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  • adoption

    for those coming to this site hoping for a family,
    please consider adoption

    there are many paths to adoption such as domestic, foster-to-adopt, and international adoption

    hoping that others would consider adoption
    every child deserves a family

  • #2

    everyday am so thankful for this child husband and I are blessed to raise
    definitely worth the adoption wait to become a family!

    Comment


    • #3
      adoption is not in the news everyday like it used to be
      however, adoptions are still taking place; it's a wonderful way to start a family or add to your family

      Comment


      • #4
        people may think they might not be able to bond with an adopted child or that the child might not attach to them

        there are lots of ways to establish that connection
        if the child is a baby or toddler, carrying them around a lot helps
        we rocked our child a lot; I continued rocking for as long as our child could sit on my lap
        hugging everyday; we still do this and our child has been home a number of years
        looking in your child's eyes and having them establish eye contact
        playing childhood games like peek-a-boo
        there are also books and websites dedicated to the topic of attachment/ bonding

        Comment


        • #5
          I wanted to adopt since I was a teenager. Not sure why I never got it done.
          My ex husband and I had decided to adopt, went to the foster care facility in our city and did some checking into options. I should say that I did, in hindsight I can see his lack of interest.

          Obviously for the best that it didn't happen.

          I support adoption 100%, and I'm still open to doing it, though at my age, it's not likely to happen.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by atskitty2 View Post
            though at my age, it's not likely to happen.
            we know a family who adopted an older child (age7) this past year
            both are over 50

            they might have had to get a waiver on their ages as they may be over the age limit for country they adopted from

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            • #7
              Back then, I was maybe 35 and hubs would've been 37 and we were approaching the age limit then, as I believe it was 40...so I haven't even looked into it recently. Being single likely wouldn't help me either.

              Comment


              • #8
                being single is tougher to adopt although not impossible
                but the rules change all the time for adoption, for every country

                one would need to find out the current rules for the country they are adopting from and the regulations the country they live in has concerning adoption

                Comment


                • #9
                  Adoption can be wonderful: for both the child/young adult and adult. My best friend was a foster child, as her mum had a mental illness. Of course, there can be difficulties but I agree it can be a good thing.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    every country has it's own rules re adoption
                    and in U.S. each state may have differing rules

                    our adoption required a home study and this is what I recall:

                    local fire dept checked our smoke detectors/ fire extinguishers
                    social worker looked at every level of house, also
                    we were asked if we owned guns
                    letter from employer of proof of job/ income
                    SAHM needed a statement, also even if no income
                    provide assets/liabilities as well as proof of insurances
                    FBI fingerprints and state fingerprints
                    child abuse clearance from every state lived in
                    autobiographies written
                    parenting classes as well as required reading
                    CPR classes
                    meeting with social worker 3 times and asked various questions: why adopting, parenting style, etc
                    interviewed by social worker as a couple and Individually
                    needed letters of reference
                    certified birth certificates and marriage certificate
                    medical physical which included blood work


                    Comment


                    • #11
                      so simple
                      Last edited by jns; 08-19-2017, 09:56 AM. Reason: Outbound links are not allowed.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by amy40 View Post
                        every country has it's own rules re adoption
                        and in U.S. each state may have differing rules

                        our adoption required a home study and this is what I recall:

                        local fire dept checked our smoke detectors/ fire extinguishers
                        social worker looked at every level of house, also
                        we were asked if we owned guns
                        letter from employer of proof of job/ income
                        SAHM needed a statement, also even if no income
                        provide assets/liabilities as well as proof of insurances
                        FBI fingerprints and state fingerprints
                        child abuse clearance from every state lived in
                        autobiographies written
                        parenting classes as well as required reading
                        CPR classes
                        meeting with social worker 3 times and asked various questions: why adopting, parenting style, etc
                        interviewed by social worker as a couple and Individually
                        needed letters of reference
                        certified birth certificates and marriage certificate
                        medical physical which included blood work

                        So much inspection, whereas natural birth requires none of that. A list of reasons that I find adoption in the USA being discouraged.
                        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                        ...
                        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by jns View Post
                          A list of reasons that I find adoption in the USA being discouraged.
                          to make the process smoother, my recommendation is to use a local agency, who can help you with everything

                          I think carrying a baby for 9 mos and going through labor would be much more difficult than the adoption process

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by jns View Post
                            So much inspection, whereas natural birth requires none of that. .
                            I would find the physician inspections while pregnant and then delivery much more intrusive than any of the social worker questions we had to answer


                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by amy40 View Post
                              local fire dept checked our smoke detectors/ fire extinguishers
                              social worker looked at every level of house, also
                              we were asked if we owned guns
                              letter from employer of proof of job/ income
                              SAHM needed a statement, also even if no income
                              provide assets/liabilities as well as proof of insurances
                              FBI fingerprints and state fingerprints
                              child abuse clearance from every state lived in
                              autobiographies written
                              parenting classes as well as required reading
                              CPR classes
                              meeting with social worker 3 times and asked various questions: why adopting, parenting style, etc
                              interviewed by social worker as a couple and Individually
                              needed letters of reference
                              certified birth certificates and marriage certificate
                              medical physical which included blood work
                              I find this list to be extreme.
                              I grew up in a house without fire detectors and without fire extinguishers. It never caught fire.
                              Are social workers certified or have a background in looking at houses such as a contractor or qualified safety expert would have? Is the homeowner indemnified for defects not found?
                              What do guns have to do with anything? Why not ask if you have ever had any contact that has ever been criminally charged or convicted?
                              Proof of job? Discriminating against those who don't have one? Or is this for having something to sue over?
                              Statements to SAHM? Why?
                              Finances and insurance? Again discriminatory.
                              Fingerprints for what?
                              Child abuse clearance - at last one I can believe in. I didn't see a state psychologist clearance as for the potential for child abuse - was there one? How about child abuse in a person's background such as by a parent or by a friend.
                              Autobiographies written? Seems foolish.
                              Most people have been raised by people who never took a parenting class. I am curious whether parenting classes actually statistically lead to better children? Studies? Otherwise such classes should be recommended but not required.
                              CPR classes are useful for everyone as are first aid classes and use of an AED. Was a working AED usable with a child also required?
                              Would a first time parent actually have a parenting style? Follow every word of Dr. Benjamin Spock? I know my mother had distinct disagreements with some of the things he wrote.
                              No problem with meetings and interviews as long as they are reasonably related to the adoption.
                              Letters of reference about what? Neighbor of perpetrators of tragedies always tell of how they were such good people. Such references often lack impartiality.
                              I'm not sure I see the reason for a birth certificate or a marriage certificate.
                              What is the physical and blood work for? What forms of discrimination result from these tests?
                              I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                              ...
                              Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                              From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

                              Comment

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