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Am I missing out?

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  • Am I missing out?

    Hi there.
    I think I know the answer to this, but just want to make sure, I guess.
    I am in a great relationship with my fiancé, and we are due to get married in a week's time and I am excited
    We were 26 when we first met, and I was a virgin until I met him. We actually slept together the first night we met, but that is another story! Originally Our sex life is ok. It was amazing when we first started but understandably has calmed down now with time. I was planning to be a virgin until I got married, but that was less for religious reasons and more for ease. I work in a male dominated environment and I found it easier to have that rule and have it "known" than have guys thinking they would be in with a chance if they put the effort in. I actually kinda got sick of not knowing what everyone was talking about or being awkward around the subject.
    So I have only had sex with the one guy, the one I am marrying. I know it seems to be important for men to experiment a lot and "spread their seed" and all that jazz. Basically have a great time with lots of women.
    I don't think that it is important for women, but am I missing out on being with other men by only ever having sex with the one man? I'm not suggesting that I would sleep with another man just to see what it's like, and I do intend to spend the rest of my life with my fiance, and to be faithful to him.
    I guess I'm just wondering whether there is more out there that I am potentially missing out on?
    What do you think?

  • I have also only ever been with my husband (13 years) and I have never felt that I was missing out. Missing out on what? Being with a guy who doesn’t adore me the way my husband does? a guy who I might catch an STD from? A guy who might have a whole host of ”issues” that I don’t ned or want to deal with? I just think I was lucky enough to find my perfect guy at a young age and why wander or experiment if I already have what I want. Some people go their whole lives and never find the right match, seems like you have found yours. Of course, it is very dependent on whether you’re happy in your relationship or not. It seems like you are.


    • Compatibility is a funny thing. Even though there are billions of other men on earth, what are the chances that you're going to find somebody more compatible for you than your fiancé? Probably not very good. It doesn't sound like you're dissatisfied with your relationship, it just sounds like you're thinking of "what-if"s and having a little wet feet. It's a big decision to be with one person the rest of your life. You're just giving it due consideration.

      If you stay with you fiancé forever, you won't ever have a new relationship again or feel that rush you get with a new crush. There will still be new possibilities to dream of in marriage, but they will be different. You won't be able to look forward to the first kiss, or first sex, or meeting the parents anymore, but think of all the great things you CAN look forward to, like buying a home (or paying off your mortgage!) joint vacations, having children, being part of a his family, etc.
      <center><i>Nature gives us shapeless shapes,<br>Clouds and waves and flame,<br>But human expectation is that love remains the same,<br>And when it doesn’t, we point our fingers and blame.</i><br><a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/register.php">Register</a>|<a href="http://www.womens-health.com/boards/members/little.html">Contact Admin</a>|<a href="mailto:support*womens-health.com?subject=Forum Contact">Email Admin</a></center>


      • You both need to work to keep your sex life amazing. The biggest problem with not having experience is that if your sex life with your husband becomes dull, you will tend to imagine that it could be much better with someone else and that provides temptation. If your sex life is good, then it will be better with your regular partner than with someone else.


        • Thanks for advice

          Thanks for the advice, ladies
          I knew that I would get some other ideas to disrupt my sometimes circular thought patterns!
          I am completely happy in my relationship. We are a great team, we have our arguments of course but I couldn't ask for anyone better for me.
          As I (slowly!) mature I am conscious that I am changing the way I look at those milestones Little mentioned. They are becoming exciting, but in a different way (not worse) to what you feel with a new crush.


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