on my own choice and decision.
        What was your relationship like before marriage? Sometimes people hide personality defects to get a person to marry them. He may have done that.

        Divorces occur in both love marriages and in arranged marriages. As CW indicated, I don't think this marriage will stand.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia


        • Ask him that you need to set sort of a meeting (should be at home) to discuss your current marriage status and what are the alternatives you both may choose. some husbands have superficial thinking of their marriage life. He should consider marriage as very important project where he needs to use his best including emotional and every thing to come up with a decision.

          I would advice you both to utilize the Couples Counselling services to help you.

          I will pry for you to resolve this issue.



          • Yes it is true that problem in daily life with husband is normal matter for everyone.So everyday they are quarreling with others.


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