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Parenting starts when they turn 18

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  • Parenting starts when they turn 18

    Now I get it when my mom said parenting never stops.

    The easy part was from birth til they turn 18.

    The challenge begins as we attempt to prepare our young teenager for adulthood.

    Sex and drugs are probably the topic most talked about

    but what about financing, communication and etiquette?
    what about smart shopping, comparative shopping and consumerism?
    what about contracts and planning?

    My parenting manual doesn't seem to have a last chapter.
    “My quest is to touch people’s lives in a positive way through kindred spirit and goodwill.” Daisy

  • I find that most of my actions now are formed by watching my parents growing up. I don't watch the use of the A/C in the summer or how long the fridge stays open because they told me...I do it because I heard things like "we're not paying to cool the outside" or asking me why I left a light on in a room I wasn't using. Hearing those things - as well as watching them turn off lights when they left a room etc... - is what made me the way I am. I still call my mom for specific questions like when my bf and I were considering buying vs renting. And I still call my dad when a mechanic tells me I need something that doesn't sound right. I don't know if you consider that 'parenting' or more of a friendship? Heck, most of the time I call my mom it's for a specific question and we end up talking for an hour about random stuff.

    I grew up with really open communication though. So when I went to a friend's party and they all started smoking pot, it made me feel awkward so I called my mom and asked her to come get me. I think when kids don't have that kind of communication with their parents they would have stayed to avoid the conflict and maybe end up succumbing to peer pressure. And my sister got pregnant at 17 bc my mom refused to help her get birth control. So when I became a teenager it was way more responsible to just ask me "are you having sex?" and I was honest. Then we talked about condoms etc...

    I don't think it should have a "last chapter". That, to me, implies that your relationship ends. Maybe instead look at it as starting a new volume? Birth to teenage years is only the first volume. The next one should be more about building a relationship not based on results and consequences but on trust. I have a much different relationship with my mom now than I did at 16.

    Comment


    • **LoL** Thats true!
      Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
      Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow.

      ~ Mary Jean Irion ~

      Comment


      • As our child gets older, parenting does become a lot more difficult. There are just things that school cannot teach and only we, parents can.

        Comment

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